Right now, I'm too exhausted to explain much but I've been hurting for so long from problems with my dysfunctional family of origin. Have recently lost my elderly father & my mother is not doing well. My brothers & myself are so different in how we think and what we do. We do not agree on anything. My brother's are extremely insensitive & harsh. I think (not sure) that I'm the only Christian in my family and I have been deeply affected by this all of my life.
I also have felt all my life that my family's salvation was in my hands. I didn't do my job. I thought as a child that God gave me a message, that it was up to me to become a testimony, an example, to produce fruit ... but I failed.
Instead, I was affected ... and a great sinner.
There is tremendous pride in this family. So thick you could cut it with a knife. The Lord hates pride, and so do I.
There's so much more, but I have to leave it at this for now.
Please prayer for healing & peace of mind.
Thank you so much.