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MidnightsPaleGlow
Mar 11th 2008, 08:41 PM
Hey all, I'm new to this board and am a relatively new Christian (accepted Christ back in November) who (unfortunately) also suffers from Obsessive Compulsive Disorder which took on a troubling form, Scrupulosity :eek:. Lately I have been troubled about the unpardonable sin in Matthew 12 and Mark 3, after learning about such a thing, my mind began to be assaulted by thoughts that were dangerously similar to what the Pharisees had said about Jesus, and they didn't seem to want to go away either, no matter how hard I tried, they just came back, and I had a few slip of the tongue moments where I thought I said something dangerously similar. The last month and a half has been a very stressful and at times terrifying experience that landed me in an emergency psych ward. I've been taking medication now for a little over 2 weeks and it's helping somewhat, but the unwanted blasphemous thoughts/images relating to the unpardonable sin still remain, and just today, under my breath, I uttered something that when I realized it was similar to what the Pharisees had said, it immediately terrified me, it was accidental and not intentional, and I promptly asked God for forgiveness of any wrongdoing I may have committed but felt so depressed afterward, I still feel empty and the unwanted thoughts still come to mind, has God given me over to a reprobate mind/heart, I know deep down in my heart that Jesus was ministering under the power of the Holy Spirit, yet I can't seem to get my OCD mind off of the unpardonable sin. I worry that because my mind latched onto this unfairly that I might be damned. Am I doomed? They say that if you think you might have committed it and then repent, it means you haven't done it, but how would I know? Over the last month and a half I've been dreading what the eternal future holds, I feel as if I've betrayed Jesus and will be thrown to the dogs of hell when I die :cry:. I hate having Scrupulosity/OCD :mad::B:help:.

PS, please don't condemn me, I've been through alot and hope/pray that God won't hold it against me that my mind is troubled, my heart is in the right place, but my mind is tortured. I just don't know anymore. I feel so depressed and alone and that is never a good feeling.

pursuetruth
Mar 11th 2008, 09:11 PM
PS, please don't condemn me, I've been through alot and hope/pray that God won't hold it against me that my mind is troubled, my heart is in the right place, but my mind is tortured. I just don't know anymore. I feel so depressed and alone and that is never a good feeling.[/quote]



I'm sure I speak for EVERYONE when I say that you'll receive NO condemnation here !!!!!!!
What you need most is to know that the Lord doesn't want you to be condemning yourself. It is obviously sending you down a path that is not healthy for your spirit. I suggest that you pray that the Lord open your eyes to how valuable you are, to Him. That you feel in your soul how well-loved you are, and that you know beyond a shadow of a doubt that NONE of us are perfect people. We're all broken, just as you are, and are works in progress.
Please continue with your medication, and I will be praying that you see wonderful results from it. Look at all we have, and all we are, through the Lord !!


I am born again…through the living and enduring word of God. (1 Peter 1:23)

I am a child of God. (John 1:12)

I am saved by grace through faith. (Ephesians 2:8-9)

I am loved by God and He gave his one and only Son for me. (John 3:16)

I am a new creation in Christ; the old has gone and the new has come! (2 Corinthians 5:17)

I have peace with God. (Romans 5:1)

The Holy Spirit lives in me. (1 Corinthians 3:16)

I have access to God's wisdom. (James 1:5)

I am helped by God. (Hebrews 4:16)

I am reconciled to God. (Romans 5:11)

I am not condemned by God. (Romans 8:1)

I am justified. (Romans 5:1)

I have Christ's righteousness. (Romans 5:19; 2 Corinthians 5:21)

I am Christ's ambassador. (2 Corinthians 5:20)

I am completely forgiven. (Colossians 1:14)

I am tenderly loved by God. (Jeremiah 31:3)

I am the sweet fragrance of Christ to God. (2 Corinthians 2:15)

I am a temple in which God dwells. (1 Corinthians 3:16)

I am blameless and beyond reproach. (Colossians 1:22)

I am the salt of the earth. (Matthew 5:13)

I am the light of the world. (Matthew 5:14)

I am a branch on Christ's vine. (John 15:1,5)

I am Christ's friend. (John 15:5)

I am chosen by Christ to bear fruit. (John 15:16)

I am a joint heir with Christ, sharing His inheritance with Him. (Romans 8:17)

I am united to the Lord, one spirit with Him. (1 Corinthians 6:17)

I am a member of Christ's body. (1 Corinthians 12:27)

I am a saint. (Ephesians 1:1)

I am hidden with Christ in God. (Colossians 3:3)

I am chosen by God, holy and dearly loved. (Colossians 3:12)

I am a child of the light. (1 Thessalonians 5:5)

I am holy, and I share in God's heavenly calling. (Hebrews 3:1)

I am sanctified. (Hebrews 2:11)

I am one of God's living stones, being built up in Christ as a spiritual house. (1 Peter 2:5)

I am a member of a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people for God's own possession and created to sing His praises. (1 Peter 2:9-10)

I am firmly rooted and built up in Christ. (Colossians 2:7)

I am born of God, and the evil one cannot touch me. (1 John 5:18)

I have the mind of Christ. (1 Corinthians 2:16)

I may approach God with boldness, freedom, and confidence. (Ephesians 3:12)

I have been rescued from Satan's domain and transferred into the kingdom of Christ. (Colossians 1:13)

I have been made complete in Christ. (Colossians 2:10)

I have been given a spirit of power, love, and self-discipline. (2 Timothy 1:7)

I have been given great and precious promises by God. (2 Peter 1:4)

My needs are met by God. (Philippians 4:19)

I am a prince (princess) in God's kingdom. (John 1:12; 1 Timothy 6:15)

I have been bought with a price, and I belong to God. (1 Corinthians 6:19,20)

I have been adopted as God's child. (Ephesians 1:5)

I have direct access to God through the Holy Spirit. (Ephesians 2:18)

I am assured that all things are working together for good. (Romans 8:28)

I am free from any condemning charges against me. (Romans 8:31f)

I cannot be separated from the love of God. (Romans 8:35f)

I have been established, anointed, and sealed by God. (2 Corinthians 1:21,22)

I am confident that the good work that God has begun in me will be perfected. (Philippians 1:6)

I am a citizen of heaven. (Philippians 3:20)

I am a personal witness of Christ's. (Acts 1:8)

I am God's coworker. (2 Corinthians 6:1, 1 Corinthians 3:9)

I am seated with Christ in the heavenly realm. (Ephesians 2:6)

I am God's workmanship. (Ephesians 2:10)

I can do all things through Christ, who gives me the strength I need. (Philippians 4:13)

menJesus
Mar 11th 2008, 09:13 PM
It seems to me like the devil is coming at you through the area in which you are most vulnerable right now - your illness.

