I have a couple questions...

[Metalwolf]

I am a bit nervous about posting or starting a thread a this site, as the last time I had really been here I was kind of a depressed emotional wreck. So I don't know if I gave people an odd impression, or even a bad one, especially as I am still kind of new to this site.

But here goes:
Since that time, I have still stayed in therapy. On my issue (It is the obsession about having a baby through AI even though I am not married) I have been looking it up in the Bible to see what it says about this kind of thing in this particular way, and it says nothing. Even though that is a scary thing for me to do. I have looked it up to make sure it is not adultery, nor fornication.

But anyway, that part is not what I am asking advice on. What I am asking is, how far should one go to remove an unacceptable desire?

I have asked God to remove it, but I don't know if I am doing something wrong spiritually because He is not removing it. My mother wants me to go see a hypnotist, and she has even found one through a doctor that she wants me to go to. I don't know if I should go, but I will feel that God might hold me accountable if I didn't try everything in my power to get rid of it, including considering taking powerful medications like Haldol.

There was a point, although very brief, that I even considered witchcraft (I know, very dumb), because I was thinking, If God won't take this away, then I know someone who will. Its not that I was intending to rebel against God, I just assumed that He would approve of anyway possible, right? Especially if you assume that God views this obsession as bad and following through with it would be worse. And the means of getting rid of it even though questionable, didn't matter as long as the obsession was gone. And if God wasn't willing to do it, why not go around Him? Surely He would still be pleased that the obsession was gone?

The point is, I am trying to do what I think God wants me to do (ie get rid of the obsession), I know death isn't the answer, but I am afraid thatif I were to give into the obsession, God would be mad at me. I can't make it go away, no matter what I read or do, and if I read somewhere that it is sin, the only result that will happen will be that I will feel real awful when I eventually give in to it and afraid to touch a Bible ever again.

I only wish that I could find a Bible study on it, one that is objective and does not assume "it is sin" or "it is not sin," but lets you get that for yourself.

[cheech]

Going around God, over God, under God just to get rid of something you feel he doesn't want you to have isn't going to make him any happier. This would fall in line with disobedience. It would only make 2 things you were doing wrong instead of just the one.

When you want to do the right thing, you go to God then you wait patiently for Him to work. We don't just go to him once, twice or even three times. It requires us going to him every single day with our request. I'm reminded of the following scripture about being persistent in what we ask for:

Luke 18:1-8
1Then Jesus told his disciples a parable to show them that they should always pray and not give up. 2He said: "In a certain town there was a judge who neither feared God nor cared about men. 3And there was a widow in that town who kept coming to him with the plea, 'Grant me justice against my adversary.' 4"For some time he refused. But finally he said to himself, 'Even though I don't fear God or care about men, 5yet because this widow keeps bothering me, I will see that she gets justice, so that she won't eventually wear me out with her coming!' " 6And the Lord said, "Listen to what the unjust judge says. 7And will not God bring about justice for his chosen ones, who cry out to him day and night? Will he keep putting them off? 8I tell you, he will see that they get justice, and quickly. However, when the Son of Man comes, will he find faith on the earth?"

Be persistent in your prayers to remove this stronghold. It requires you getting down on your knees every day, repenting for your thoughts, and asking God to help you remove this stronghold in your life. It takes more than a few times. To go to another source, especially if the source is opposite of God, will only make things worse and your life more miserable.

I can't recall your thread before with this issue but I'm assuming you are young. Do not think God does not hear your prayers because he does, but he works in his own timing.

As for the hypnotist, I would advise against it:

1 Peter 4:7
7The end of all things is near. Therefore be clear minded and self-controlled so that you can pray.

1 Peter 1:13:
[ Be Holy ] Therefore, prepare your minds for action; be self-controlled; set your hope fully on the grace to be given you when Jesus Christ is revealed.

