I feel like such a failure as I christian..once again

[parsonsmom]

Denise; I have been there, and it is not easy; You have afree will. you may choose what you want to. I suggest the best thing is to take your bible and read by subject, read out loud to your self.

Start on 1John.


1 That which was from the beginning, which we have heard, which we have seen with our eyes, which we have looked upon, and our hands have handled, of the Word of life;
² For the life was manifested, and we have seen it, and bear witness, and shew unto you that eternal life, which was with the Father, and was manifested unto us;
³ That which we have seen and heard declare we unto you, that ye also may have fellowship with us: and truly our fellowship is with the Father, and with his Son Jesus Christ.
⁴ And these things write we unto you, that your joy may be full.
⁵ This then is the message which we have heard of him, and declare unto you, that God is light, and in him is no darkness at all.
⁶ If we say that we have fellowship with him, and walk in darkness, we lie, and do not the truth:
⁷ But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship one with another, and the blood of Jesus Christ his Son cleanseth us from all sin.
⁸ If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us.
⁹ If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.
¹⁰ If we say that we have not sinned, we make him a liar, and his word is not in us. Respectfully Parsonsmom.

[parsonsmom]

This is it! I know this is it. It is about the "gifts" and it is about what all I know in the bible. The last few times I read it I said to myself "I already know that, why read it again". I am going to meditate on this and pray to God that He gets my focus back to where it was. Thank you for writing to me, I doubt I would have ever looked at this but it is me. I have so much, I've been blessed with so much and I am so unhappy I don't want any of it. I want to throw away schooling because I see it is not bringing me any joy or happiness. I was happier poor, broke and with no direction. I had hope though, hope in Christ and I wasn't afraid.

Denise

Shalom Denise; I have been there ;done that; If we can listen to the prompting Spirit that resides whih in a Bornagain believer;

2 Corinthians; 10:4 & 5; read out loud ;if you don't understand the first time read until you have some revelation.

3 For though we walk in the flesh, we do not war after the flesh:

4 For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal, but mighty through God to the pulling down of strong holds;

5 Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ;

6 And having in a readiness to revenge all disobedience, when your obedience is fulfilled.

Psalm 1
(KJV)

1 Blessed is the man that walketh not in the counsel of the ungodly, nor standeth in the way of sinners, nor sitteth in the seat of the scornful.

2 But his delight is in the law of the Lord; and in his law doth he meditate day and night.

3 And he shall be like a tree planted by the rivers of water, that bringeth forth his fruit in his season; his leaf also shall not wither; and whatsoever he doeth shall prosper.

19 Having therefore, brethren, boldness to enter into the holiest by the blood of Jesus,
20 By a new and living way, which he hath consecrated for us, through the veil, that is to say, his flesh;
21 And having an high priest over the house of God;
22 Let us draw near with a true heart in full assurance of faith, having our hearts sprinkled from an evil conscience, and our bodies washed with pure water.
23 Let us hold fast the profession of our faith without wavering; for he is faithful that promised; Respectfully; Parsonsmom

[mrsarnold]

Denise, I have been a 'yo-yo' with regard to my walk with God. I don't know that I ever doubted His existance. I certainly have questioned His ways in my life. I am just now trying to get my feet back under me spritually.

You said in your original post that life isn't that bad for you and you seemed to find it odd that you are being tempted away or becoming lax at this time. In my life the times I was closest to the Lord were those times I was MOST in need. When I was in an abusive relationship (former husband) with two little toddler girls and since he was in the military we lived thousands of miles from anyone who really loved me (my family) I leaned so heavily on the Lord and He really did draw so near. I'm not saying you should pray or hope for adversity, but I am saying that when we think we have things under control we may not stay in step with our reading and praying as much as we really should. We can tend to forget God when we don't feel a very present need for Him.

Don't despair. The fact that you have recognised this situation means that the Holy Spirit in you is putting up the red flag and saying 'Danger' is lurking. The Word of God tells us to pray about everything. Talk to the Lord about what you are feeling. He does understand and He will help you.