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Thread: A couple with different beliefs...

  1. #1
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    A couple with different beliefs...

    Is it possible for a couple to live together in harmony even though they don't see eye to eye on everything? A couple has the same basic beliefs but it's the details that are different. For example: he believes it is a sin to drink and she believes that it's not a sin to drink in moderation, but it is a sin to get drunk. They both have scripture to back their arguments...

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    Re: A couple with different beliefs...

    Quote Originally Posted by Ashley1976 View Post
    Is it possible for a couple to live together in harmony even though they don't see eye to eye on everything? A couple has the same basic beliefs but it's the details that are different. For example: he believes it is a sin to drink and she believes that it's not a sin to drink in moderation, but it is a sin to get drunk. They both have scripture to back their arguments...
    Well, all the couples I've ever met see 100% eye to eye on everything and never disagree or fight. I myself walk always hand in hand with my wife in perfect biblical husband ship, singing praises unto the Lord. In addition, I have some oceanfront property in North Dakota I think you would like.....

    You could ask the pastor. Ultimately, you may need to compromise

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    Re: A couple with different beliefs...

    I agree with NHL. I have some property with a beautiful view of the mountains in Illinois that I'm selling.

    Unfortunately, even though her view aligns more with Scripture, she'll need to go along with her husband, the weaker brother, most likely in this situation based on Romans 14 until she, or more likely someone else, can convince him otherwise.

    I don't think he has Scripture in context that supports his view.
    In essentials, unity; in non-essentials, liberty; in all things, charity. - unknown

    Read your Bible and pray every single day. - Pastor Jon Courson

  4. #4
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    Re: A couple with different beliefs...

    Lol no ones Theology is perfect.
    As long as there Ideas of the Gospel are right then there is no true problem.
    I'm a walking paradox, No I'm not.


    "Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former."- Albert Einstein

    "rest assured, that with a heart that's pure, we'll be victorious and not let our hate get the best of us" - Stick to Your Guns


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    Re: A couple with different beliefs...

    Quote Originally Posted by withoutfcf123 View Post
    Lol no ones Theology is perfect.
    As long as there Ideas of the Gospel are right then there is no true problem.
    Slight differences do not matter, it is how they handle these differences, and treat each other that counts.
    God happens!
    'I Can Only Imagine'

    Bless the Beasts and the Children:
    http://youtu.be/AhR36gV6vW4

    On cautionary note:
    Quote Originally Posted by ProjectPeter
    When they say something... it is about anyone's guess what it is they really mean... but NEVER ask for clarification of their mysterious language... they are often very happy to give it and that's when the discussion goes FREAKY!

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    Re: A couple with different beliefs...

    Quote Originally Posted by slightlypuzzled View Post
    Slight differences do not matter, it is how they handle these differences, and treat each other that counts.
    Amen to that. It's not a critical issue of salvation. Not too hard to just be a tea-totaller for the sake of the other's beliefs on it.

    My grandparents always promoted a strict code of no drinking which they based on Christianity. I don't agree that it's based on scripture, but it was also quite easy to simply go with it when around them.

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    Re: A couple with different beliefs...

    Quote Originally Posted by NHL Fever View Post
    Amen to that. It's not a critical issue of salvation. Not too hard to just be a tea-totaller for the sake of the other's beliefs on it.

    My grandparents always promoted a strict code of no drinking which they based on Christianity. I don't agree that it's based on scripture, but it was also quite easy to simply go with it when around them.
    I can't rep you because I just did somewhere else, but again, a very nice answer.
    In essentials, unity; in non-essentials, liberty; in all things, charity. - unknown

    Read your Bible and pray every single day. - Pastor Jon Courson

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    Re: A couple with different beliefs...

    One thing I feel that my wife and myself are kinda struggling with only in other area's, for the most part we're on the same page except when it comes to listening to God and ministry.

    Something I remember from Bible College that really stuck, and good thing since I do love my occasional drink is that moderation, moderation, moderation and type, and by type I mean strength; wine back then was much weaker tho probably drunk more often! Usually due to cleanliness of water and sanitation, they were not stupid back then and knew water into wine equals shelf life. Just don't become and raging alcoholic, I'll admit I drink. Though not often and usually my choice is a dark beer, home made wine or from a local winery or something along the line of mixed drinks like white russians, rum and cola, etc, etc. A bottle typically last me one / two weeks or more and sometimes I wont drink for months or years.

    I've never felt convicted by this.

    My wife and myself are on the same page with this.

    Should always make sure that you both are going in the same direction at the same speed and remember to support each other when one is falling behind with prayer, love and patience.

    Most common thing me and my wife has in common is God and the way we believe we should raise our children, some other things vary slightly but we still listen to each others studies and find common ground if we can, but the Bible is not worth arguing about. Just pray for each other if you cant agree, God will take care of the rest.

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    Re: A couple with different beliefs...

    A marriage is all about how two people treat each other, regardless of what they agree/disagree on. No more and no less.

    Nowhere do we find the command of "thou shalt agree about everything." Only to love/respect one another. Unity has less to do with agreeing over every little thing than it has to know how to strike compromises and learning to agree to disagree but still care for one another and remain devoted and faithful to God and one another. God gives us some basic rules and apart from those there's a lot of wiggle room. It's all about what you do with that wiggle room and whether or not you let other people have freedom instead of trying to cram them into your own personal box. If two people are the same then one of them becomes unnecessary. God makes us all different for a reason.
    Even so, come Lord Jesus!

  10. #10
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    Re: A couple with different beliefs...

    I see your problem - from both points of view.
    My mother had a grandfather who wasted money on alcohloic drink, therefore she was brought up to have nothing to do with the 'demon drink'.
    My husband could happily drink half a bottle of whisky in an evening 'to be sociable' without being affected in any way ( he never drank much normally). He never touched alccohol, or had any in sight, when my mother was around.
    However, in the case you mention, the Bible teaches that the wife is to submit to her husband (including his tee-total beliefs), who loves her 'as Christ loved the Church' - in other words is willing to die for her; could that mean dying to previously held strong points of view?
    Perhaps the couple concerned need to discuss exactly why each of them holds their point of view, and also be prepared to meet each other half way.

    ps. I don't drink alcohol myself, mainly because I like Brandy, but consider it a waste of the money that could be donated for the welfare of those in the world who lack the necessities of life I enjoy. . .

  11. #11
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    Re: A couple with different beliefs...

    Quote Originally Posted by Ashley1976 View Post
    Is it possible for a couple to live together in harmony even though they don't see eye to eye on everything? A couple has the same basic beliefs but it's the details that are different. For example: he believes it is a sin to drink and she believes that it's not a sin to drink in moderation, but it is a sin to get drunk. They both have scripture to back their arguments...
    yes, very possible. My husband and I often have different views and yet we have learned to respect that in each other. We have been married over 50 years.
    "The flowers appear on the earth,
    the time of singing has come,
    and the voice of the turtledove
    is heard in our land
    ." SofS 2:12 (RSV)

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