~ This is hard to explain - please read before posting! ~ Also... hoping that this is posted to the right place - I'm just at a loss.
A few years ago, while still an undergraduate I had a crush / fell in love with a guy who was and still is bi-sexual. Since meeting we have been close friends and personally I feel a total peace while I'm with him. However due to pressures from my family, doubts within myself and fear of committing to anything I rejected his advances - which has caused a lot of strife. As far as I can tell the feelings we did have for each other never went away and although he has dated another girl (they have since broken up) three years later we are finding ourselves in a very similar position to before.
He's an atheist, and stubbornly so - he's said to me before that he just can't find the faith that I have. So you see, he has no reason to think that his actions at any time were wrong. I know he prefers girls to boys and I know he is a trust worthy and respectful person who would never do anything behind my back - he just wouldn't do that. So if we stayed together he wouldn't go out with or sleep with another man again. The temptation would be there no doubt but that can happen with a straight man can't it? As long as he didn't act on it he wouldn't be sinning - he has no reason at this time to consider it wrong himself though.
I have always talked to my parents openly about my feelings and about my friends. Funnily enough, I have a lot of bi and gay friends, which they hate. Recently though, I've felt drawn to him again since he has broken up with his girlfriend and is paying me a lot of attention. I told my mother that I was considering starting a relationship with him, and she immediately started pointing out that he was bi, that he was disgusting etc. but if he repented for what he had done that she would accept him. My father... well my father basically said that I wouldn't get any help from him (and I'd lose my house ) if I went out with this guy.
What I don't understand, or seemingly get an answer for is if he still considers himself Bi (i.e. he finds some men attractive) and yet is going out with a woman is he sinning? Would I be sinning for going out with him? Is there anything saying that this is wrong?
I know the teaching on homosexuality, but if for all intent and purposes he has been and would be in a hetero-sexual relationship, is there an issue?
My mother thinks there is an issue, and that he's untrustworthy etc because of his bi-sexuality... this doesn't bother me however because I know that he'd never do such a thing as cheat.
Now I'm feeling so upset and such resentment for my family's reaction - I just don't understand where the issue is if he is in a heterosexual relationship.
I have no idea how I would broach the subject with anyone and I don't know where I can find teaching on this - how do you approach this? How do you reason not wanting to repent because of atheism?
I'm completely at a loss.
Thank You for taking your time to read this.