Continue with your therapist. Speak to a Pastor also for the spiritual side of things. Ask yourself why you want to have a baby at this time...are you trying to fill a void in your life (love)? Then how did you plan on having it? The natural way of getting pregnant or artificially. If it's the natural way then you know for a fact that intercourse before marriage is wrong:

Romans 1:28-32
28And even as they did not like to retain God in their knowledge, God gave them over to a reprobate mind, to do those things which are not convenient; 29Being filled with all unrighteousness, fornication, wickedness, covetousness, maliciousness; full of envy, murder, debate, deceit, malignity; whisperers, 30Backbiters, haters of God, despiteful, proud, boasters, inventors of evil things, disobedient to parents, 31Without understanding, covenantbreakers, without natural affection, implacable, unmerciful: 32Who knowing the judgment of God, that they which commit such things are worthy of death, not only do the same, but have pleasure in them that do them.

The key is finding the root problem...why you feel the need to have a child out of wedlock. Then you work from there asking God to remove whatever it is hindering you. Pray for God to bring forth the truth and anything that is causing this want of having a child at this time. I don't know your full situation. I can only comment on the info given.

[Sold Out]

I only wish that I could find a Bible study on it, one that is objective and does not assume "it is sin" or "it is not sin," but lets you get that for yourself.

The best thing you can do at this point is just understand what God expects of you right now. Although AI is not specifically addressed in scripture, we do know that children are a blessing from the Lord, and that the spiritual instruction and discipline should come from the father. If there is no husband/father in this AI equation, then we must deduce that it is not something God would approve of. He instituted the family first, and puts great emphasis on it. A child needs godly parents - mother and father.

Secondly, please be aware that Satan is looking for any opportunity to divert you off the plan God has for your life. He will look for any vulnerability or deep-seeded desire to prey upon. Unfortunately most Christians fail to see the spiritual battle that is taking place around them.

With that said, to rid yourself of this nagging desire, you must purge it out. You must renew your mind to align your thinking with God's. The only way to do this is through personal bible reading, prayer, and getting yourself under the influence of the Word of God through a local church. If you start allowing these things to consume your time, you will soon find the old desires start to fade and you will begin to look for ways to please God and to serve God's people. It's no big secret...it's just learning to be faithful and allowing God to transform your mind. Just be willing.

[Emily]

I only wish that I could find a Bible study on it, one that is objective and does not assume "it is sin" or "it is not sin," but lets you get that for yourself.

To be brutally honest with you, it is a sin, but I think that you do not want to acknowledge that fact. The fact that you would consider witchcraft to take away the desire to have a child out of wedlock is proof of that.

Speaking as someone who used to practice witchcraft (and many other occult practices) ... do you realize that by practicing, or entertaining the thought of practicing witchcraft, you are basically using, relying on, or attempting to use satan's power to achieve your goal? Do you understand that the devil and his demons are the "power" behind witchcraft? Do you understand the extreme danger in allowing the enemy of God into your life?

I don't think its dumb--I think its very scary that you are allowing the devil to totally manipulate your thinking. I think this makes it abundantly clear that your desire for a child out of wedlock is in fact a sin and is unGodly. Also, the fact that you feel a NAGGING need that there is something wrong. Your Holy Spirit is grieving this choice you are making.

My suggestion ... one way to get rid of the obsession is to realize that what you are doing is a sin. To me, your inability to see this as a sin is denial of Biblical/Christian reality on your part. Its not any different from a homosexual couple convinced that their relationship isnt sinful, and that their relationship is blessed by God. Until you acknowledge that it is a sin, you will not be able to make the obsession go away. You can think what you want and convince yourself of almost anything, but the Bible is clear. What you are contemplating doing is a sin, plain and simple, like it or not, take it or leave it! It is what it is.

I mean, this is going to be a process--it will take a lot of work on your part but I think realizing that this is really seriously a sin is going to hit home for you and help convict you. God doesn't want this for you. AI is not an option and you need to let it go. The stumbling block for you is, you have the ability to exercise your will in this case. You can simply make an appointment, drive down to the clinic, and have the procedure done for a nominal fee, and you are on your way to realizing your dream. It may seem easy and inexpensive, but if its not God's will, God will not bless this choice you are making. There will be repercussions.

