I have tried the final thing and still no success.

[365_days_gone]

I installed a program called Covenant Eyes on my computer which blocks pornography which is great, but now I still struggle with masturbation. God I hate the shame of having to admit to this. Screw it, thats all.

[DaniHansen]

What final thing?

Honestly, I don't think pornography is ever the problem, I think it's simply a distraction.

Now that you've removed the distraction ... hopefully you can identify the problem.

[HankZ]

I installed a program called Covenant Eyes on my computer which blocks pornography which is great, but now I still struggle with masturbation. God I hate the shame of having to admit to this. Screw it, thats all.

There is a book(also on CD,) "Everyman's Battle." The author has a way of hitting the problem head on. He also gives 'real' suggestions that help.

There is another program that you can set up on your computer which will change your way of thinking. I can't remember the name of the program, but if you're interested I will try to find it. What it does is sends someone else every site you have visited. You can set it up to send your pastor, a friend, or your mom, the list of all sites you surfed as well as what content wass on your screen. That is the ultimate, to know your mom will be seeing what your looking at. The toughest part is mind is like a computer, what ever you down load, that is the program your mind will run. It takes a while to reprogram your thinking. If you have a church that you attend, talk to the pastor or one of the elders. Not only will they pray with you, they should be able to help you with some resources that are available. I am praying for your victory over this battle.

[365_days_gone]

Thats what the Convenant Eyes program does. I have it set up to send to 2 people. Sadly I havent heard from them for 2 weeks, even though their supposed to get an email of sites once a week.

[paradiseinn]

I installed a program called Covenant Eyes on my computer which blocks pornography which is great, but now I still struggle with masturbation. God I hate the shame of having to admit to this. Screw it, thats all.

Hey 365, I'm trying self control before I do something like that, It's tough man... I don't trust myself. Don't worry about admitting this stuff, me and tons of other people struggle with this... We are guys... It happens. I hate to admit it to. It's a serious problem with me. Hang in there!

[HisLeast]

After 10 years of battling this addiction I finally went to a therapist. After trying every traffic scanner, site blocker, and "accountability" software out there, after hundreds of solemn and heartfelt prayer sessions, after a myriad of broken promises to myself and to God, and practically anything I've ever heard or been advised to do.... it was 8 words from a therapist that finally set me on the road to recovery.

Me: "I want to be done with pornography. Finished. I won't touch it ever again"
Therapist: "So where is that energy going to go?"

And suddenly it clicked. My temptation always acted like a static-electric charge. And sooner or later the charge gets so great that it MUST GET TO GROUND. Yes, I had to take the porn away, but what happens to the charge? There's still something wrong with me. There's still a charge building. Now let me ask you this... have you ever had a porn session where it feels like your conscious, responsible, decision making self "shut off" even though you desperately wanted to remain righteous and free from temptation? Isn't it funny how we can have two opposed dynamics in our minds, and one can 'shut off' the other, despite what we honestly, truly, and devoutly want for ourselves?

Now here's a kicker. The dynamic that's driving you to the porn MAY NOT BE WRONG... it is however, latched onto something deadly to get what it thinks it wants. For whatever reason your mind is building an urge that it has tied powerfully to porn and lust. If you want to be free of the temptation, you've got to figure out what your triggers are, what motivates and fuels the desire, and how you got to the point where porn became the medication. (helpful hint: it may have nothing at all to do with sex)

This will require you to pay very close attention to yourself, asking yourself questions you might not want the answers to, and discovering truths about yourself that you'd normally deny. Its the single toughest experience in my life, but ultimately the only thing that has helped me overcome.

Covenant Eyes is not the final barrier. Its simply the last of the barriers that address the supply side of the equation while ignoring the demand side.

[Gregg]

I installed a program called Covenant Eyes on my computer which blocks pornography which is great, but now I still struggle with masturbation. God I hate the shame of having to admit to this. Screw it, thats all.

What triggers the urge? Stress? Inappropriate thoughts? Anger? Or maybe just bad habit?

Let's start with a basic. Why do you want to stop? This is not a flippent question. It is important for all who want recovery from addiction to know why they want to stop something.

[Gregg]

After 10 years of battling this addiction I finally went to a therapist. After trying every traffic scanner, site blocker, and "accountability" software out there, after hundreds of solemn and heartfelt prayer sessions, after a myriad of broken promises to myself and to God, and practically anything I've ever heard or been advised to do.... it was 8 words from a therapist that finally set me on the road to recovery.

