Court coming up -- nervous

[Equipped_4_Love]

Hi all;

Next week I have a court date for mediation with my husband (soon-to-be ex). This will be the first time I have seen him since he took my beautiful and precious daughter out of the country behind my back and set up residence in another state. This past year has been one of the hardest of my life. I have had absolutely no contact with her, and had no idea if she was even okay.

It's only by the grace of God that his wife (yes....the one he married while he and I were still married/separated) tracked me down and E-Mailed me, telling me where he lives. Anyhow, I was able to serve him, and this next week will be the first time I have seen him inover a year.

I am a pretty strong person, but even so, I get so intimidated by him. I just know he is going to try and paint me as a completely unfit mother, mentally unbalanced, and get me completely revoked from her life....even though I have been working at the same job for almost 7 years and have been stable since the separation, part of me is just expecting the worst. I am just so afraid he's going to con his mom into hiring some high-priced lawyer again, and he will have the upper-hand...AGAIN. The last time we were in court, he made me look like a complete mental case, used my manic depression against me, and basically got my visitation rights taken away.

This separation from my daughter has been some of the most intolerable pain that I have ever been through, and there isn't a day that goes by that I do not think about her, and wish I could talk to her. I am just so afraid that I am going to go to court and he is going to make me look like a completly horrible mom....even though he is the one who took her out of the country without telling me, and went into court about 3 years ago behind my back and tried to get my maternal rights taken away, by completely lying to the judge.

Anyhow, this is the situation in a nutshell. PLEASE pray for me in this, as I am trying with everything in me not to worry, but to put it in God's hands.

Thank you

[moonglow]

Wow..I had no idea you had a child. How old is she? Do you have a lawyer? You can bet I will be praying for you! I pray this judge tosses him in jail too...I don't see how what he did be legal at all... I am so so sorry you have had to endure this..I couldn't image not being able to see my son for a year.

May the Lord watch over you and calm you and give you the steady heart and mind and strength you need to get through this...and most of all..give you peace as you go through this storm.

In Jesus Name I pray
Amen.

I want you to do this...sounds a little flaky but it helps me in difficult situation. Image Jesus walking next to you as you go to the court room...image Him sitting with you...standing by your side when you stand. Image His comforting hand on your shoulder when you speak. And truly...He is there.

God bless

[Equipped_4_Love]

That's awesome, moonglow. I hadn't even thought of that. Thank you.

It's been hard, for sure. I have concrete evidence on paper that shows that he bold-faced lied to the judge last time he was in court, by telling him that he didn't know where I was, when he knew exactly where I was. I am hoping that this will upset the judge enough to give me a real advantage.

I do not have an attorney. Can't afford one.

As far as what he did being illegal, I'm not sure. Anyone out there familiar with family law know for sure? Isn't purjury illegal?

[Firefighter]

Perjury is in fact illegal.

Prayin' for you Sis.

[daughter]

Praying for a speedy result, and your daughter to be returned to you. Thank God that his new wife had the sense to contact you.

[Vhayes]

Beautiful advice from Moonglow. And yes, I will be praying for you as well.
V

[moonglow]

That's awesome, moonglow. I hadn't even thought of that. Thank you.

It's been hard, for sure. I have concrete evidence on paper that shows that he bold-faced lied to the judge last time he was in court, by telling him that he didn't know where I was, when he knew exactly where I was. I am hoping that this will upset the judge enough to give me a real advantage.

I do not have an attorney. Can't afford one.

As far as what he did being illegal, I'm not sure. Anyone out there familiar with family law know for sure? Isn't purjury illegal?

Most towns have what is called legal aide for low income...something you might still want to check into if you don't get right to visitation to your daughter back. They go by a sliding scale and depending on your income, you might not be charged at all.

First its illegal to be married to two different women at the same time...more then likely his second marriage isn't going to be considered legal at all...in other words through the laws eyes, they aren't married. Second yes lying to a judge is illegal too. Sneaking your daughter out of state where you can't even find her I would think would be illegal too.

I was praying for you last night and I kind of wonder if he will even show up in court because he has done alot of bad things here that I don't think even a high price lawyer could get him out of...