I understand that you want children. I really do understand that desperation and have contemplated AI myself (thinking, if I am not married by "X" age I will consider my options). I TOTALLY understand the thundering sound of your biological clock ticking in your ear. But let God work His will. He knows you want children. Will you give him a chance? And realize also that if something happens and you cant have your own children, you can always adopt. And if you are married at that time, you can maybe get an egg donor. In the meantime you can maybe look into freezing your eggs for future use (when you're married). There are a lot of options open to us in this day and age, that do align with Biblical principles. Finally, most importantly, don't forget Sarah. God gave her a child in old age, because God does not have "can't" in his vocabulary. God hasn't changed. God can do anything. God knows the desires of your heart and wants to give them to you. Do yourself a favor and try things God's way. :hug:

[unkerns]

Theres only one way to do this, and that is with Yahweh. If you put any trust in other methods you will fail every time. You would have to put it all on the line for the Lord. This means that you would also need to take the focus off of yourself and go help some other people, you would need to get out with others and fellowship and have some fun. When you sit around and stew all day on this, what are you doing? your focusing on yourself. Also if there is anything in your life that triggers this than get rid of it.

May the Lord be with you on your journey

[Metalwolf]

Hi, sorry that it has taken me some time to come back to this thread, but I have been really busy at work lately.

To be brutally honest with you, it is a sin, but I think that you do not want to acknowledge that fact. The fact that you would consider witchcraft to take away the desire to have a child out of wedlock is proof of that. Its not the issue of whether its a sin or not that is affecting me, but that I just can't get this desire to go away. Its like my mind is stuck on running on high speed. I don't mean like racing thoughts or anything, but its more like it is on my mind so heavily that it is wearing it out. I have had obsessions before ( I have mild autism) but none to this degree. This is so bad, that it is actually unpleasent. I want God to take it away, I have even tried to search within myself to see what was making this so strong, but at the bottom all I came up with was a pure desire. The only thing I can think of that might have triggered it was that a week or two before one of my sheep had lambs.

And to add this, and I am not adding this part to be contentious (that is, it doesn't mean that I am telling you that you are wrong) but the reason I was wondering about a Bible study on this subject is so I can look it up for myself to see if it is wrong or not. It is nothing against you, but I must check what the Bible says and see if the positions (for or against) are correct. It is something I strongly feel convicted on to do, even on my most cherished subjects. I must make sure that I check a position against the Scriptures (even one that I don't like to go against such as mine) otherwise I feel uncomfortable. It is a precaution, to make sure what is being said is Biblically correct.




Speaking as someone who used to practice witchcraft (and many other occult practices) ... do you realize that by practicing, or entertaining the thought of practicing witchcraft, you are basically using, relying on, or attempting to use satan's power to achieve your goal? Do you understand that the devil and his demons are the "power" behind witchcraft? Do you understand the extreme danger in allowing the enemy of God into your life? I did repent of that thought about using it, and I asked God to not let me consider that idea again. It was very foolish and idiotic, and I really don't want to stoop to that level ever again. At the time I was really mad, and I had a near "at any cost, just get rid of it" mentality.


I don't think its dumb--I think its very scary that you are allowing the devil to totally manipulate your thinking. I think this makes it abundantly clear that your desire for a child out of wedlock is in fact a sin and is unGodly. Also, the fact that you feel a NAGGING need that there is something wrong. Your Holy Spirit is grieving this choice you are making. Trust me when I say I would rather not be driven to do it. I would rather be married when I have kids, I would rather have a husband. Its not that I am going about thinking that everything will be perfect if I have a kid in this manner, infact I will be made to move out, I will have terrible financial troubles, I will be made poorer then I am now, I will have to juggle work and raising a kid. I don't even like kids to an extent. I don't like the idea of doing this, I would rather go to school to be a pilot and fly commercial cargo planes for a living. I would be giving up so much. It is just the fact that its driving me to do this, that no matter how hard I try, it doesn't go away. And its not that I won't go against this, anytime I try it feels horrible, like I am being torn in pieces. It is like an extreme emotional upheavel when I try, it is hard to explain.


