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Thread: Being Lustful, is it always a Sin?

  1. #1

    Being Lustful, is it always a Sin?

    Hi everyone,

    I am just coming to God, or should I say returning I am not sure I believed a long time ago but got lost and am finding God again now.

    I hope it is ok to discuss this kind of subject, if not let me know and I will delete but it's a genuine question I have. So I was pondering the subject of Lust last night. I am happily married and only have eyes for her and you could also say I lust after her she is the most beautiful woman in both body, mind, and soul.

    Now I know it says in the bible it is a sin to lust or covet your neighbor's wife etc but what if you are married and it is your own wife/husband etc which you may lust after?

    So fast forward to this morning and I was praying about the subject and I opened the bible ton two separate occasions to the following scriptures;

    1 John 2:16-17 King James Version (KJV)

    16 For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh, and the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life, is not of the Father, but is of the world.
    17 And the world passeth away, and the lust thereof: but he that doeth the will of God abideth for ever.


    Galatians 5:16-18 King James Version (KJV)

    "16 This I say then, Walk in the Spirit, and ye shall not fulfil the lust of the flesh.
    17 For the flesh lusteth against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh: and these are contrary the one to the other: so that ye cannot do the things that ye would.
    18 But if ye be led of the Spirit, ye are not under the law.

    So this shocked me a little as it seemed to directly answer that question or at least be relating to it but I am still confused. Do you think this is, basically, confirming that lusting/desiring no matter the person, including your marital partner, is a sin?


  2. #2
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    Re: Being Lustful, is it always a Sin?

    Quote Originally Posted by Belief View Post
    Hi everyone,

    I am just coming to God, or should I say returning I am not sure I believed a long time ago but got lost and am finding God again now.

    I hope it is ok to discuss this kind of subject, if not let me know and I will delete but it's a genuine question I have. So I was pondering the subject of Lust last night. I am happily married and only have eyes for her and you could also say I lust after her she is the most beautiful woman in both body, mind, and soul.

    Now I know it says in the bible it is a sin to lust or covet your neighbor's wife etc but what if you are married and it is your own wife/husband etc which you may lust after?

    So fast forward to this morning and I was praying about the subject and I opened the bible ton two separate occasions to the following scriptures;

    1 John 2:16-17 King James Version (KJV)

    [FONT="]16 For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh, and the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life, is not of the Father, but is of the world.
    17 And the world passeth away, and the lust thereof: but he that doeth the will of God abideth for ever.

    [/FONT]

    Galatians 5:16-18 King James Version (KJV)

    "16 This I say then, Walk in the Spirit, and ye shall not fulfil the lust of the flesh.
    17 For the flesh lusteth against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh: and these are contrary the one to the other: so that ye cannot do the things that ye would.
    18 But if ye be led of the Spirit, ye are not under the law.

    So this shocked me a little as it seemed to directly answer that question or at least be relating to it but I am still confused. Do you think this is, basically, confirming that lusting/desiring no matter the person, including your marital partner, is a sin?

    Depends on what you are lusting after?

    James 1:14 But every man is tempted, when he is drawn away of his own lust, and enticed.

    15 Then when lust hath conceived, it bringeth forth sin: and sin, when it is finished, bringeth forth death.

  3. #3

    Re: Being Lustful, is it always a Sin?

    It's not lust when it's your wife. At least not a sinful lust. It's a natural thing, and a wonderful thing, to desire one's spouse.
    9 Let us not lose heart in doing good, for in due time we will reap if we do not grow weary. 10 So then, while we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, and especially to those who are of the household of the faith. - Galatians 6:9-10 NASB

  4. #4
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    Re: Being Lustful, is it always a Sin?

    It can be a sin to lust after you own wife. Well, I am trying to be too gentle. It is a sin to lust for your wife. There's a big difference between natural desire and lust. Plus, one can use his wife as an object of lust just as one can any other woman or movie or photo.

    Lust = my pleasure at your expense. Love = your pleasure at my expense. To desire and to lust are not the same. And for a man that desires his wife, he should also be desiring to please her. Lust is desire on steroids and self centered.
    Matt 9:13
    13 "But go and learn what this means: ' I DESIRE COMPASSION,AND NOT SACRIFICE,' for I did not come to call the righteous, but sinners."
    NASU

  5. #5

    Re: Being Lustful, is it always a Sin?

    Quote Originally Posted by Brother Mark View Post
    It can be a sin to lust after you own wife. Well, I am trying to be too gentle. It is a sin to lust for your wife. There's a big difference between natural desire and lust. Plus, one can use his wife as an object of lust just as one can any other woman or movie or photo.

