An interesting insight came to me this morning.
I've been thinking that after the initial "rush" of coming back to God wears off it's very easy to get caught up in the ways of the world. The little things that we'd all prefer not to find ourselves doing start to creep back in (for myself it's often hard to maintain grace, patience etc on a jam-packed commuter train every day)
I've often caught myself thinking that it would be so much easier to follow, to be more overtly Christian and so on, if only I could get rid of these tendencies. It's easy to think that any public statements are too easily compromised by being less than perfect.
Today it was as if God was telling me to just go for it, to focus on walking with him rather than worrying about whether every little thing was perfect before starting out. If I'm spending my time feeling bogged down by the ways I'm not perfect, caught up with feelings of guilt every time I trip up, I'm always looking backwards rather than looking forwards.
In a physical battle the warrior waits until he is victorious before cleaning his sword - if he stopped to polish it repeatedly during the battle he would soon fall. The spiritual battle is no different.