My suggestion ... one way to get rid of the obsession is to realize that what you are doing is a sin. To me, your inability to see this as a sin is denial of Biblical/Christian reality on your part. Its not any different from a homosexual couple convinced that their relationship isnt sinful, and that their relationship is blessed by God. Until you acknowledge that it is a sin, you will not be able to make the obsession go away. You can think what you want and convince yourself of almost anything, but the Bible is clear. What you are contemplating doing is a sin, plain and simple, like it or not, take it or leave it! It is what it is. Its not that I fail to see it as a sin, its just I can't get rid of it. I don't want it. that is the problem. I have asked God on many an occasion to take it away, and for some reason its not going. I have nearly committed suicide on the reason that I felt like I couldn't get rid of it, because it was draining me. Before this I told God that I don't have any power over it, that I can't fight it anymore. I was not able to do it on my strength, that I needed His.


I mean, this is going to be a process--it will take a lot of work on your part but I think realizing that this is really seriously a sin is going to hit home for you and help convict you. God doesn't want this for you. AI is not an option and you need to let it go. The stumbling block for you is, you have the ability to exercise your will in this case. You can simply make an appointment, drive down to the clinic, and have the procedure done for a nominal fee, and you are on your way to realizing your dream. It may seem easy and inexpensive, but if its not God's will, God will not bless this choice you are making. There will be repercussions.

I understand that you want children. I really do understand that desperation and have contemplated AI myself (thinking, if I am not married by "X" age I will consider my options). I TOTALLY understand the thundering sound of your biological clock ticking in your ear. But let God work His will. He knows you want children. Will you give him a chance? And realize also that if something happens and you cant have your own children, you can always adopt. And if you are married at that time, you can maybe get an egg donor. In the meantime you can maybe look into freezing your eggs for future use (when you're married). There are a lot of options open to us in this day and age, that do align with Biblical principles. Finally, most importantly, don't forget Sarah. God gave her a child in old age, because God does not have "can't" in his vocabulary. God hasn't changed. God can do anything. God knows the desires of your heart and wants to give them to you. Do yourself a favor and try things God's way. :hug:I don't know whether God would bless this or not, I only wish that He would take it away. I truely don't know why God would allow this, unless it is a test of my faith. And what a test it is! I might explain more, but it will have to be in another post.

Thank you for replying, I do really appreciate it :kiss:

[Metalwolf]

Theres only one way to do this, and that is with Yahweh. If you put any trust in other methods you will fail every time. You would have to put it all on the line for the Lord. This means that you would also need to take the focus off of yourself and go help some other people, you would need to get out with others and fellowship and have some fun. When you sit around and stew all day on this, what are you doing? your focusing on yourself. Also if there is anything in your life that triggers this than get rid of it.

May the Lord be with you on your journeyThank you :kiss:
I have been trying to stay away from some of the triggers, but it ain't easy. There are some pregnant female shoppers who are regulars, and in each store that I worked at there had been a pregnant employee. There are none right now that are pregnant, but I recently found out my therapist who I had been seeing for this problem is pregnant! And there are no other therapist I can really get in the near future, as they are really limited in my case. She will go on maternity leave in about a month, and for a few months I won't have anyone until she comes back.

I am trying to give it to the Lord, but it is hard. On the bright side, during this trial He has actually shown me a big flaw in how I feel about Him and the Bible. It was not an issue about salvation, but that I didn't trust Him and that He meant the stuff He did in the Bible. And I know this trust is needed, because this underpins a lot of faith. I also realised just how depraved I was, that I could not save myself, that it was dependant all on Him. I don't know what else I will learn, but I imagine that it is in the future.

[Metalwolf]

I also want to thank Cheech and Sold Out, for your replies. I would reply to them in greater depth, but I don't know if people on here find triple posting to be annoying, but I will answer any questions if you have them :)