Since he got the judge to stop your visitation rights to her..did he get your parental rights cut off completely? If he didn't...you still have rights as a parent. You really need to get a lawyer. I would check your local phone book or google legal aide for your town or city and see what you can find out.

I will be thinking about you today and holding you in my prayers!

God bless

[miepie]

We will pray for you too here..... what day are you going to court? Is it in the morning or afternoon?

Love you lots,
Mieke

[miepie]

PS If you get visitation rights, I'll make a nice card for your daughter and you can write something nice in there for her......

[Equipped_4_Love]

Most towns have what is called legal aide for low income...something you might still want to check into if you don't get right to visitation to your daughter back. They go by a sliding scale and depending on your income, you might not be charged at all.

First its illegal to be married to two different women at the same time...more then likely his second marriage isn't going to be considered legal at all...in other words through the laws eyes, they aren't married. Second yes lying to a judge is illegal too. Sneaking your daughter out of state where you can't even find her I would think would be illegal too.

I was praying for you last night and I kind of wonder if he will even show up in court because he has done alot of bad things here that I don't think even a high price lawyer could get him out of...

Since he got the judge to stop your visitation rights to her..did he get your parental rights cut off completely? If he didn't...you still have rights as a parent. You really need to get a lawyer. I would check your local phone book or google legal aide for your town or city and see what you can find out.

I will be thinking about you today and holding you in my prayers!

God bless

Hi, Moonglow;

Getting an attorney is simply out-of-the-question. Looked into it numerous times.....too expensive. There's no way.

I already went through legal aid. That is how I got all the paperwork done and everything. Now all I need to do is show up to court.

Thanks for the responses, everyone...and the prayers.

[Equipped_4_Love]

Perjury is in fact illegal.

Prayin' for you Sis.

That's what I thought

[Dani H]

You have to present facts.

Facts that your emotional and mental state is under control (maybe a doctor's note?).

Facts that your husband removed your child across state lines without you knowing about it (that's illegal if there is an open court case in the state that has to do with custody).

Can you prove that he is a bigamist?

Can you prove that he is a perjurer? It's not about what you know. It's about what you can prove in court. It's not about getting an emotional reaction out of a judge, it's about what you can prove and what you can't and where he actually committed illegal actions that you can use to prove that what he is doing is not in the best interest of your daughter.

You can do your own research about custody laws in your state through the Internet and checking your county's clerk of courts web site. That's what you would pay a lawyer for. To do the research for you and to tell you what's presentable in court and what isn't. The people who win court cases are usually the ones that are the best prepared and can show the facts, not according to subjective feelings of right and wrong, but according to their state's ordinances and statutes. Show what qualifies you for visitation and a say-so in custodial matters by digging up your state's statutes and then telling the judge how they apply to your situation.

You got a week. Go research.

[moonglow]

Hi, Moonglow;

Getting an attorney is simply out-of-the-question. Looked into it numerous times.....too expensive. There's no way.

I already went through legal aid. That is how I got all the paperwork done and everything. Now all I need to do is show up to court.

Thanks for the responses, everyone...and the prayers.

Ok I am glad legal aide was able to help you...but I guess I am surprised they don't have lawyers there to help out people that can't afford a lawyer...I thought that was part of what they did.

Anyway..for some reason I had it in my head you were going to court today.. So I was anxiously waiting to see how it turned out. Then I reread your post..and saw I somehow missed the next week part.. Anyway I am very relieved about that actually...cause you need to give us time to pray for you!

God bless

[JesusMySavior]

You've got the best Judge in the world on your side. You've also got the best Advocate on your side. You've also got a jury on your side.

You've got people praying for you, you've got angels on your side who have witnessed everything, and you've got God and Jesus.


Pray, and then take Dani's advice and then pray, pray, pray again.

[Equipped_4_Love]

Ok I am glad legal aide was able to help you...but I guess I am surprised they don't have lawyers there to help out people that can't afford a lawyer...I thought that was part of what they did.

God bless

Yes, but even so, lawyers don't work for free. Even a low-cost one is more than I can afford right now.