Chronicles of the Mind

When I went to Bible School, I quickly developed an essential habit: spending 45 minutes to an hour at the start of each day in the Presence of God in the chapel. Though this meant getting up at 5 a.m. and though those times were rarely spectacular, I see now how they brought the Presence of God to the rest of my life and empowered me to walk in the Spirit.

Since graduating, these times have slowly dwindled to the point where I now spend maybe 10-15 minutes praying at the start of the ...

Do you ever have things like this or am I the only one? One day you're up and full of faith, the next you feel deflated and ready to give up. What looked bright and sunny yesterday, appears dark and gloomy today. The result is often a mood where you just feel like crawling into bed and go to sleep, hoping that reality looks better when you wake up.

My weekend was like that. Thursday and Friday, I could tell my faith was being tested. God had recently spoken to me to raise my shield ...

249 days...is a loooong time. People tell me it will be over before I know it. But they're not sitting in this office; their fiancee is not on the other side of the Atlantic. I cried like a little kid yesterday while sitting on my bed. I cannot help it - what can I do? Only the grace of God can keep us sane. I love her to pieces and know the wait will be more than worth it. And we started at 289 days, so it's not all that bad...but it's a long time still.

What do you see when you look at me? Do you see an intelligent, anointed, musically and socially gifted individual without a care in the world on his mind? Do you see the optimistic Dutchman that is always in for a good discussion? Do you see the theologian that knows his verses and knows what he believes?

What about the other side of me? I see all those things you see, too. Yes, God has truly blessed me...but what about that other side of me? I must confess to you that I am mostly ...

When I found out that meeting the requirements of bringing my fiancée to Holland is almost impossible for me at this point in time, we decided to go for the other option: bringing me to the States. This was the easier option, it seemed...and it is. But easier definitely does not mean easy! What do I mean? Take a look...

First a petition needs to be submitted by Ruth. She needs an I-129F form, a copy of her passport, a G325-a form filled in and signed by both her and me, a passport-size ...