Some wacky headlines from a variety of newspapers:

1. Include Your Children when Baking Cookies
2. Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says
3. Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers
4. Safety Experts Say School Bus Passengers Should Be Belted
5. Drunk Gets Nine Months in Violin Case
6. Survivor of Siamese Twins Joins Parents
7. Iraqi Head Seeks Arms
8. Prostitutes Appeal to Pope
9. Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over
10. British Left Waffles on Falkland Islands
11. Lung Cancer in Women Mushrooms
12. Eye Drops Off Shelf
13. Teachers Strike Idle Kids
14. Clinton Wins on Budget, But More Lies Ahead
15. Enraged Cow Injures Farmer With Ax
16. Plane Too Close to Ground, Crash Probe Told
17. Miners Refuse to Work after Death
18. Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant
19. Stolen Painting Found by Tree
20. Two Sisters Reunited After 18 Years in Checkout Counter
21. Killer Sentenced to Die for Second Time in 10 Years
22. Never Withhold Herpes Infection from Loved One
23. War Dims Hope for Peace
24. If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last a While
25. Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures
26. Deer Kill 17,000
27. Enfields Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide
28. Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges
29. Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead
30. Man Struck By Lightning Faces Battery Charge
31. New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group
32. Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft
33. Kids Make Nutritious Snacks
34. Chef Throws His Heart into Helping Feed Needy
35. Arson Suspect Held in Massachusetts Fire
36. Ban On Soliciting Dead in Trotwood
37. Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half
38. New Vaccine May Contain Rabies
39. Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors

Some wacky headlines from a variety of newspapers:

19. Stolen Painting Found by TreeCan't you just picture it? "Sargeant? There's an elm here to see you. Says he's got a stolen Renoir he found in a dumpster behind a coffee shop!"


39. Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors

I like this one, too. "Why are those doctors suing us again? Oh, yeah. They claim our doors are too short."

Yours in Christ,

Benjamin

:lol: Where do you fiind these things Sojourner55? They're hysterical! :lol:

Jeanne

Can't you just picture it? "Sargeant? There's an elm here to see you. Says he's got a stolen Renoir he found in a dumpster behind a coffee shop!"



I like this one, too. "Why are those doctors suing us again? Oh, yeah. They claim our doors are too short."

Yours in Christ,

Benjamin

Yeah, wording something without thinking it through can have hilarious results--especially in a national publication. (Lucky for us they didn't bother proof-reading).

:lol: Where do you fiind these things Sojourner55? They're hysterical! :lol:

Jeanne

Please, call me Randy. :wave: Actually, so far, most of them are from the "Uncle John's" book series--which in turn, culled them from somewhere else. Fortunately however, a quick "Googling" turned up nearly all of them on a variety of websites--already typed up for me, and everything. I don't know who had the copyrights originally, but they are everywhere now. I have some more goodies I think are also funny enough to share, so I'll probably be posting them in the not-too-distant future. Glad you're enjoying them.

These are fantastic! thanks for sharing them with us.

These are fantastic! thanks for sharing them with us.

You're very welcome. We all need a little chuckle now and then. I like # 32. I can just picture him sheepishly saying, "I'm really sorry. I knew I shouldn't have had that bean burrito for lunch."