God knows the very thoughts and intents of our hearts. God will not judge you, nor condemn you to hell, for something that you truly cannot stop doing.

That being said, I will pray for you, and let others counsel you further.

RoadWarrior
Mar 11th 2008, 09:41 PM
Hey all, I'm new to this board and am a relatively new Christian (accepted Christ back in November) who (unfortunately) also suffers from Obsessive Compulsive Disorder which took on a troubling form, Scrupulosity :eek:. ... I feel so depressed and alone and that is never a good feeling.

Hi PaleGlow,

Welcome to the board. I am sorry to hear of your suffering, but delighted that you have turned to the Lord. You are heading in the right direction.

First let me state that if you worry about the unpardonable sin, you've not done it. Random thoughts running through your mind do not count as the unpardonable sin. The unpardonable sin is an on-going mindset and hatred of God.

Second let me encourage you to get some balance going in your life. If you are on meds, stay in close contact with your doctor about any changes that you experience, so that your meds can be modified and adjusted as necessary.

Keep a healthy balanced diet, a healthy balance between exercise and rest, and a healthy balance between pursuing your spiritual walk and just having fun doing something light-hearted and happy.

You are in my prayers as you walk through this place. May the Lord grant you His peace. And especially, may He grant you a sense of balance and equiibrium in all things.

Tanya~
Mar 11th 2008, 10:10 PM
Hi MPG,

No, you are not doomed. I can say this with confidence because you know in your heart that Jesus' works were done by the Holy Spirit. Those intrusive thoughts are just that -- unwelcome intrusions.

You are in my prayers. I would encourage you to pray over and meditate on this passage:

Rom 8:31-39

What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? 32 He who did not spare His own Son, but delivered Him up for us all, how shall He not with Him also freely give us all things? 33 Who shall bring a charge against God's elect? It is God who justifies. 34 Who is he who condemns? It is Christ who died, and furthermore is also risen, who is even at the right hand of God, who also makes intercession for us. 35 Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword? 36 As it is written:

"For Your sake we are killed all day long;
We are accounted as sheep for the slaughter."

37 Yet in all these things we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us. 38 For I am persuaded that neither death nor life, nor angels nor principalities nor powers, nor things present nor things to come, 39 nor height nor depth, nor any other created thing , shall be able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.
NKJV

MidnightsPaleGlow
Mar 12th 2008, 02:49 AM
THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR REASSURING ME!!!!!! :)

All today I was pretty much a wreck based on this one point alone:


just today, under my breath, I uttered something that when I realized it was similar to what the Pharisees had said, it immediately terrified me, it was accidental and not intentional

My mind kinda wandered and one of those thoughts went through my mind and unfortunately I uttered it to myself, and let's just say it shocked me back to reality PRONTO :eek:. I pray that God will be with me as I undergo treatment for my anxiety, the reassurances I've received have given me a little peace of mind, at least for the moment. I pray that it will last :pray:, unfortunately for an OCD sufferer, it isn't easy to convince me that I haven't committed it, I guess I was just being delusional all this time then. Just like Satan is my enemy, my own OCD mind is also my own worst enemy, and it's torture when your mind and heart are fighting one another :eek:. Sometimes when I prayed I would have a soothing thought go through my mind telling me that the mind and heart often work against one another, I knew that had to be God talking. Let's just say that I can't wait to finally put this nightmare behind me once and for all. All today I was uttering to myself as the unwanted blasphemy went through my head "The Holy Spirit isn't evil," and "Jesus' works were of the Holy Spirit." I can't help that I'm a little off my rocker, but God Almighty must have had a plan for me if he made me with OCD, and I certainly ain't one to question a work of the almighty :D. It just isn't fun suffering from it when it takes on a faith-based form (Scrupulosity).

Gulah Papyrus
Mar 12th 2008, 03:43 AM
RoadWarrior nailed it. Anyone who commits the unforgivable sin wouldn't be bothered in the least that they had committed it.

I think this verse freaks out a lot of newer Christians, I know it did me.

Here's more on the subject from a few weeks back...

http://bibleforums.org/showthread.php?p=1531497#post1531497

now stop doing this :B:B

and get back to this :pray::pray:
and you will soon be doing this :ppand this :D and maybe even some of this :rofl:!!!

Because you and Jesus will be like this :hug:

peace;)

Sold Out
Mar 12th 2008, 11:34 AM
PS, please don't condemn me, I've been through alot and hope/pray that God won't hold it against me that my mind is troubled, my heart is in the right place, but my mind is tortured. I just don't know anymore. I feel so depressed and alone and that is never a good feeling.

If you are worried that you have committed the unpardonable sin, then you haven't. Rejecting the Holy Spirit's call for salvation is the unpardonable sin (Luke 12), which you have not done.

God knows where you are in your struggle. He forgave you of ALL your sins (past, present, future) when you called on Him to save you. You never have to go to hell because of what Christ did, and your acceptance of that gift. Don't let this be a constant worry for you. You belong to God now and nothing can separate you from Christ.

mcgyver
Mar 12th 2008, 02:10 PM
If you are worried that you have committed the unpardonable sin, then you haven't. Rejecting the Holy Spirit's call for salvation is the unpardonable sin (Luke 12), which you have not done.

