Husband leaving his faith in God, Church & the Bible.

[trilliant]

Hello,
I am new to this forum but have been reading some of the previous posts. I need somewhere to talk about my situation with people who understand. My husband and I met at Bible college and have been married almost 11 years. We have two young sons with autism. My husband never wanted kids but I married him and had kids with him anyway. It has been the source of a major divide between us for the last 6 years. We have been to marriage counseling over that issue. In addition he regularly views porn and has never felt that this is wrong. He hides it from me on the computer but I know how to find things and know he looks on a regular basis. So now on top of everything he decides to renounce his faith. He doesn't believe God exists and that Christianity is "bunk". I knew he didn't want kids but still married him and I have suffered the consequences of that choice knowing that I have only myself to blame. But this, deciding he's "done" with Christianity...this I didn't sign up for. I feel so ripped off. I married a Godly man (at least I thought he was) and we got our degrees in Biblical studies and often talked of going into missions one day and now he's just done. I'm angry and hurt all at the same time. Not at God but at him and at myself for marrying him. I just feel so trapped and alone. It's enough that I am alone in parenting but now I have to be alone in my faith. Although really, I've been alone in my faith for a while but now official.

Thanks for reading this post.

[kricaud]

Hi

It helps to know that you are not alone. It is very frustrating to marry someone who is a Christian and have that person's faith falter and fail. I will pray for strength and forgiveness for you towards your husband and I will pray for your husband to be filled with the strength of the Holy Spirit again.

A book that I read that really helped me was "How to pray for lost loved ones" by Dutch Sheets. I felt that it helped me with more specific tools in my prayers for my husband.

This bible verse has been a great reminder to me Matthew 11:28 and Jesus said "come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest." It is hard to let go of the human need to control and be angry, but it is much easier when you turn it all over to Jesus. He loves you and He loves your husband, so pray in all matters.

I hope this gives you some comfort in knowing that unfortunately, you are not alone in your struggles.

[livingwaters]

God usually comes through when we think that's the end!!!! Don't give up on HIM, HE never gave up on you!!!! Your husband will have to answer for every thing that satan has tricked him with. The Word is very strong about turning your back on God. I think it says something to the effect of, you would have been better off with a millstone around your neck and cast into the sea.....that's pretty strong....sin will use any and every excuse not to succomb to the light of Christ. Pray, pray, pray.....decree what the Word tells you. For example: satan has to pay back seven times more that what has stolen from you....decree what the Word says...It is written: If God be for me, who can be against me...It is written: no weapon formed against me shall prosper.....read the Word. Search for the promises God has made to each and every one of us that are born again Christians. Jesus gave us the power to cast out demons, to do signs and wonders....do you have Faith the size of a mustard see.

And most of all::: DO NOT speak negative and give satan the tools to work with.....speak the Word and the Word alone......play Christian music, play Christian tv, play Christian cds in the car.....sing a new song unto the Lord.....praise HIM at all times, no matter what it looks like.....sing, sing, praise, praise, thanksgiving, thanksgiving......ok, now I'm serious!!!!!!!!!:pp:pp:pp:saint::saint:

[decrumpit]

Hello,
I am new to this forum but have been reading some of the previous posts. I need somewhere to talk about my situation with people who understand. My husband and I met at Bible college and have been married almost 11 years. We have two young sons with autism. My husband never wanted kids but I married him and had kids with him anyway. It has been the source of a major divide between us for the last 6 years. We have been to marriage counseling over that issue. In addition he regularly views porn and has never felt that this is wrong. He hides it from me on the computer but I know how to find things and know he looks on a regular basis. So now on top of everything he decides to renounce his faith. He doesn't believe God exists and that Christianity is "bunk". I knew he didn't want kids but still married him and I have suffered the consequences of that choice knowing that I have only myself to blame. But this, deciding he's "done" with Christianity...this I didn't sign up for. I feel so ripped off. I married a Godly man (at least I thought he was) and we got our degrees in Biblical studies and often talked of going into missions one day and now he's just done. I'm angry and hurt all at the same time. Not at God but at him and at myself for marrying him. I just feel so trapped and alone. It's enough that I am alone in parenting but now I have to be alone in my faith. Although really, I've been alone in my faith for a while but now official.

Thanks for reading this post.


Never lose hope. Even the bitterest of people can turn around. It sounds like hes bitter. Perhaps he just needs some time and love.

[Followtheway]

stay a biblical wife and also a good movie for the 2 of you to see is fireproof

[Surf]

===============

[paimiuwu]

I so understand what you are going through and that feeling that you were "ripped off" in marriage. My husband is the same. He still goes to church, but lives an absolutely unchristian life. He often brags of his faith, yet he posted himself on many internet dating sites. He calls me unimaginable names and has now moved out. I have asked for counseling for 2 yrs and he has refused. Now, he says he will go, but I do not believe he will follow through and attend with me. He is even living with another woman and won't tell me where he is living. He talks about how xtian he is, yet feels no remorse on doing anything of these things. I suffer so much in silence. None of my family knows anything about this. Sometimes it is hard to keep the faith, but I try hard. Just sometimes I feel I am being hit with so many things that it is impossible to bear.