    Lust = my pleasure at your expense. Love = your pleasure at my expense. To desire and to lust are not the same. And for a man that desires his wife, he should also be desiring to please her. Lust is desire on steroids and self centered.
    Thankks guys. So its all good within your marriage if its not born from selfishness.

    Thats good and makes sense.

  6. #6

    Re: Being Lustful, is it always a Sin?

    Hi

    I’m glad you are re-fellowshipping and asking questions.

    The difference between Gods perspective and teachings, and the worlds perspective and standards.

    Is God does not use words such as lust or the desiring of one’s partner or another, because it is a carnal expression and manifestation of the flesh and not of God.

    The world teaches that such words as lust and desire are ok, but in the kingdom of God he uses words such as honour, respect, unconditional love, mercy, compassion forgiveness, etc as words and demonstration to our partners and people.

    So you have to be aware of the enemy’s strategies and tactics, to compromise Gods principles and teachings, on how we should live and behave, they are not the same views and standards as the worlds.

    The more you read the word of God and transform the more you will become Christ like, and use less of the words from your past and in the world.

    It just takes time.

    Peace.
    Last edited by Sam07; Feb 28th 2018 at 08:43 AM. Reason: gramma

  7. #7

    Re: Being Lustful, is it always a Sin?

    Quote Originally Posted by Sam07 View Post
    Is God does not use words such as lust or the desiring of one’s partner or another, because it is a carnal expression and manifestation of the flesh and not of God.
    Psalm 45:10-12 New American Standard Bible (NASB)
    10
    Listen, O daughter, give attention and incline your ear:
    Forget your people and your father’s house;
    11
    Then the King will desire your beauty.
    Because He is your Lord, bow down to Him.
    12
    The daughter of Tyre will come with a gift;
    The rich among the people will seek your favor.

    Song of Solomon 7:9-11 New American Standard Bible (NASB)
    9
    And your mouth like the best wine!”
    It goes down smoothly for my beloved,
    Flowing gently through the lips of those who fall asleep.
    10
    “I am my beloved’s,
    And his desire is for me.
    11
    “Come, my beloved, let us go out into the country,
    Let us spend the night in the villages.
    9 Let us not lose heart in doing good, for in due time we will reap if we do not grow weary. 10 So then, while we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, and especially to those who are of the household of the faith. - Galatians 6:9-10 NASB

  8. #8

    Re: Being Lustful, is it always a Sin?

    Quote Originally Posted by jesusinmylife View Post
    Psalm 45:10-12 New American Standard Bible (NASB)
    10
    Listen, O daughter, give attention and incline your ear:
    Forget your people and your father’s house;
    11
    Then the King will desire your beauty.
    Because He is your Lord, bow down to Him.
    12
    The daughter of Tyre will come with a gift;
    The rich among the people will seek your favor.

    Song of Solomon 7:9-11 New American Standard Bible (NASB)
    9
    And your mouth like the best wine!”
    It goes down smoothly for my beloved,
    Flowing gently through the lips of those who fall asleep.
    10
    “I am my beloved’s,
    And his desire is for me.
    11
    “Come, my beloved, let us go out into the country,
    Let us spend the night in the villages.
    hello

    i meant in the context of the desires of the flesh-meaning, or the lusts of the flesh

    God doesn't use the context of lust or desire as the world does, in comparison to his character, teachings or fruitfulness.

    Peace

  9. #9

    Re: Being Lustful, is it always a Sin?

    Thank you for your insight.

    This is one that I struggle but I do only have eyes for my wife, second to my children she is my world.

    I just can't imagine not having a desire/lust for her etc

    I am still just starting on this journey and hopefully, things like you say, get clearer and easier as you grow in Christ.

    Its just you can't get away from the feeling/thought of how can I be saved when it feels like you always live in sin even though you try not to because what the world says is acceptable is not always the case in the eyes of God etc.

  10. #10
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    Re: Being Lustful, is it always a Sin?

    Quote Originally Posted by Brother Mark View Post
    It can be a sin to lust after you own wife. Well, I am trying to be too gentle. It is a sin to lust for your wife. There's a big difference between natural desire and lust. Plus, one can use his wife as an object of lust just as one can any other woman or movie or photo.

    Lust = my pleasure at your expense. Love = your pleasure at my expense. To desire and to lust are not the same. And for a man that desires his wife, he should also be desiring to please her. Lust is desire on steroids and self centered.
    Amen - well said
    Those who seek God with all their heart will find Him and be given sight. Those who seek their own agenda will remain blind.

  11. #11

    Re: Being Lustful, is it always a Sin?

    Quote Originally Posted by Belief View Post
    Thank you for your insight.

    This is one that I struggle but I do only have eyes for my wife, second to my children she is my world.

