Can anyone really start over following Christ?

[Oregongrown]

I was saved in 93, I asked Jesus into my life. Since then I have done almost everything wrong that is possible, I mean against God's Word. Oh I've spent plenty of time in church and plenty of time with other christians but I have not either been willing to give it all to God or maybe I am not capable. I am so lost, depressed, out of work(which most of my self-esteem has always come from)and staying with a non-believing sister but she is the only one that has offered to put a roof over my head, oh, except the homeless shelter.

So here I am, back at the forum I used to participate in some, looking for answers. Please no one tell me to take pills for my depression because I have tried and they don't work and I don't have any faith in them at all. I believe God can straighten me out but He doesn't seem to be with me. I know that is a feeling only but I am 58 now, 4 times divorced and on my own now 14 years. I have suffered for my poor choices and I still am. Am I alone in this or does anyone else relate? Why does everyone elses life look so together. I went to my 40 year class reunion and still haven't decided if that was a good or bad idea. Good part was how many of my classmates are also christians now

Denise

[Dani H]

I have not either been willing to give it all to God

Why not? What's holding you back? Really?

You assume a lot. For example, you assume you're in the position you're currently in because God has dropped you and moved to another universe. I hope you don't mind me being blunt.

Who is to say you're not exactly in the position you're currently in, because God has allowed it, or even planned it, to bring you to exactly this place at exactly this time, to get your attention in a way you wouldn't pay it before?

Go crawl to the Throne of Grace (if you can't do it standing up) and start over. The right way. The one way you know how. You do know, don't you?

Today is a good day for that, I believe.

[Oregongrown]

No, your bluntness doesn't bother me and your advice is good. I do hope someone shares with me about a similar experience they've had since I am already convicted. I like a mix of Truth and Grace Dani but there is a place for the kind of help you give Denise

[Diggindeeper]

Denise...start over. From square #1.

I don't know what kind of work you do, but even that...you CAN start over. Of course, with God, there's nothing hidden that shall not be made known. He knows about the 4 divorces and the poor choices.

But, if you are serious, I'd still repent of that to God.

We really CAN do whatever we determine deep in our heart to do. WITH GOD, all things are possible! Its really true.
Matthew 19:26
But Jesus beheld them, and said unto them, With men this is impossible; but with God all things are possible.

Mark 9:23
Jesus said unto him, If thou canst believe, all things are possible to him that believeth.

Mark 10:27
And Jesus looking upon them saith, With men it is impossible, but not with God: for with God all things are possible.

[Oregongrown]

thanks diggin, I will keep moving ahead even though nothing happens fast enough for me. I have a new church, tiny 4-square here where I am staying. I am reading His Word again and searching for work with faith that He will open a door.

It's like I "know" in my heart the answer to all my questions but it is so helpful to talk about them to other christians. I have 3 or 4 gals I talk to on the phone pretty regularly and 2 things at church per week so getting that fellowship as well.

God bless, Denise

[chad]

The answer is Yes, you can come back. God is love and God loves you.

[Oregongrown]

thanks chad, guess I best be takin Him His Word God bless your day!

[Al_S]

Denise,

I too will be blunt in my answer and I hope it helps and the message is not lost. The short answer to your initial question is yes, but I hope you read on.

Christ is not a whore. There is nothing that you or I can do to earn salvation. There are no works we can perform, no deeds we can do, nothing we can buy to secure our salvation on our own. The only way to salvation is through Christ. This requires placing your absolute 100% faith in Him for salvation. It's just a guess, but I'm thinking in the past you held back something in your heart rather than surrendering to Him.

The original sin was man telling God that we needed something more than what He could offer. In doing so, we sought to glorify ourselves rather that giving glory to Him who was worthy. This is the curse we live with. We all have something(s) we place between God and us, that we erect as idols, rather than seeking to glorify Him and rely on Him alone for your salvation.

It sounds like God has sought you out in the past, but you held on to something. You are at a crucial stage now where once again, you are poor in spirit. You have a choice. You can relinquish all to Jesus, placing your full faith in Him, setting your focus and sights on Him. Repent of your sin and offer Him everything. Trust that whatever he chooses to take away from you (family, pride, possessions, etc.) will only be gain for you. Or you can continue to glorify yourself and not place your faith in Him. It is in this choice you will find true salvation. To those who surrender, He offers life eternal, peace and comfort--even in our hardships. Most though would rather hold onto their pride.

