marraige in trouble

[forgiven84]

HI im brand new here and i really need some advice. i posted this in another forum and then realized it needed to be here.I am new to the whole forum thing and i am pretty much searching for advice. My husband and i are both new christians. We have been married for 6 yrs and found jesus about 2 yrs ago and my husband its been about a year. I feel that i am blessed in so many ways. we have 2 wonderful children that we are able to put through christian school and i am very thankful for so many things god has blessed us with. Unfortunately i have a terrible past with drug and sexual addictions, among other things. our marraige started off a little rocky. i got pregnant with my first child very shortly after we were engaged. i was 18. we have been through so many struggles with him drinking alcohol, me being a jealous wife and so on. we went through a separation about 8 months ago that lasted about 4 months. while we were separated he had temporary custody of the children and i felt like i would die without my family. i pretty much gave up on christ and everything else. i was unfaithful throughout the seperation after he filed for divorce. i was headed no where. i needed my family. well we were able to work things out and get back together and i have never felt closer to christ. but heres where the problem is... it seems like he is riding the fence. he has no interest in going to church or bible study with me and he is drinking again and im terrified. he wont talk to me and all i feel like i can do is pray. but i feel helpless. any time i try and talk to him about his actions he brings up my past and tells me im not one to talk. but i have changed. i have re-devoted my life to jesus christ and i feel like he doesnt have faith anymore. i don't feel strong enough to carry my family spiritually alone. i feel so much hurt inside when i see this. please help.
thanks and god bless

[Evangelist Smith]

Sister I read your prayer request and please know that I did lift you and your husband up in prayer.God bless and stay in prayer for him sister..dont give up time is short...keep praying for that husband ..amen amen

God bless you sis
Evang.dare

[unkerns]

I would recommend seing the movie "fireproof" together.

It kinda seems like when you learned about Christ that they left out one of the more important parts, when you accept Christ things will get alot harder, Satan attacks you even more. Your past is exactly that your past, it cant change, but if the Lord says that he forgives it and forgets it then you are a new creation in Christ.

I would also recommend reading 1 Corinthians 7 as the wife do your wifely duties and lead by example for him, Going to service on sundays really isnt that important, because thats not really real church anyways, real church is a bunch of believers gathered to gether talking about the Lord, having fun, singing, dancing, praising the Lord, eating together, etc.

Some other things you could try doing are reading the bible together, praying together, invite believers over for dinner(iron sharpens iron)

May the Lord be with you

[forgiven84]

thank you so much for taking the time to reply. i really appreciate it. and oh my goodness, has it got harder since becoming a christian, now satan has to work double time.

[jponb]

Dearest sister,
First, I would like to comment you for your decision to give your life to Christ. This is the most important thing we can do. Because you gave your life to Christ, rest assured that you are not alone. He is there with you. I know that it may not seem so sometimes; but He is there. Donnie McClurklin wrote a song that said, " I know that faith is easy when everything is going well; but can you still believe in Him when your life's a living Hell." Being a Christian does not mean our life will be all peachy; but during those times it is not, He is there with us. We have to trust Him. Now what does that mean to trust Him? It does not mean that He is necessarily going to work things out the way we want Him to; but whatever way He works them out we know He has a perfect plan and are in agreement with Him. As for your husband, continue to pray for him as will I; at the same time, continue to walk as Jesus would have you to walk before your husband. Maybe your example will lead him back. Lastly, study your bible. Faith comes by hearing the Word of God. Find a study group and begin to feed your spirit regularly. As we grow in faith and knowledge of Him, we will find that life's situations (however painful they may be) we are able to bare because He is there... He is there.

[ddmor]

Praise God that you're back together, but your marriage is far from healed. Would your husband be open to Christian marriage counseling?

Also, the above advice to pray for your husband is some of the best advice there is.

[unkerns]

I realize I kinda left a part out, there is a very bright side to the fact that Satan attacks twice as hard, Christ sent his helper into the world he takes your burden and makes it light and gives you the fruit of the spirit.

Love demands a sacrifice, sacrifice your wants and needs for the Lord

[Sold Out]

thank you so much for taking the time to reply. i really appreciate it. and oh my goodness, has it got harder since becoming a christian, now satan has to work double time.

I was 18 when I got married (pregnant). I brought a lot of baggage into marriage, and being that young was just a challenge in and of itself. Just be patient and let God work in your lives. Pray for your husband and love him, support him, be submissive. Your attitude will win him over. He will wonder why this woman is being so good to him? He will have to give credit to God.

BTW, we will celebrate 20 yrs of marriage next year. 3 beautiful children and a blessed life. Just because you are young doesn't mean you can't succeed. My husband loves the Lord and we faithfully serve Him together. In the beginning it wasn't that way. God is faithful.