Note: For some proper context and background, I would suggest first reading the threads entitled "Stressful situation between my biological mother and myself" and "Please pray for my grandma" in the Prayer forum.
I think I am at a bit of a crossroads when it comes to my relationship with my biological mother. While I love her very much, want God's best for her and want to honor her the way I am commanded in Scripture, I think my continued relationship with her might be hindering me from receiving all God has for me and my wife at this point in time. After all, if I am placing a higher priority on my relationship with her than I am on my relationship with God, that is a form of idolatry, and God is neither pleased nor honored by that. I want everything God has for me, and want to live a life that is wholly committed to Him and His ways, no matter what the consequences to myself or anyone else might be. The reason I think I might be at a crossroads with my mother is because I honestly don't know how to relate to her any more. There are things about my past that I've tried asking her about via email that she refuses to answer, and while I understand that was a painful part of her life, I don't understand why she continues to refuse to answer my questions. It's like she is trying to shut me out, and that really hurts. Maybe she doesn't even realize that is what it seems like to me. The thing is, the way I see it, if she has nothing to hide and a clear conscience, why can't she just simply answer my questions? Maybe she wants to put the whole thing behind her, and me asking all these questions is just opening old wounds. I just don't know. I wish I knew what to do. I don't want to cut her completely out of my life for good, since I am her only child and any children my wife and I have will be her only grandchildren. I also don't want to have her unhealthiness and dysfunctionality dragging me down and away from God's best for my life. So, any prayers, advice, counsel or wisdom anybody has regarding this situation would be greatly appreciated. God bless, and have a great day in the Lord!
Yours in Christ,