[The-Innkeeper]

As I read your post I was pleased to see you notice your fault in marrying him in the first place knowing full well he was against having children. That is a good sign sis. I will go so far as to say I believe his actions are a reaction to you ignoring his lack of desire for children in retaliation. The next thing I wish to say is this: Just because you attend a bible college, it does not make you a bible believer. I might be out on a limb here sis but I bet you two got married pretty soon after meeting in college right? In any case that is not the point. I wish to share a scripture with you :
And unto the married I command, yet not I, but the Lord, Let not the wife depart from her husband: But and if she depart, let her remain unmarried, or be reconciled to her husband: and let not the husband put away his wife. But to the rest speak I, not the Lord: If any brother hath a wife that believeth not, and she be pleased to dwell with him, let him not put her away. And the woman which hath an husband that believeth not, and if he be pleased to dwell with her, let her not leave him. For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean; but now are they holy. But if the unbelieving depart, let him depart. A brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases: but God hath called us to peace. For what knowest thou, O wife, whether thou shalt save thy husband? or how knowest thou, O man, whether thou shalt save thy wife?
(1Co 7:10-16 KJVR)
If your husband is so against God and he desires to leave - let him. I am not saying to stop loving him I am saying at times like this a man needs a bit of purging. Now that that is over I can get to the heart of the matter and that is YOU - NOT HIM! Too many want to find way to explain others behaviours instead of examining their own (I am not saying you are not - I think you are and is why I address it). I can not advise him because he is not here. Here is some thing I wish to ask: Did you marry him for better OR worse? If so why does the worse suprise you? Understand? I am not saying it is easy - it's not. However you made a covenant with God in Marriage to love your husband unconditionally. Never forget sis - Hurt people HURT PEOPLE! Your husband is running! He is running from his own failour to heed to call on his life. He is excuseing his actions to show forth how bad he can be in hopes God will let him off the hook. Trust me sister (or not lol) if your husband ever really knew Christ - Jesus knows full well how to bring him to his knees. Now to you once again ( yes I am long winded) You said you feel cheated or ripped off. Ummmm - how so? Did you marry him knowing he would never fail? Did you enter into this marriage knowing your husband had issues unresolved? Oh the 20/20 hind site huh. This issue is deeper then just about your husband leaving the faith. Personally I doubt he has left it - I believe he feels as if it has left him.You have not been ripped off you are being prunned. I know it hurts sis. I have been married three times to so called godly woman so I am here to tell you I know what it is to hurt. My wife now is an awesome wife. I am a real pain in the butt yet she holds me in high regard. Not because I deserve it but because God does. That however is another lesson. Be of good cheer sister. Wether he leaves or stays - be encouraged in knowing God has you and him right where He wants you both.

[72Michael72]

I don't have any special knowledge but I'll give you my opinion.

Do you love him? To me, it seems like this is the most important issue here. If you love him, then what does it matter what he believes? Isn't Christian love a love strong enough to overlook a person's sins? And If you don't love him, were you ever truly married to him in the first place?

I suggest that you pray to God until you're filled with love, and when you feel like this, you'll have a clearer insight into the problem.

[Reynolds357]

Hello,
I am new to this forum but have been reading some of the previous posts. I need somewhere to talk about my situation with people who understand. My husband and I met at Bible college and have been married almost 11 years. We have two young sons with autism. My husband never wanted kids but I married him and had kids with him anyway. It has been the source of a major divide between us for the last 6 years. We have been to marriage counseling over that issue. In addition he regularly views porn and has never felt that this is wrong. He hides it from me on the computer but I know how to find things and know he looks on a regular basis. So now on top of everything he decides to renounce his faith. He doesn't believe God exists and that Christianity is "bunk". I knew he didn't want kids but still married him and I have suffered the consequences of that choice knowing that I have only myself to blame. But this, deciding he's "done" with Christianity...this I didn't sign up for. I feel so ripped off. I married a Godly man (at least I thought he was) and we got our degrees in Biblical studies and often talked of going into missions one day and now he's just done. I'm angry and hurt all at the same time. Not at God but at him and at myself for marrying him. I just feel so trapped and alone. It's enough that I am alone in parenting but now I have to be alone in my faith. Although really, I've been alone in my faith for a while but now official.

Thanks for reading this post.

Usually regression this severe is a result of demonic attack.

[GreekAsianPanda]

First of all, don't give up your faith...EVER. Ok, that was really stupid of me to say, but...uh...I'm not good at this giving advice thing. :blushsad:
My best advice, though, is to surround yourself with Christian friends and other Christian family members, and go to church. I'm sure you already do this but that's my best advice. Teach your boys to be Christian and never let your husband bring you down!
I hope everything works out for you and I hope my advice isn't too bad, haha.
God bless you! :hug:

[Lordistruth]

Usually regression this severe is a result of demonic attack.

For real? I don't think we should make jokes at this woman's marriage's expense