He Saved Me and keeps Me, Empowered Me and Uses Me

[fennywest]

My Testimony (New Birth)Jn5:24,2Cor5:17


Once a self- righteous man, religious but devoid of a relationship with God, I thought I did not need what I regarded as “the religious stuff.” I was Ok as far as I was concerned. After all I considered my family upbringing as Christian. We were encouraged to go to church and I had a grand father who rallied us round his feet to pray in the morning and evening after singing and reading the Bible. What more credential did I need? To add to this, I lived a relatively modest life avoiding smoking or drinking to excess.

After a while, I sought acquisition of knowledge and turned my back on the Church. Well, I visited on occasion during Easter and Christmas to clear my conscience that I was not a pagan, but that was all. I lived for myself. I saw true, practising Christians as fanatics and did not want to have anything to do with their brand of Christianity. I was lost in my world and in the world. Soon I let go every rules or limitation and ‘enjoyed’ sin- deceiving myself. I never knew that if I died then I would have headed straight for hell.
Friend did you know that once I went to a Church called Saint Saviour but I was not saved? Did you know that on another occasion I attended Christ Army Church but I was not a soldier of Christ, but rather an enemy of God? Years later when I moved to another city, I attended Saint Cyprian’s but I was a league sinner and anything but a saint. I was sincere but sincerely wrong in my thinking.

But God in His mercy opened my eyes to see my need for Him and His Son, Jesus Christ. And in 1981, (August 24), I came to know Christ in a personal way and had a New Beginning.

How did it happen? Good question. I was homeless following a decision of our landlord to sell his house. A friend was kind to offer me a place to sleep but that offer was short-lived and I had to move to another friend within two weeks. It was agonising, humbling and horrible. After about two week’s stay in this friends house he received news that his sister was coming from abroad to visit so he told me I had to look for a place to stay and could come back after she had left. I was devastated. I desperately went to the council to see if they could help but it was hopeless. I was not one of those in their priority because I was single. I went home disgusted and disappointed and started scouting for a room to rent. I went all over London, hopping from bus to bus for days but found no place until after a few days I found this place that was hardly inhabitable, under repair but up for renting! The owner of the house had a shop on the ground floor. All other rooms were in similar dilapidated state and smelling; mine was not much different but I was desperate and accepted the place.

A few days later I met with a beautiful girl I had encountered abroad some four years back. She had She was just arrived the country and as we got talking she gave me the impression that she was stranded and desperate for a place to stay. My heart went out to her but I knew I was not in a position to help. Yet there was a debate within me and after much struggle, I made an offer in great trepidation. Surprising she accepted to stay with me.She said she only had a few days left. I apologised profusely for the state of the house. Its bathroom had no door; there was no shower, I used bucket for my bath. There was no drainage, so the water from the bath ran down the stairs. And it was not free!

We slept on the same bed and I assumed that we would have sex but when I made the move she refused, to my dismay. I insisted but as we struggled I found a Bible under her pillow! I was disappointed and flabbergasted to say the least. I wondered why she would do that. Then I thought, perhaps it was to protect her from me- the evil one. I discovered she was a professing Christian. But I thought I was one too and that having sex before marriage was no big deal. Needless to say, I was completely disarmed, paralysed all night long as I thought about that Bible under the pillow. I became ashamed of myself.

After a few days, she left and I was on my own again. And one night in my sleep, I was confronted with my sinful nature. The three parts of me were characters in a drama that was to unfold.
My Spirit was in the dock- quizzed: ‘Are you a child of God?’
My mind stood up as my barrister, defending me, ‘’Of course you are! You have been baptized; you read your Bible when you feel like it; sing religious songs from time to time; you have fasted and prayed before; you attend the Church on occasion- especially Easter and Christmas.’ You must be Ok.
I justified my self.

But moments later, like viewing a movie on wide plasma screen I saw and recollected all the evil things I had done- having sex outside of marriage, cheating, rage, rebelling against God. It was difficult to reconcile the double life I was leading, and I broke down in tears in that room; (my body was partaking in the courtroom drama as I acknowledged that I was not right with God and needed a Saviour).

Remembering my recent August visitor who was clearly godlier than I was, I surrendered myself to God. And when I did, it was like a big burden or boulder had been rolled off me. I felt brand new. Something had happened inside of me. It was difficult to put a label to it but I knew I would never be the same again.

That was the beginning of my Christian walk. I saw my friend who had housed me recently who was a Christian, and somehow he new something had happened to me. I told him my story and we rejoiced together.

I went back to the council ( government Housing Authority) to tell to see if they could help me with a house, I was allowed to fill some forms this time. And within a few days I received a letter saying they had offered me a place. I was over the moon. This was a miracle to me because I was there a few weeks ago and was told there was no hope for me, now here I was signing a contract for a one-bedroom flat. I knew it was the hand of God- a sign that He was now in charge of my destiny.

Soon I moved in with my Christian friend and began to grow in Christ as we had bible studies together and I started attending a church very close to my house. This was the beginning of my Christian journey.

It is different for different people. Religion does not save anyone. Christianity is not about praying, going to Church, singing Christian songs or performing ceremonies like baptism. It is a relationship with the loving and Living God through Jesus Christ. There is nothing in our lives or achievements that can recommend us to God. No matter how good you think you are, you still need Christ. The word of God says ‘all our righteousness is just like menstrual cloths before God.

’All have sinned and come short of the glory of God.’ ‘If we say we do not have sin, we make him a lair and the truth is not in us. but if we confess our sin, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness. (Rom 3:23. 1John1:7-9)

We ALL must judge our past like I did, like Paul did, and like many millions upon millions have done over the years, to be saved. Only the righteousness of God through Christ counts. You and I must regard our righteousness like dung, rubbish, if we are to receive forgiveness of sin, pardon, and absolution in the bar of God. Jesus is the only advocate, Redeemer, and Saviour. Only His blood washes away sin. He came to save those who are lost, hopeless, blind, slaves to sin and self. There must come a time when you and I must acknowledge this truth and surrender to Him. That is when true life begins.