God knows where you are in your struggle. He forgave you of ALL your sins (past, present, future) when you called on Him to save you. You never have to go to hell because of what Christ did, and your acceptance of that gift. Don't let this be a constant worry for you. You belong to God now and nothing can separate you from Christ.

I agree, and would add this:

Blasphemy is an attitude of the heart, and a rejection of God by an act of will..

God's grace is sufficient...That is to say that you have been bought by the blood of Christ, and have received that self-same Holy Spirit...He dwells within you.

Therefore, having the attitude of heart which resulted in embracing Christ as your savior (cf Romans 10:9-10), and (obviously) not having rejected God's offer of salvation through Him...You have not, nor can you Blaspheme Him.

A couple of scriptures for you to ponder:

2 Corinthians 5:17, Romans 10:9-10, Romans 8: 35-39, 1 John 1:8-9

Take heart! You belong to Jesus Christ, and He won't let you go! :pp

turtledove
Mar 12th 2008, 03:01 PM
Hi MidnightsPaleGlow, Welcome to the forum! :hug:

Wow, I just read this thread and I see that you have received some excellent counsel on this thread so far. You have shared here that you have professional help and medication and I hope you will continue in therapy. I can see from what you shared that your anxiety and scruples are very real.

God knows how the problem effects you and your thinking processes. Most of all, I believe God knows that your heart is His.


Beyond what many have said here I would encourage you to take some time to meditate on God's word...focusing on edifying scriptures. You could start by using the great list shared in pursuetruth's post here on this thread. Not to just read once but to read more than once and after each passage pray and ask for God's grace and understanding; that you can, indeed, have peace and put on the mind of Christ.

As you focus on scriptures trust God to heal and give grace and strength..it may be a gradual process and sometimes it can be suddenly in little ways.

God's banner over you is love.

I am praying for you.

Peace,

In the Name of Jesus, :pray:

owl

ddmor
Mar 12th 2008, 09:19 PM
I have to agree with everyone here - if you're worried about it, then you haven't committed it. :hug:

Let me give you this verse as a promise you can hold on to that will help you in the future with your fear:

1JN 4:18 There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves torment. But he who fears has not been made perfect in love.

Jesus is the perfect love - and if we hang on to Him - His perfect love will help us get rid of our fear. Read the Bible, pray to Him, sing Him praises - doing all of these will help get rid of that fear!! :hug:

MidnightsPaleGlow
Mar 13th 2008, 07:30 PM
Thanks for the words of encouragement everyone, the thoughts are still popping up time to time, but it seems to be happening less and less, I don't know why but I still feel hurt deep down about this I just hope and pray that God will forgive me, I've been acting very irrational lately, even today, I still felt depressed about this. Something tells me its going to be awhile before I put this ordeal away forever.

Gulah Papyrus
Mar 13th 2008, 08:34 PM
I don't know why but I still feel hurt deep down about this I just hope and pray that God will forgive me
He already has!

grptinHisHand
Mar 13th 2008, 08:47 PM
He already has!
Right! He HAS already done this. Accept His gift of forgiveness. Begin to see yourself the way God sees you. For this go back and reread post #2. Wonderful stuff there - messages God wants you to hear, learn. (Welcome to the forum!)

RoadWarrior
Mar 13th 2008, 08:51 PM
Thanks for the words of encouragement everyone, the thoughts are still popping up time to time, but it seems to be happening less and less, I don't know why but I still feel hurt deep down about this I just hope and pray that God will forgive me, I've been acting very irrational lately, even today, I still felt depressed about this. Something tells me its going to be awhile before I put this ordeal away forever.

You are the best one to observe yourself and recognize when things start going in the wrong direction. When you do see that in yourself, it is good to call your doctor, in case your meds need to be adjusted.

You already have God's forgiveness, and you also have His Holy Spirit to guide you as you grow in your relationship with Him, and in your ability to maintain your health. He loves you just as you are, you don't have to change to please Him. The changes you need to make in your life are about helping you to be more healthy, on your side of the relationship. As you focus on His love for you, you will be encouraged in your faith.

MidnightsPaleGlow
Mar 14th 2008, 11:44 AM
I definitely feel better, it seems that NOBODY who's a believer could commit this sin after all, the spirit would prevent them from doing it.

MidnightsPaleGlow
Mar 16th 2008, 01:38 AM
I have a doctor's appointment coming up this Monday afternoon, keep me in your prayers. Just today, I said something under my breath that I regretted, it had nothing to do with the unpardonable sin, but in a momentary state of depression, I uttered to myself, "Jesus was my savior and I've betrayed him," immediately I was shocked back to reality and went to God in a prayer of repentance saying "Jesus IS my savior." I guess that is something that is very forgivable? I still have alot of anxieties and feel so depressed over what I uttered to myself, I'm not feeling suicidal but there are some times where I wish I was never born. :help:

RoadWarrior
Mar 16th 2008, 01:44 AM
I have a doctor's appointment coming up this Monday afternoon, keep me in your prayers. Just today, I said something under my breath that I regretted, it had nothing to do with the unpardonable sin, but in a momentary state of depression, I uttered to myself, "Jesus was my savior and I've betrayed him," immediately I was shocked back to reality and went to God in a prayer of repentance saying "Jesus IS my savior." I guess that is something that is very forgivable? I still have alot of anxieties and feel so depressed over what I uttered to myself, I'm not feeling suicidal but there are some times where I wish I was never born. :help:

MPG, God is very gracious and quick to forgive! When you feel guilty about something, just tell Him so. Then thank Him for His forgiveness.

I'm glad you are going to the doctor.

:pray:
Dear Lord,

Please go before MPG, and be there in the doctor visit. Help the doctor to hear clearly, to accurately diagnose amd to help in this problem.