Once you have placed your faith in Him, through Him and His grace, you will be saved and transformed. Through His grace and through His assistance, you will be able to turn from your old life and made new. Absent your willingness to place your full faith in Him though, you will not have peace.

[Diggindeeper]

thanks diggin, I will keep moving ahead even though nothing happens fast enough for me. I have a new church, tiny 4-square here where I am staying. I am reading His Word again and searching for work with faith that He will open a door.

It's like I "know" in my heart the answer to all my questions but it is so helpful to talk about them to other christians. I have 3 or 4 gals I talk to on the phone pretty regularly and 2 things at church per week so getting that fellowship as well.

God bless, Denise

You'll be okay, Sweetie! You're headin' the right way now. Soon nothing will turn you back again! And I just betcha if there is ever, ever a husband #5...my guess is he better be nearly an ANGEL!!! Right?

[lovex]

With Christ, it is never to late. He wants you, He loves you, He died for you, and He rose again for you. Everything that He did, was for you. I fail to truly understand those statements because after everything I've done in my life, it's hard not to think that His love would run out...but it never does... His love is unconditional. Whatever has happened in the past, let it be there, because you are forgiven. Whatever is happening right in this moment, allow yourself to not worry or trouble yourself with burdens, because He wants them. He wants to lift off the weight of them and take them as His own. Allow blessings (whether we look at them as good or bad) flow from your trust in the Lord. Maybe things are happening that you ask why...but ask the Lord to trust in Him and know that you don't need to ask why because He is in control. Submit tomorrow, and the next, and the next... to Him. Get lost in Him so He can give you life. And pray...pray until you can't pray anymore. He listens, He hears, He loves you. Never forget that.

[moonglow]

I was saved in 93, I asked Jesus into my life. Since then I have done almost everything wrong that is possible, I mean against God's Word. Oh I've spent plenty of time in church and plenty of time with other christians but I have not either been willing to give it all to God or maybe I am not capable. I am so lost, depressed, out of work(which most of my self-esteem has always come from)and staying with a non-believing sister but she is the only one that has offered to put a roof over my head, oh, except the homeless shelter.

So here I am, back at the forum I used to participate in some, looking for answers. Please no one tell me to take pills for my depression because I have tried and they don't work and I don't have any faith in them at all. I believe God can straighten me out but He doesn't seem to be with me. I know that is a feeling only but I am 58 now, 4 times divorced and on my own now 14 years. I have suffered for my poor choices and I still am. Am I alone in this or does anyone else relate? Why does everyone elses life look so together. I went to my 40 year class reunion and still haven't decided if that was a good or bad idea. Good part was how many of my classmates are also christians now

Denise

Hi Denise! I am really sorry you are struggling and seem to have hit bottom. The good news is thing can only go up and get better from there!

I am 50...a single parent divorced from an abusive marriage...many years now and raising my son alone (though I do get alot of help from my mom and step dad). I am also disabled too...bad back. Though I do have a couple of little part time jobs.

I grew up in a Christian home and we went to church on a regular basis until my dad was killed in a car accident when I was 11. Then we stopped going to church. I think it was just too painful for my mom you know? She went into a terrible depression...alot of grief there and being left alone to raise three young girls on her own. I was the oldest.

I was baptized at age 10 and while I did believe in God and did accept Jesus into my life...not having church or a spiritual leader in the home in my teenager years ...well I ended up living in the world and following its ways and its truths. Though I wasn't really following Christ...He made sure I knew He was still around by big and little events in my life. Later my mom remarried and he became a pastor so I did get back into church again at least for awhile. They they had an ugly divorce. By my adult years I thought I could run my own life...and had God over here in a corner...you know when I needed Him.. When I messed up. (which was alot!)

Now I did pray the sinners prayer hundreds of times! I would cry my eyes out wanting that real connection with Him and that peace and joy I saw in other Christians but it seemed He was at arm's length no matter what I did.

I was years later after I messed up my life once again very badly and this time taking a little baby with me...my son, that I finally completely surrended my life (all of it) to Him. I gave up. Gave up trying to run it myself...so I gave Him control for every part of my life...not just some of it or most of it but all of it.

Its not uncommon for a Christians to slip away and go off doing their own thing...there are alot of scriptures on this and God will search you out!

