Re: The pain of sanctification
It's not incomplete. Because we're also commanded to love our neighbors as we love ourselves.
It's not a buffet. Scripture is a complete whole, but we often pick and choose, to our own undoing.
In your example, love dictates that you would get our butt over to Ruth's house and ask forgiveness and make things right.
Then you get your butt over before God's throne and say "Evidently I been gossiping because there's something in me that made me say unkind things about Ruth behind her back. I am giving that something over to You and am asking You to yank it out by the root and replace it with Your resurrection life so that history doesn't repeat itself and I am able to grow past this garbage."
Why did you run off at the mouth about Ruth to begin with?
Maybe gossip isn't the issue, but envy or jealousy? Hatred or unforgiveness? Insecurity or self-validation?
The gossip is the fruit, not the cause, see? Because out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks. What's in your heart toward Ruth when you say these things? That's the bottom of the issue. Not the words coming out.
Because for every Ruth there's a Sally and a Jane and a Mary, and on and on it goes, see? Patterns. That's where the tree is that you see the fruit of, and every tree has a root somewhere. Why keep hacking at branches when you can let God yank out the root and be done with it and grow a different tree with different fruit?
We always stop short by just asking forgiveness, getting up off our knees, and then falling into the exact same ditch 2 minutes (or days or weeks or months) later.
Go all the way and understand you're dealing with the Resurrection and the Life, and let God actually be God in your life instead of thinking He's interested in behavior modification. We can modify our own behavior. That doesn't take God's power. What takes God's power, is transformation, which results in the fruit of the Spirit being evident in us, as can be seen over time. It's real and true.
And I've never encountered your example in my own life, actually, because when God comes in and yanks the root out ... Dani is done with whatever it is that this fruit came from and now grows a different fruit instead.
Even so, come Lord Jesus!