RoadWarrior
Mar 16th 2008, 01:47 AM
I have a doctor's appointment coming up this Monday afternoon, keep me in your prayers. Just today, I said something under my breath that I regretted, it had nothing to do with the unpardonable sin, but in a momentary state of depression, I uttered to myself, "Jesus was my savior and I've betrayed him," immediately I was shocked back to reality and went to God in a prayer of repentance saying "Jesus IS my savior." I guess that is something that is very forgivable? I still have alot of anxieties and feel so depressed over what I uttered to myself, I'm not feeling suicidal but there are some times where I wish I was never born. :help:

MPG, God is very gracious and quick to forgive! When you feel guilty about something, just tell Him so. Then thank Him for His forgiveness.

I'm glad you are going to the doctor.

:pray:
Dear Lord,

Please go before MPG, and be there in the doctor visit. Help the doctor to listen and hear clearly, to accurately diagnose and to help in this problem. Give MPG a clear mind to tell the doctor all the symptoms and problems. Make the path clear and straight.

Most of all we ask for Your presence in MPG's life, and your comfort when the thoughts come that would cause depression and guilt. Bring peace that only you can provide.

Amen.

MidnightsPaleGlow
Mar 16th 2008, 02:02 AM
Thanks for that prayer RoadWarrior, it brought me to tears to think about the amount of support I've received from people I don't even know personally. I feel a little bit easier already. Being a person of faith who suffers from a potentially debilitating psychological condition that latched on to my faith life unfairly and unpleasantly is probably the closest thing to hell that I (thankfully, since Jesus saved me from the literal hell) will ever experience.

In his service,
MPG

RoadWarrior
Mar 16th 2008, 02:06 AM
Thanks for that prayer RoadWarrior, it brought me to tears to think about the amount of support I've received from people I don't even know personally. I feel a little bit easier already. Being a person of faith who suffers from a potentially debilitating psychological condition that latched on to my faith life unfairly and unpleasantly is probably the closest thing to hell that I (thankfully, since Jesus saved me from the literal hell) will ever experience.

In his service,
MPG

Dear One, my heart goes out to you. :hug: Illness of any kind is distressing, but some illnesses are harder to deal with than others.

The Name of Jesus has power in times of distress. I like how you repeated that part, "Jesus IS my savior!"

MidnightsPaleGlow
Mar 18th 2008, 11:32 AM
I had my doctor's appointment yesterday, and it went pretty well, the unwanted intrusive thoughts and impulses still remain, but with time it will fade, I'm learning to be bothered by them less and less, it's nothing more than mind noise. I know God cares about the mind, but what I think is more important is that he cares more about where my heart is, the fact that I still have a desire for a relationship with the almighty proves that he hasn't given me over to the dogs. I think Psalm 13:2 speaks for me in this whole situation, "How long must I wrestle with my thoughts and everyday have sorrow in my heart?" The fact that I was having those unpleasant blasphemous thoughts and impulses and it was causing me much distress is proof that I don't have a hard heart like the Pharisees had. Sometimes when one of those thoughts comes into my mind I squint and clench my teeth because its painful to know that I can't control it, but with time it will fade. I'm learning to be bothered by it less and less.

RoadWarrior
Mar 18th 2008, 03:12 PM
I had my doctor's appointment yesterday, and it went pretty well, the unwanted intrusive thoughts and impulses still remain, but with time it will fade, I'm learning to be bothered by them less and less, it's nothing more than mind noise. I know God cares about the mind, but what I think is more important is that he cares more about where my heart is, the fact that I still have a desire for a relationship with the almighty proves that he hasn't given me over to the dogs. I think Psalm 13:2 speaks for me in this whole situation, "How long must I wrestle with my thoughts and everyday have sorrow in my heart?" The fact that I was having those unpleasant blasphemous thoughts and impulses and it was causing me much distress is proof that I don't have a hard heart like the Pharisees had. Sometimes when one of those thoughts comes into my mind I squint and clench my teeth because its painful to know that I can't control it, but with time it will fade. I'm learning to be bothered by it less and less.

Thank you for the update! I can just picture you squinting and clenching your teeth. :hug: Whatever it takes to resist those images, you do it. I love the scripture you quoted. To me the most powerful thing I had in my own early years of being a Christian, was the Word, using verses that the Lord gave me to transform my mind. Like this one ...

Ro 12:2
2 And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.
NKJV

MidnightsPaleGlow
Mar 20th 2008, 12:14 AM
Apparently a developmental condition I suffer from (Asperger's Syndrome) is the root cause of my OCD, as one of the characteristics of the disorder is a narrow field of interest, I was concerned about the unpardonable sin and then, unfortunately, my mind latched onto it unfairly and unpleasantly. However, with prayer, scripture, and counseling, I hope to beat this and get it behind me. God almighty must have had a plan for my life if he made me with that condition. I think of Martin Luther and John Bunyan, they suffered from OCD/scrupulosity as well apparently and were constantly being tortured by unwanted and unpleasant blasphemous thoughts/images/impulses and the fear that they committed the unpardonable sin somehow and were doomed, and look at what they achieved, greatness. I look at those two examples and it shows that promise lies ahead for me after all, who knows, I might start a movement of my own in the faith :idea:.

Amazedgrace21
Mar 20th 2008, 06:17 AM
Hello,
I have just had a chance to read this thread and I so agree with the council you have received and am holding you up in my prayers as well.

I frequent a little market here in PA which is run by the Mennonites and Amish..and one of the most remarkable and very endearing parts of visiting this one are the sweet women who work so hard keeping things in order are often flying through the aisles restocking and organizing everything,and always singing..

They sing joyful, wonderful hymn's as they go about their business, and I often find myself just slowing down and literally joining them in the words and peace they bring me as I shop...and I find myself humming them the rest of the day.:)

You mentoned with your condition that you tend to hyper focus on a thought that tends to get stuck there and brings you so much trouble when it is a painful one.

May I suggest that you find a hymn that gives you particular comfort and allow this to be a way to silence or drown out these type of thoughts..

