I'm going to put this warning out there, if you believe in Christ Jesus and you have the gift of the Holy spirit within but are afraid of tribulation and persecution or involved with wordly things and riches, you better wip into shape because if you dont start doing the commandments of God and tell the people of the world about Jesus the Christ your going to be there.
The worker that takes the money and keeps it to himself, shall himself have what was given taken from him and he will be cast into the darkness and there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth.
This goes for myself especially, i have never been baptized, but that is no excuse, so if you read this and seriously are striken to the heart im pleading with you now, pray hard and do the works of Christ.
So please everyone pray also for me and i as well for you that we may do that which is commanded by God and love God and all others as we love ourselves.
*i put this in prayer because i need prayer, but im also not going to let this message be passed up on the people i love....if anyone wants to pm about anything, questions, anything, please do so*
"May we not be ashamed of Christ Jesus and fear nothing in His name, may He take us from the world and cast its treasure from us, that we may see Him and do that which He has commanded"
"May I not be ashamed of Christ Jesus and fear nothing in His name, may He take me from the world and cast my treasure's from me, that I may see Him and do that with He has commanded"
Please pray, i dont want to be ashamed or fear or value my treasures here in this world, I dont want to sin ever again. I beleive Jesus is the Christ but i dont feel the spirit, i dont know it.
I understand scriptures i read it an i know what it says but i cant do anything it says i should be able to do with the Holy spirit. Demons and miracles and knowing the heart in people i dont see or do or feel these things, i understand scripture...more and more i read and know exactly what it saying but is that really different than knowing Jesus is the Christ?
I know im not a seed on the wayside, I know i have infact %100 been a seed in the stone at times, i do fear what to say to them about Jesus because im afraid of saying something wrong, but if someone said i will kill you if you say you beleive in Jesus or i will beat you up or something, thats actually delightful to me, but i feel sad for them.
As for wordly riches, i could care less really, i have 5$ to my name, i live in a house i dont pay for and if i need to sell everything i have i will, i just dont see the need for it.
I have honestly felt over the last day or so i should just sell everything, leave the house and just walk outside and start preaching to people, but today after prayer I dont think im capable of doing that yet because i prayed and the weirdest thing happened.
"i prayed to God that i would have the courage to do what He commands of me"
Then i had a knock on my door and an older women was there and clearly afraid, she was stuttering and stuff, she said "Can you help me, thee is a dog that is out on the road, i dont like it it has bitten me before, all i want to do is walk home"
She holds the stop sign for the kids at the local public school.
So without thought i said sure, put on just my shoes and a toque cause i look like einstien at that time and walk out in my tshirt and start walking her down the street.
Bout 100 yards.
So as were walking shes telling me about the dog and how shes afraid of it
And i tell her "Dont worry about it, the dog is just fearul (Genesis *God put the fear of man in animals) and that exactly what im thinking as i tell her this.
So the dog at this point starts charging and what pops into my head "Does this dog have a demon?" i have no idea if there is or isnt, could just be a weird dog, didnt look any different and i had nothing to give me the impression it was, so i think "perhaps i should command that if there is a demon that it leave the dog, but at the same time im thinking but i have no idea if it does or doesnt"
So instead of originally commanding it out if it was there, with authority, i quietly say "I command you in the name of the Lord Jesus to come out"
At this point the dog had already ran a good distance from me and hid in the back of a driveway for about 4 seconds and then came back.
During all this time we had been walking so im at the point where i did what she ask's
She yells t the house where the owners are and says "I've asked you several time please keep the dog leashed im afraid of it when i walk home each day"
I reply "Dont be afraid of the dog, if your ever afraid knock on my door, I will help you"
So she thanks me again in several different words as shes walking off and i head back home.
When i get back home i sit down and think "man, why didnt i talk to her about Jesus", it didnt even pop into my head at all to do so, im pretty sure she attends a Catholic church in the town and has for a long time, but still why would it not even come to mind to mention the Lord through all of that?
So like i said, ive been thinking of selling everything (paying my debts *bills* and leaving the house im in (my dad owns and i havent paid rent in maybe half a year or more because i for whatever reason cant seem to get a job in mining even though i have crazy experience) and just walking around town and telling people about Christ.
But then that event came up and now im questioning if im even prepared to bring people to Jesus and not push them away.
I have not been baptized, im not sure in scripture if it matters if your baptized or not, i know it matters if your baptized with the Holy Spirit, but should i be baptized by an actual man of God, with water?
If so, please pray also that, that person comes because I do not know any that i feel is really in it for Christ.
So yeah thats my story right now, if you went this far thank you.
I know i post alot recently on this board and i honestly know Jesus is the Christ and i have told people, but ive also been afraid at times.
And what i have posted is true, i know this because i dont have a teacher, i dont consult anyone about scripture save on this forum, i discuss it with members and i understand exactly what i read and i am 100 confident in what the Word says to me and what i have shared with you.
I beleive i have confirmed this through the Word.
So i just cant get past this part of not feeling the Power God promised, why do i not know the demons, why can i not heal people, why am i not physically healed myself even though i believe Jesus is the Christ(im paritally deaf,hard for me to hear some sound volume) why do i not know the thoughts before they reveal them, God told me that that is what His people with the Spirit can do, why can i not do them?
So pray for me, i pray alot for everyone, this is the first time ive ever asked anyone to really pray for me.
Everyone that knows me knows i believe in Jesus, ive told them all, but i do nothing for them, none are saved, the only person who I ever talked to about Jesus and believed was a person on here who after much discussion with me and a few other people several years back died a short time later at thier workplace.
I dont know what to do anymore, i dont want to be afraid, I want to know exactly what to do in every situation.
I dont want to do things and not capitalize on every opportunity to sow a seed, i dont want my thoughts to be blank in situations where i dont even think of how i could share the Lord, its not that i dont want to its that it just doesnt come up and those that i have shared Him with is everyone i deal with on a regular basis.
So i associate that with perhaps unconciously im afraid so i dont even think of how can i tell this person about Christ.
This is huge and im sorry it is, but ya this is my heart on a platter for all.
I dont pray like this, with all these words, i only pray for the most part the prayer He told me to pray.
So if i said the prayer simply to you guys its not like you'd understand so i just spilt my heart out as it is right now and i apologize its so long.
May the blessings of the Lord bring forth the fruits to His Glory.