My commentary:
Recently I changed my signature on this board to the verse referred to here from 2 Corinthians 12. I feel very connected with Paul when he talks about his "thorn in the flesh". This in the Bible Knowledge Commentary about that verse:
So that Paul would not forget this, God gave him a constant reminder of his weakness. Countless explanations concerning the nature of his thorn in the flesh have been offered. They range from incessant temptation, dogged opponents, chronic maladies (such as ophthalmia, malaria, migraine headaches, and epilepsy), to a disability in speech. No one can say for sure what his was, but it probably was a physical affliction (for the work of Satan in this). It is understandable that Paul would consider this thorn
a hindrance to wider or more effective ministry and that he would repeatedly petition God for its removal (2 Cor. 12:8). But he learned from this experience the lesson that pervades this letter: divine power (My power, v. 8; Christ’s power, v. 9) is best displayed against the backdrop of human weaknesses (cf. 4:7) so that God alone is praised. Rather than removing the problem God gave him grace in it. This grace is sufficient (arkei, i.e., adequate in the sense of providing contentment).
The thing is, that my disability and bedriddenness also keeps me from ministering to people the way I would want to. But on the other hand, my physical problems make me a more powerful witness than I would be if I would be healthy. Also now I become weaker and more ill I am starting to experience the grace of God more than ever. Instead of healing me physically I can feel God's Presence more clearly and it makes me more quiet and very peaceful. It is almost funny.... when the whole family is worried like crazy about my health I have an attitude like I don't really care what is happening because I know God is there. And I am safe in His Arms. That's where my peace comes from and that way I can deal with this disease.
Lots of love,
Mieke

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