This came to mind when I read your post and can perhaps remind you, with some comfort as far as God is concerned , your sins are forgiven and you are white as snow..:hug:

Isaiah 1:18 "Come now, and let us reason together," Says the LORD, "Though your sins are like scarlet, They shall be as white as snow; Though they are red like crimson, They shall be as wool.


What can wash away my sin?
Nothing but the blood of Jesus
What can make me whole again?
Nothing but the blood of Jesus.
Oh! precious is the flow
That makes me white as snow;
No other fount I know,
Nothing but the blood of Jesus.
For my pardon, this I see,
Nothing but the blood of Jesus;
For my cleansing this my plea,
Nothing but the blood of Jesus.
Oh! precious is the flow
That makes me white as snow;
No other fount I know,
Nothing but the blood of Jesus.
Nothing can for sin atone,
Nothing but the blood of Jesus;
Naught of good that I have done,
Nothing but the blood of Jesus.
Oh! precious is the flow
That makes me white as snow;
No other fount I know,
Nothing but the blood of Jesus.
This is all my hope and peace,
Nothing but the blood of Jesus;
This is all my righteousness,
Nothing but the blood of Jesus.
Oh! precious is the flow
That makes me white as snow;
No other fount I know,
Nothing but the blood of Jesus.
Now by this I'll overcome--.
Nothing but the blood of Jesus,
Now by this I'll reach my home--;
Nothing but the blood of Jesus.
Oh! precious is the flow
That makes me white as snow;
No other fount I know,
Nothing but the blood of Jesus.
Glory! Glory! This I sing!
Nothing but the blood of Jesus,
All my praise for this I bring!;
Nothing but the blood of Jesus.
Oh! precious is the flow
That makes me white as snow;
No other fount I know,
Nothing but the blood of Jesus.
***********
Go hear a midi file of this inspirational hymn now at: http://www.cyberhymnal.org/htm/n/b/nbtblood.htm (http://www.cyberhymnal.org/htm/n/b/nbtblood.htm)



:hug:

MidnightsPaleGlow
Mar 20th 2008, 11:45 AM
I know that song, we've sung it before in worship service.

RoadWarrior
Mar 20th 2008, 01:16 PM
Apparently a developmental condition I suffer from (Asperger's Syndrome) is the root cause of my OCD, as one of the characteristics of the disorder is a narrow field of interest, I was concerned about the unpardonable sin and then, unfortunately, my mind latched onto it unfairly and unpleasantly. However, with prayer, scripture, and counseling, I hope to beat this and get it behind me. God almighty must have had a plan for my life if he made me with that condition. I think of Martin Luther and John Bunyan, they suffered from OCD/scrupulosity as well apparently and were constantly being tortured by unwanted and unpleasant blasphemous thoughts/images/impulses and the fear that they committed the unpardonable sin somehow and were doomed, and look at what they achieved, greatness. I look at those two examples and it shows that promise lies ahead for me after all, who knows, I might start a movement of my own in the faith :idea:.

Your condition and the symptoms that you suffer are a challenge. But as you realized, God can use even this to bring glory to His kingdom. I like what the next poster suggested, a hymn that you sing in your mind through the day. I have found in times of stress that lines of a song, or verses from the Bible, repeated in my mind have brought me back to stability.

May the Lord grant you a constant sense of His presence in your life.

Amazedgrace21
Mar 20th 2008, 08:40 PM
I know that song, we've sung it before in worship service.

I love this song..please know it was just an example of one of several I often find myself turning to that brings some comfort when I find my own mind doing what I call 'ice skating'..going in circles over and over again with compulsive thoughts because I am simply exhausted and vulnerable.

I have a medical condition where my own brain can and does react to certain stimuli with much racing and hyper focused attention to things..I have simply learned about the mechanics of how this works and when I recognize it is "on board", I have armed myself with strategies to cope with it...to get through valleys of the thought world where I find Satan is very willing to use as opportunities to make things far more complicated or hard than they have to be to put it bluntly...this is his favorite past time and he shamelessly indulges in it.

It has both a medical and spiritual basis for working my friend..there are certain things we can not do at the same time..so the trick is to simply switch gears..have those verses, that armor in place to respond to what we know is part of our circumstances..and makeup to fall back upon and simply let God carry us through these moments.

For me certain songs have a tune, a pattern of music that are deeply associated with the words and the significance they carry to my soul and heart when it comes to how much I love and trust God..because I know He loves me and is so faithful..so instead of allowing me or Satan to to invest my thoughts in the fear and anxieties, I allow God to occupy these places and dwell upon Him , have fellowship with Him through song and praise..sometimes by simply humming a tune while my soul sings along with the words..

If my mind wants to go 'iceskating', I simply deny it junk food and let it dance with the good stuff..things that give me very real joy and comfort and allow God to control the program so to speak..this silences the bad thoughts, it changes channels and it brings me peace..

My kids used to hear me singing in my sleep..I do this on auto-pilot in my sleep apparently!..:pp

Satan is a liar and one of his tactics is to try to invade and rub salt in wounds that get us to react, and allow these reactions to build up in their patterns and depth of feelings..God on the other hand instructs us to guardour thoughts, allow Him and His words to reign in our hearts. so that we may be healed, comforted and strengthened by them..

I simply did the math..and what God offers is what I want..and is also what I need, so I have learned to rely upon this and tell Satan to shove off and take his business elsewhere.

I hope this offers you something to try and that it may help you as it has helped me..:hug: All you need to do is find the scripture that is your "rock" and anchor a song of praise that has a tune that 'sticks'..and allow it to become part of you , and simply turn that switch on or allow God to when you need it most to let your soul and mind be filled with the Holy Spirit and make those other thoughts and their hold on you brain to be squelshed and silenced.