Me: "I want to be done with pornography. Finished. I won't touch it ever again"
Therapist: "So where is that energy going to go?"

And suddenly it clicked. My temptation always acted like a static-electric charge. And sooner or later the charge gets so great that it MUST GET TO GROUND. Yes, I had to take the porn away, but what happens to the charge? There's still something wrong with me. There's still a charge building.

For whatever reason your mind is building an urge that it has tied powerfully to porn and lust. If you want to be free of the temptation, you've got to figure out what your triggers are, and how you got to the point where porn became the medication.

This will require you to pay very close attention to yourself, asking yourself questions you might not want the answers to, and discovering truths about yourself that you'd normally deny. Its the single toughest experience in my life, but ultimately the only thing that has helped me overcome.

Wow, I was typing mine and was blessed to read this after I posted. I like it when that happens!

[Forgiven Alaskan]

yeah you can't find wholeness if you don't know what needs fixing. Masturbation is not the problem, that is how you cope. There is something else that needs to be dealt with. Many men masturbate and act out fantasises in their mind that seem fullfilling but really aren't, and never actually could be that fullfilling in real life.

Primarily look to Jesus to fullfill you when you want to masturbate, not masturbation. This is not some mystical sensation, but in your mind, honestly pray and think on him during these times, especially. If you can't do that then ask yourself why you can't trust God enough.

I find myself doing that alot. As if God can't handle it or doesn't want to hear it. What a lie from Satan we are being led to believe!

There is no shame in admitting this at all! Why shouldn't we able to share about the most important problems in our lives? This is where superficiality comes in. If we can't share about such things with others, or at least feel we can't, that is going to affect how open we are with God. We may be afraid of sharing such things with others, but there is no reason to fear sharing with God. And fear is not of God anyway. If another Christian man can't handle the fact that you struggle with masturbation (and I think over 90% of men struggle alone anyway) then the problem is with him and not you.

Sin thrives in the dark and hides from the light. When you bring your sin to light, it is diminished. This happens by sharing with others. You have to be able to be open with God of course, but with others is also a key. Otherwise what kind of body is the church going to be like? I guess this is my problem with the modern church today and this is what makes it superficial. It was never meant to be that way!! People are getting more thin skinned and really need to shake off that fear of rejection that they fear they ultimatly will receive if they open up to others and be real.

Ok, I think I'm off my soapbox now...

[livingwaters]

:pray:Praying for the Lord to renew your mind each and every day!!! HE CAN DO IT!!!!!

BELIEVE AND RECEIVE WHAT YOU PRAY FOR!!! ALLELUIA....ALLELUIA:pp:pp

God bless:hug:

[acceby]

I totally agree.

I've been struggling with the problem too--actually since I was a child. Imagine trying to break a habit you've had for the last 80% of your life and you'll be about where I am.

Since I was just a kid I would pray for God to take away these desires. The problem was that it had taken me over so fully that stopping it would leave a vacuum in my life--and we know how much nature just adores those things. Of course, I would get sucked right back into it.

I tried filling my mind with God, but my faith was never strong enough. It was a vicious cycle---having the desires made me feel far from God, which would make me weaker, which would make the desires stronger, and so on.


However, I've recently comet to somewhat of a better understanding about what's wrong with my life.

A few weeks ago I and a large bunch of my Christian friends went travelling together. We had almost NILCH privacy, and so of course I didn't masturbate once. However, what SHOCKED me was that not only did I not actually perform the act--I didn't even feel the compulsion anymore. It wasn't like I was supressing it--it was gone.


What that made me realize was that this addiction was filling a void in my life. I was lonely and in need of Christian fellowhip, and as soon as I filled it with something God-glorifying and better, the desire for the second-best thing faded away. Simply put, I was lonely and bored, and I was using sexual sin as an outlet for my feelings of unfulfillment and frustration.


The Covenant eyes mentioned earlier is an accountability for your internet surfing habits....and I realized that I needed something like that for my life. Thus, I am planning on moving from my single-living situation (which I chose because I was afraid of the humiliation of people finding out about my struggle) to a roommate situation with some of my Christian friends. There are certain people that, when you hang out with them, bring out the best in you and suppress the worst--and God has blessed me with people like that.


I'm really hoping that the constant fellowship and human interaction will bring me closer to God... and farther from the one thing that has been the greatest barrier in my relationship with Him.