Matthew 18:11-13

New King James Version (NKJV)

11 For the Son of Man has come to save that which was lost.
12 “What do you think? If a man has a hundred sheep, and one of them goes astray, does he not leave the ninety-nine and go to the mountains to seek the one that is straying? 13 And if he should find it, assuredly, I say to you, he rejoices more over that sheep than over the ninety-nine that did not go astray.

My life changed completely once I turned it over to Him..it actually got harder! I read alot of Psalms! I can't image going through what I did alone...without Him. He doesn't promise things suddenly get better or easier or life becomes a rose garden but that He will hang onto you...love you and comfort you. And most importantly teach you and shape you through those difficult times. Some of the sins I was involved in stopped. The desire to do those sins just went away. God was working and moving in my life in amazing ways inspite of myself.

He is there FOR you.

Psalm 31
To the Chief Musician. A Psalm of David.
1 In You, O LORD, I put my trust;
Let me never be ashamed;
Deliver me in Your righteousness.
2 Bow down Your ear to me,
Deliver me speedily;
Be my rock of refuge,
A fortress of defense to save me.

So many are going through extremely difficult times right now...thousands upon thousands out of work. Countless more who have lost their homes this year due to fires and floods and torando's. More suffering through this terrible heat wave that might not be able to afford air conditioning. Alot of misery going on that is for sure. But the Lord is there for them...if they will turn to Him and allow Him to save them.

You hang in there! Don't give up hope because the Creator of the Universe loves you.

God bless

[Oregongrown]

I want to thank all that replied and now, Moonglow, I so appreciate your story(your sharing it). I am not sure I truly know "how" to surrender it all. I thought I did so at times but it comes to mind people saying it is an ongoing thing. Like surrender each day. I am doing that today. Been on my knees and even if I don't know what to say I just ask Him for His help and guidance. Thank you again, to all who replied, Denise, a sister in Christ

[Silvermist]

I hear you Oregongrown, I'm going through a dry spell of my own, but I've learned from past experience that when I feel that God is far from me He is really right under my nose. Hang in there. I'll pray for both of us.

[Oregongrown]

thanks silvermist, I will pray to, how about here so I don't "conveniently" forget

Father in heaven, I just ask that you bless everyone here Lord especially those that are struggling like me or going through hard times and not struggling. Those are the ones I want to be like oh Lord. To "stand still and behold the salvation of the Lord". I thank You today Father, for giving each of us willingness to share and fellowship with other believers, I pray you make appointments for all of us today to witness of your endless love and that there is a resting place for all the trials of this world, in your capable arms. I pray all these things and thank You in advance Father, in the precious name of Jesus, amen

[Dani H]

Oh honey, we all struggle. Most of us just don't talk about it but do it quietly, silently choking on our own secrets, afraid we're the only ones dealing with what we deal with. Well, that's just complete bollocks!

There's only a limited amount of devils, they're not making any more in a super-secret factory somewhere, and they only have so many tricks up their sleeve.

But, there is an unlimited GOD who can deliver us from anything and everything and who is with us in our struggles and brings others alongside for backup and to carry our burdens with. You are not alone in this! You are not the only one dealing with this! And good for you for finally opening up about it! Being open with God and one another ... brings freedom and deliverance.

Surrender is not a once-and-for-all thing. It's a setting yourself on that path, being willing to do it, and then walking it out daily in reality and actuality as the Spirit of God lets you in on the details as you go. It's a decision-by-decision process, and don't let anyone ever tell you any different. It's all about living in reality where that rubber hits that road, making godly decision in our circumstances as they present themselves and giving those nitty gritty details to the Lord as they present themselves, letting Him in on our daily doings as we give Him the right to make the final decisions in matters that concern us and submitting to His final authority, thereby letting God be God.

So as God delivers you ... strengthen your brothers and sisters. Let God break and rebuild you, give every day to Him, give every hour to Him, every person, every circumstance ... just tune your antenna heaven-ward. keep it that way, and rely on His grace and new mercy, every day, from now until the Lord returns or you go home, whichever is first. Forgetting the things that are behind, and pressing onward. Grab that Hand and don't let it go. Struggle ... no struggle ... wet spell ... dry spell ... valley ... mountain ... whatever. It don't matter. Seasons are subject to change. Circumstances are subject to change. Only you and Jesus, that's what matters. If a thief on a cross can repent in the last moments of his life ... there's grace available to you too. So take it, and run with it.

K?