MidnightsPaleGlow
Mar 21st 2008, 02:24 AM
I personally think the father of lies knew it was on my mind and that I had some concerns about it, and then, next thing you know, he plants it into my mind and my Asperger's/OCD latched onto it and I couldn't let it go, over the last 2 months, Satan has been beating me up with this and my own mind was being forceably raped against my own will, and it turned into a stressful, depressing, and terrifying ordeal, that as I stated before, actually involved a psychiatric ER visit for a day which was no fun at all :(, I remember breaking down crying telling the doctors about my faith life and how I had uttered something that I thought might have constituted the "unpardonable sin" and was doomed to hell, and how I couldn't stop the intrusive thoughts/impulses. I still have the intrusive thoughts and impulses (though not as severe as before) even though I've been on meds for almost a whole month, I know today I was uttering some stuff to myself and then next thing you know, I feared that I might have said something (under my breath, not out loud) that was along the lines of what the unpardonable sin constituted, and I promptly went into prayer/repentance mode, but felt so down afterward, and then I remembered, "If you fear that you have committed the unpardonable sin, then you haven't committed it." Of course I'm still going to have some concerns about it once this ordeal is over, but from my understanding it's not a single event that someone feels remorse for, but a series of events rejecting the testimony of the Holy Spirit and can only be committed by nonbelievers, like the Pharisees, who saw genuinely divine miracles, yet delibrately and without remorse, chose to call it satanic. The thing that I think makes it unpardonable is not that the Pharisees COULDN'T repent, it's just that they WOULDN'T, they were so hard-hearted that the Holy Spirit wouldn't be able to work on them.

RoadWarrior
Mar 21st 2008, 02:40 AM
..., and I promptly went into prayer/repentance mode, but felt so down afterward, and then I remembered, "If you fear that you have committed the unpardonable sin, then you haven't committed it." Of course I'm still going to have some concerns about it once this ordeal is over, but from my understanding it's not a single event that someone feels remorse for, but a series of events rejecting the testimony of the Holy Spirit and can only be committed by nonbelievers, like the Pharisees, who saw genuinely divine miracles, yet delibrately and without remorse, chose to call it satanic. The thing that I think makes it unpardonable is not that the Pharisees COULDN'T repent, it's just that they WOULDN'T, they were so hard-hearted that the Holy Spirit wouldn't be able to work on them.

MPG, I thought of you today when I heard a sermon on my iPod, by Charles Stanley. He says that it would not be possible today to commit the "unpardonable" sin, that it could only happen when Jesus walked on the earth and did miracles by the Holy Spirit. So what you say above, (I highlighted it in blue) is correct according to Charles Stanley.

The only unforgiveable thing, he said, is for a person to reject Jesus as savior, right up unto death, and go into eternity rejecting Him. So we already know that you do not fall into that category.

:pp

You know, this teaching by Dr. Stanley is the most clear I have ever heard on this subject.

:hug:

MidnightsPaleGlow
Mar 21st 2008, 02:56 AM
I don't know, I think it might still be possible, say someone saw a bad car accident where it looks like the person would have died, but they walk away uninjured, most people would say "God was watching out for that person," but someone with a hard, evil heart like the Pharisees would probably go "oh, that was satanic." Not likely that it would be like that, but possible, maybe. It seems like it takes ALOT to truly commit the sin of the Pharisees, the Pharisees were so stooped in their wickedness that they had turned against the revelation of God, reviled Jesus with such zeal that they were opposing him fanatically, and then called the Holy Spirit of God, the unclean spirit of Satan. At that point, nothing could possibly change their minds. I know J. Vernon McGee shared the same point of view as Charles Stanley, that that was a specific circumstance that is no longer valid.

MidnightsPaleGlow
Mar 21st 2008, 01:37 PM
I think a good book (aside from the "Good Book" known as the bible) for my situation would be John Bunyan's Grace Abounding to the Chief of Sinners. He suffered the exact same mental anguish when he feared that he had committed the unpardonable sin just like I feared I had. He discovered, just like me, that his fear was irrational, and that God is willing to forgive the smallest and largest sins, I gotta get my hands on a copy of that book.

RoadWarrior
Mar 21st 2008, 03:00 PM
I think a good book (aside from the "Good Book" known as the bible) for my situation would be John Bunyan's Grace Abounding to the Chief of Sinners. He suffered the exact same mental anguish when he feared that he had committed the unpardonable sin just like I feared I had. He discovered, just like me, that his fear was irrational, and that God is willing to forgive the smallest and largest sins, I gotta get my hands on a copy of that book.

Have you checked the library? This sounds like a good idea, to read a book by someone who suffered the same aflliction. In fact, I'm impressed that you know that about John Bunyan.

You sound like you are a very smart person.

MidnightsPaleGlow
Mar 21st 2008, 06:20 PM
Oh no, I am highly intelligent, when I was researching whether my fears were justified or not, that's how I found out about John Bunyan suffering from the same thing that I went through. My condition (Asperger's) is unique in the sense that it impairs my social functioning and creates a narrow field of interest in certain areas, but leaves me with a high level of intelligence. Unfortunately, depression and anxiety disorders are co-morbid with what I suffer from. Technically, and apparently, my condition is actually an autistic spectrum disorder in the sense that it impairs my social functioning and creates narrow fields of interest, but is high functioning in the sense that it leaves me with an unusually high level of intellect, it's both a curse and a blessing.

RoadWarrior
Mar 21st 2008, 06:46 PM
Oh no, I am highly intelligent, when I was researching whether my fears were justified or not, that's how I found out about John Bunyan suffering from the same thing that I went through. My condition (Asperger's) is unique in the sense that it impairs my social functioning and creates a narrow field of interest in certain areas, but leaves me with a high level of intelligence. Unfortunately, depression and anxiety disorders are co-morbid with what I suffer from. Technically, and apparently, my condition is actually an autistic spectrum disorder in the sense that it impairs my social functioning and creates narrow fields of interest, but is high functioning in the sense that it leaves me with an unusually high level of intellect, it's both a curse and a blessing.

Yes I can see that. I had done a little bit of googling on Asperger's after you mentioned it. Mostly what I came across was for parents of children who have it. But it gave me a bit of insight.

