I've always been a Christian even though I wasn't raised studying, going to church etc. But I've always been saving myself for marriage and have been really committed to living Christ-like more so the past few years.
I am starting to look for a future wife much more in depth now and have realized that it's a tough world out there. We are all victims of sin and it's tough to find people out there that have not had pre-marital sex.
I know we are saved by grace through faith, in what Jesus did for us. And not by our works, but I know our works keep us close to God so we don't fall away. - I know God throws our sins from as far as East to West when we ask for forgiveness though.
But I don't want to abuse this. - I am worried I won't be able to stay a virgin before marriage, especially if I find a girl that has had sex before.
I think sex is an important part of marriage because I have seen a lot of couples grow apart and even grow to hate each other. I think intimacy is important. - I am worried that I will not be able to please my future wife if she was not a virgin, and if she wants to have sex to make sure we were compatible.
I know I would be knowingly sinning, but also know I could be forgiven. But as I said, I don't want to abuse God's forgiveness and what Christ did for us.
I just want to make sure I can please my wife and we can have the best and happiest marriage. I've just seen some many couples that are unhappy and don't want this.
But I also want to be yielding and obey God. - But I think finding a great wife that can help me grow closer to God and live a happy life for God is important.
So i'm just worried that I will find myself "needing" to have premarital sex. Not for myself, but for my wife to make sure we are compatible and can truly love one another.
- Just to be clear, this is not about temptation or wanting to have sex. I'm just worried that with today's society unless I find a "strict" Christian that is saving herself, most girls I come across (and have come across) are not virgins. And I will "need" to have sex with them to make sure we can have a great relationship and/or are sexually compatible.