    I just can't imagine not having a desire/lust for her etc

    I am still just starting on this journey and hopefully, things like you say, get clearer and easier as you grow in Christ.

    Its just you can't get away from the feeling/thought of how can I be saved when it feels like you always live in sin even though you try not to because what the world says is acceptable is not always the case in the eyes of God etc.
    hi

    i understand i have also been out of fellowship at different times.

    its just a process and it does get easier the more you fellowship, renew your mind, and interact with Jesus etc.

    it just takes time, the Holy Spirit guides reminds and prompts us to reconsider our thoughts.

    what we say, and how we react and behave with people etc.

    it doesn't mater how many times you fall over.

    only that you get back up and try again.

    good to hear you and the family are doing well.

    dont stress to much about the trails and tribulations we face on a daily basis.

    its all part of Christianity, the trail error and learning to overcome etc.

    it isn't easy, but thats the price we pay to learn about submission and sacrifice.

    Peace

  12. #12
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    Re: Being Lustful, is it always a Sin?

    Quote Originally Posted by jesusinmylife View Post
    It's not lust when it's your wife. At least not a sinful lust. It's a natural thing, and a wonderful thing, to desire one's spouse.
    I know this is semantic but when people are not married and sexual desire is present, it's lust. Now, when a married couple desire each other it is called "passion."

    It is a matter of the heart and lust is always a sin as it's more about idolizing. Lust is about taking (sex as in this topic) from what is idolized. While it is the opposite with a married couple where "passion" is more about giving (sexual pleasure) to the spouse.
    Slug1--out

    ~Titus 2:11 For the grace of God that brings salvation has appeared to all men,~

    ~Honestly, the pain of persecution lets you KNOW you are still alive... IN Christ!~

    ~Colossians 1:28 Him we preach, warning every man and teaching every man in all wisdom, that we may present every man perfect in Christ Jesus.~


    ~"In the turmoil of any chaos, all it takes is that whisper that is heard like thunder over all the noise and the chaos seems to go away, focus returns and we are comforted in knowing that God has listened to our cry for help."~


  13. #13
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    Re: Being Lustful, is it always a Sin?

    Quote Originally Posted by Brother Mark View Post
    It can be a sin to lust after you own wife. Well, I am trying to be too gentle. It is a sin to lust for your wife. There's a big difference between natural desire and lust. Plus, one can use his wife as an object of lust just as one can any other woman or movie or photo.

    Lust = my pleasure at your expense. Love = your pleasure at my expense. To desire and to lust are not the same. And for a man that desires his wife, he should also be desiring to please her. Lust is desire on steroids and self centered.
    I should have read your very next post after Jesusinmylife and just say... what Mark said!!
    Slug1--out

    ~Titus 2:11 For the grace of God that brings salvation has appeared to all men,~

    ~Honestly, the pain of persecution lets you KNOW you are still alive... IN Christ!~

    ~Colossians 1:28 Him we preach, warning every man and teaching every man in all wisdom, that we may present every man perfect in Christ Jesus.~


    ~"In the turmoil of any chaos, all it takes is that whisper that is heard like thunder over all the noise and the chaos seems to go away, focus returns and we are comforted in knowing that God has listened to our cry for help."~


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    Re: Being Lustful, is it always a Sin?

    Quote Originally Posted by Slug1 View Post
    I know this is semantic but when people are not married and sexual desire is present, it's lust. Now, when a married couple desires each other it is called "passion."

    It is a matter of the heart and lust is always a sin as it's more about idolizing. Lust is about taking (sex as in this topic) from what is idolized. While it is the opposite with a married couple where "passion" is more about giving (sexual pleasure) to the spouse.
    Question for you Slug...

    How is a young man/woman to read and understand this.

    They are 20ish, hormones raging, seeing attractive girls/boys here and there... feeling an incredible, overwhelming attraction to the opposite sex, ( this includes thoughts of "making love" to this person) ...is this "lust"? ....or is this a normal God given reaction to finding a mate, culminating in "the two shall become one"...
    A cannot be A & not A at the same time



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    Re: Being Lustful, is it always a Sin?

    Quote Originally Posted by Brother Mark View Post
    It can be a sin to lust after you own wife. Well, I am trying to be too gentle. It is a sin to lust for your wife. There's a big difference between natural desire and lust. Plus, one can use his wife as an object of lust just as one can any other woman or movie or photo.

    Lust = my pleasure at your expense. Love = your pleasure at my expense. To desire and to lust are not the same. And for a man that desires his wife, he should also be desiring to please her. Lust is desire on steroids and self centered.
    I think broMark is spot on here to, thanks for this bro!
    A cannot be A & not A at the same time



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