Whenever a person has any kind of affliction, whether mental, physical, emotional, etc., that has been diagnosed and has a name, they have a starting place to get a grip on the problem. Some things cannot be cured, but there are ways to cope with them, and to live with them. You sound like you are doing the right thing, using your intellect to help yourself.

One thing I found in my brief research, which I have already suggested to you, is that rhythm is useful, along with rote learning. I'm sure you already knew that. ;)

What was interesting to me about your question on tongues, was that it was "singing" that you were doing. And it helped you to feel calm and peaceful, even joyous.

God knows that you have this condition, but He has provided for you the ability to cope with it. And He is providing for you the tools that you need.

I'm glad that you are here on the board, you can always ask your questions and also ask for prayer when you need it.

MidnightsPaleGlow
Mar 25th 2008, 05:33 PM
Yesterday, I thought I might have mis-spoken again. I've been feeling down since last night, and just a few minutes ago, in a fit of depression, I yelled to God, "Heavenly Father, I curse the day that I was born and I dread where I'm going, why don't you just end it for me now and send me to hell, since you're probably going to send me there anyway!" I don't want to go to hell, but I can't seem to shake this delusion that I'm somehow condemned. However, I felt a tingle go down from my head to my toes, was that the Comforter trying to calm my nerves? I'm concerned that since I yelled out to God to send me to hell, that he might do just that :eek:. I went over and pet my cats, and said to one of them, "I envy you because your eternal future is probably better than my own."

daughter
Mar 25th 2008, 05:35 PM
Job also cursed the day he was born... do you doubt his salvation?

MidnightsPaleGlow
Mar 25th 2008, 08:43 PM
Job also cursed the day he was born... do you doubt his salvation?

No, not at all. I know I still have doubts that something I say, do, or think might constitute the unpardonable sin and I might not even know it. So naturally, you can see why I've been a wreck.

Tanya~
Mar 25th 2008, 08:48 PM
Hi MPG,

When you are tempted to curse, rather than do so in anger, try to redirect those emotions and make your prayer a plea for help. Don't give up and keep asking for help. Learn to put your trust in Him, and He will show Himself faithful to you.

MidnightsPaleGlow
Mar 26th 2008, 02:15 AM
All today was pretty much a down day for me, I prayed, and as I was praying, I felt myself being lifted back up, only to fall back down after the prayer was through. I kept rebuking Satan but just couldn't lift myself back up, I felt so down today. I feel like I'm a hopeless case.

RoadWarrior
Mar 26th 2008, 03:09 AM
All today was pretty much a down day for me, I prayed, and as I was praying, I felt myself being lifted back up, only to fall back down after the prayer was through. I kept rebuking Satan but just couldn't lift myself back up, I felt so down today. I feel like I'm a hopeless case.

MPG, think back over your day.

Did you get enough sleep?
Did you get some exercise?
Did you eat the right foods today?
Did you drink enough water?
Did you listen to music that you like, or sing your favorite hymns?
Did you read in your Bible today?
Did you do something fun/something that you like to do?


All of these things are important for each of us. If we eat too much sugar for example, or don't get enough protein and vegetables, it can contribute to feeling down. It is even more important for someone who struggles with issues of unbalance in their health.

Tanya~
Mar 26th 2008, 03:25 AM
MPG,

Maybe you don't need to rebuke Satan. Personally, I never do that. What I do is ask the Lord to do it for me. Personally I find this more effective.

In what is commonly called The Lord's Prayer, part of it asks God to 'deliver us from the evil one:"

Matt 6:9-13
9 In this manner, therefore, pray:

Our Father in heaven,
Hallowed be Your name.
10 Your kingdom come.
Your will be done
On earth as it is in heaven.
11 Give us this day our daily bread.
12 And forgive us our debts,
As we forgive our debtors.
13 And do not lead us into temptation,
But deliver us from the evil one.
For Yours is the kingdom and the power and the glory forever. Amen.
NKJV

You can personalize that for yourself, and ask the Lord to deliver you from the evil one. Another thing that I have found very helpful in the past is to use Psalm 91 as a prayer to God. What you do is you read through the psalm and as you do, go ahead and personalize it, turn it into a prayer. Whatever parts relate to you, you can pray to the Lord. Be persistent and don't give up. When you are weak, tell Him and ask Him to take over and fight the battle for you.

Ex 15:2-3
2 The LORD is my strength and song,
And He has become my salvation;
He is my God, and I will praise Him;
My father's God, and I will exalt Him.
3 The LORD is a man of war;
The LORD is His name.
NKJV

I'm praying for you too, MPG.

MidnightsPaleGlow
Apr 3rd 2008, 02:54 AM
I had a great revelation about the unpardonable sin recently and I figured I would share it, that way other people can be relieved of the same fear that gripped me and refused to let go.

What is it? Is it simply attributing a work of the Holy Spirit to the devil? Is it a final rejection of God's offer of salvation? Here is what my revelation concerning it entails (NOTE: All citations are NIV for simplicity's sake):

"He who is not with me is against me, and he who does not gather with me scatters. And so I tell you, every sin and blasphemy will be forgiven men, but the blasphemy against the Spirit will not be forgiven. Anyone who speaks a word against the Son of Man will be forgiven, but anyone who speaks against the Holy Spirit will not be forgiven, either in this age or in the age to come (Matt. 12:30-32)."

In verse 30, we see that Jesus explicitly states "He who is not with me is against me." I can tie this passage into John 3:36: "Whoever believes in the Son has eternal life, but whoever rejects the Son will not see life, for God's wrath remains on him." So you're either saved from the wrath of God by believing in his Son, or you're still under judgment and wrath.

"If God were your Father, you would love me, for I came from God and now am here. I have not come on my own; but he sent me. Why is my language not clear to you? Because you are unable to hear what I say. You belong to your father, the devil, and you want to carry out your father's desire. He was a murderer from the beginning, not holding to the truth, for there is no truth in him. When he lies, he speaks his native language, for he is a liar and the father of lies (John 8:42-44)." Looking at John 8:42-44, we can draw a parallel by jumping back to Matthew 12:34-35: "You brood of vipers, how can you who are evil say anything good? For out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks. The good man brings good things out of the good stored up in him, and the evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in him."

