A week ago today, my boyfriend of three years broke it off with me. It was devastating, because I thought we were doing really well together, despite one small breakup a month before. The reason he gave me for breaking up was because I "need to grow up some." (Real meaning: Stop letting your mother do things for you, you're an adult now.)
So, for the first four days, I was physically sick the whole time. The only thing that got me through was the thought of possibly getting back together with him, so I worked as hard as I could to grow up as quick as I could. That only resulted in me getting even MORE sick.
The next month or so is going to be a little strange, because we live in the same house. I will put my faith in God, and He will help me through all of this.
Last night, after a particularly hurtful conversation with him, I took a long hot shower, and had a heart-to-heart with our Creator. I realized a lot of things during that talk with God, and I thought I'd share some of what I learned here.
God never leaves your side. Even when you turn away from Him, He's always there. The relationship I was in was with another Christian, but we both fell away from God during the past year or so. I'm really looking forward to re-building my relationship with God, and a good, Christian friendship with my ex.
God will only give you what He thinks you can handle. I needed to be forced out of my comfort zone a little, and God knew I could handle this breakup. Maybe someday the ex and I will make up, get back together, and resume our wedding plans, but if not, I'm going to trust God. He knows His plans for me. Maybe I was meant to be in a relationship with someone else before I met this one. Or maybe, I'm meant to learn more about myself before I find the one.
Trust God. He'll get you through anything. He's gotten me through: life with a father, who never really wanted our family; the death of my wonderful, Christian uncle, who taught me so much (lost to cancer); physical and mental abuse from a foster-child that my family took in; my parents splitting up, sending my father into an unhealthy relationship; and my (ex-)boyfriend's mother getting cancer, fighting it, and relapsing. (She's going through chemo again. Pray for her, please!!) He's gotten me through so many things, that I know, with absolute certainty, that He's going to get me through this breakup.
For other people going through tough breakups, or heartbreaks of any kind, I found some verses today that really helped me. (All are the CEB version.)
Psalm 34:17-18 - When the righteous cry out, the Lord listens; He delivers them from all their troubles. The Lord is close to the broken-hearted; He saves those whose spirits are crushed.
Psalm 43:5 - Why, I ask myself, are you so depressed? Why are you so upset inside? Hope in God! Because I will again give him thanks, my saving presence and my God.
Psalm 73:26 - My body and my heart fail, but God is my heart's rock and my share forever.
Psalm 147:3 - God heals the broken-hearted and bandages their wounds.
Nahum 1:7 - The Lord is good, a haven in a day of distress. He acknowledges those who take refuge in him.
Philippians 4:13 - I can endure all these things through the power of the one who gives me strength.