This to be all in fun of course.
(Futurist prospective in red)
Now as He sat on the Mount of Olives, the disciples came to Him privately, each in his own time to ask their own version of questions, asking, “tell us now and the others later when will these things happen? And what will be the sign of your return, and of the end of the world? And Jesus answered and said to them, “take heed that no one deceives you, even though you will not have to worry about it because it’s not you who need this warning, but the people of the 21st century. For many will come in My name, Jesus, professing to be the Christ, and they will deceive that generation of Saints. You will hear of globally-scaled wars, caused by a rising European Union dominating the world market, and creating a computer chip to track every inhabited humanoid. But write this down now for the 21st century Saints as a warning for them because the end is not yet. For nation will rise against nation, and kingdom against kingdom. And there will be famines, pestilences, and earth quakes in the 21st century, each being determined by their frequency, power, destructive cost, and total death-counts. Then Apostles in the future will be handed over to be persecuted, and put to death by the European Union leaders, and an Anti-Christ who shall reside in a rebuilt temple of Jerusalem from the wailing wall after the buildings of the temple of our day are first destroyed, and rebuilt sometime after the flag of King David is raised. Then the future Apostles will be hated by all nations on a global scale because of me. At that time, many fake Christians primarily residing within the United States, will turn away from the faith, and will betray and hate each other, and many false prophets will appear, more in number than the false Prophets of our day, such as Benny Hen, who will appear and deceive many people. Because of the increase of wickedness in the 21st century, the love of most will grow cold. But the one who stands firm to the end of time, when the world will be destroyed will be saved. And this gospel of the kingdom will be preached in the entire global earth containing land-masses and humanoid population as a testimony to all global nations, and then the end of the church age, the world, and universe as we know it, will come. So when you see the Anti-Christ, also reckoned a false Priest of God, standing in what will be a rebuilt Holy Place of Jerusalem within the rebuilt temple from what shall become known as the wailing-wall, to accomplish the ‘abomination of desolation’, spoken of by the Prophet Daniel, let the future generation of Judean’s flee to the mountains. Let none of them on the housetop go down to take anything out of the house. Let no one still farming in a field go back to get their cloak. How dreadful it will be in those days for pregnant women and nursing mothers possessing too much luggage and sprouting too many kids, for departing Judea will be nearly impossible from excessive luggage. Because the United States, led by President Obama, in conjunction with the European Union, will make leaving Judea impossible. And pray that your trip will not take place on Sunday during high traffic jams and blocked road ways, and jam-packed airports. For then will be a distress upon the land of the entire globe, unequaled from the beginning of time of the world until now and in the future, and never to be equated to again because time will end. Billions and billions of people will die from massive earth quakes, huge tornado’s, hundreds of earth quakes, falling stars, and an exploding sun. And if those days had not been cut short to 3.5 years, no flesh of any kind would have survived. But for the sake of the Christians and Jews, those days will be cut short to 3.5 years. At that time, in the 21st century, during the years when the world is about to end, and if anyone says to you, “Look, there is the Messiah!” or “There He is!” do not believe it. For false Messiah’s and false prophets will appear starting from our day and well into the 21st century and will perform great signs and wonders to deceive, if possible, the Christian and Jewish elect. See, I have told you in advanced for you to warn the Saints of the 21st century of their pending doom; but you too had better keep watch because I could return at any time, so I’m really not telling you anything in advanced; I’m merely trying to trick you just to keep you on your toes. So if anyone tells you, “There He is, out in the wilderness!” do not go out; or “here He is in the inner room!” do not believe it. For as lightning that flashes from the East, is visible also in the West, and the North, and the South, and all throughout the entire globe, so shall the return of the Son of man be visible. Where there are dead bodies by the billions, having been slaughtered by more than 200,000,000 million infantrymen from the four winds of the earth, originating out of the European Union who forms a one world government, there the vultures will gather. Immediately after the distress of those days, resulting from cataclysmic astrological catastrophes from falling stars and exploding suns and planets, the sun will no longer shine from having exploded, and the moon will turn into blood from meteor impacts, and the powers of the heavens will be displayed by the astrological phenomenon, and then they will see the sign of the Son of Man, riding clouds of air and water through national television on a global scale; how else would they be able to see me all at once, at the twinkling of an eye?. To be honest with you, the generation that is alive nearing the end of time and the world, will not pass away until every single thing I stated happens in the 21st century; but possibly you; remember I've got to keep you on your toes, so it could happen today or thousands of years from now; you'll never know, so keep watch. Heaven and Earth will be destroyed, but my words will never be destroyed.