One Lutheran scholar (whose name I forget at the moment), said that "this sin is Satanic," and I have to agree with him. It seems to truly commit this sin, you would have to be (as Stephen John Spencer states) "born again of the devil." You would have to be so wicked and depraved that it's not that you COULDN'T repent, it's just that you WOULDN'T repent, when one is so stooped in wickedness and depravity, there's little chance that anything can turn them around possibly, revealing that that person's true father is, as Jesus states in John 8:44, "the devil." So obviously, it's not a one-time act that someone later feels remorse for, but the end result of a hardness of heart of disturbing proportions where the Holy Spirit would not possibly be able to enact a change on that person, rendering them hopelessly lost. I forgot where I read it, but I read a story about a guy who in his time away from the Lord (was a backslidden Christian at the time), was acting irrationally one day in a fit of rage, and, determined to damn himself, ran outside and yelled to the sky at God himself the same thing the Pharisees had said about Jesus, that he did his work not by the power of the Holy Spirit, but Satan. When he came back to reality, he was terrified and worried about what he had done, which proved that he hadn't committed it, the Pharisees weren't acting irrationally, but delibrately, they didn't mis-speak, it wasn't an accidental utterance, it was a delibrate, calculated assault on the testimony of the Holy Spirit, because the Pharisees were inherently "children of the devil." Remember, Satan tries to masquerade as an angel of light, those Pharisees were "religious leaders (or so they claimed)," but their hearts were far from God (Mark 7:6-7). That's the unpardonable sin in a nutshell, it's the end result of being inherently vicious and evil at heart, to the point where repentance is not possible. So I myself know that I'm far from that point, the fact that I worry that every word and/or deed I do might constitute it, shows that I'm nowhere near committing it, and when I FEAR, I might have, through my asking for forgiveness and turning from it (as best as I can despite my mental affliction), it proves that I haven't done it, WHEW! If only this revelation came to me sooner, it would have saved me a lot of grief and unnecessary agony.

RoadWarrior
Apr 3rd 2008, 04:46 AM
How wonderful, MPG, that you have received that enlightenment! Praise God!

turtledove
Apr 3rd 2008, 03:02 PM
MPG, God is so good to help you see this. I like the way you explained it too. :amen:

Peace and blessings,

wiseoldowl

TMeeks
Apr 11th 2008, 01:20 PM
The Bible tells us that all good things come from God. To me, this includes any new discoveries that help mankind no matter where they seem to come from. There is no medication that has not come from something that God provided already on this earth.

The Fall left all of us with bodies that can have medical problems. We take heart medications when the heart is affected and diabetes medications for blood-sugar problems. The brain, like other organs may need medications from time to time to help it maintain chemical balance.

The brain is divided into different areas and one of those is the 'cingulate'. When there are abnormalities in this area people can become fixated on something and have difficulty switching their focus easily. SPECT scans of brain activity have been able to map these abnormalities and results consistently.

Spiritually, it is helpful to understand that the Holy Spirit is IN you when you become a Christian. And, the Holy Spirit goes through, with you, everything you experience. The difference is that God knows exactly why you experience the troubling things that you experience and you don't. So, if anyone is going to be understanding of your pain and fears, it is the Holy Spirit. So, the first thing I would suggest is that you rest in the fact that God understands better than you do what is happening.

So, I am going to pray with you this prayer.

Lord, you know that I am troubled by some of the thoughts that come to me and, yet, you have not abandoned me. I think you so much for your love and for your faithfulness. I ask you that each time these thoughts come to me that it will remind me of your marvelous love and constant presence so that I may praise Your name and the name of my wonderful Saviour, Jesus.

When these thoughts come to you. They generate chemicals that bring stress and anxiety. To counter them, it's helpful to think thoughts that generate the kind of chemicals that bring a smile to your face. The simpler the thought, the more likely we are to remember to do this when we are anxious. So, perhaps you could pray this each time. Right now, as you read this and pray it, pay attention to your body's reaction. Is it calming. Does it being a smile? If not, make up your own short prayer that does make you smile and give you peace. Here is one to start with. But, remember. Keep it short. God knows everything already. This prayer is simply to praise and thank Him, calming your mind as you rest in Jesus.

Lord, I am so thankful for your forgiveness and love. I praise you.

TMeeks
Apr 11th 2008, 01:39 PM
Yesterday, I thought I might have mis-spoken again. I've been feeling down since last night, and just a few minutes ago, in a fit of depression, I yelled to God, "Heavenly Father, I curse the day that I was born and I dread where I'm going, why don't you just end it for me now and send me to hell, since you're probably going to send me there anyway!" I don't want to go to hell, but I can't seem to shake this delusion that I'm somehow condemned. However, I felt a tingle go down from my head to my toes, was that the Comforter trying to calm my nerves? I'm concerned that since I yelled out to God to send me to hell, that he might do just that :eek:. I went over and pet my cats, and said to one of them, "I envy you because your eternal future is probably better than my own."

Stop and think about this, MidnightsPaleGlow.

The God that is in you in the person of the Holy Spirit, is the same God that can hold a billion galaxies each have billions of suns without so much as flinching. And, He is the God that created the smallest particles that make up all matter and doesn't need bifocals to see them and control them.

If God can work in those extremes, don't you think he know EXACTLY how Aspergers affects a person's mind? Do you REALLY think a God that SO BIG that He pays attention to the tiniest details, is going to be thrown by something so small as a little defect in the mind of one of His children? You are right, any thoughts of condemnation ARE just delusions... and, delusions might SEEM real. But, they are NOT the truth. This next promise is no delusion... it is real. It is God's promise to you.

Hebrews 13:5 ... God has said, "Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you."


We had a cat that we absolutely loved. But, she had apparently been abused before we got her and HATED boots. We simply assumed that she had been kicked by someone with boots on and that is why she reacted so violently toward men's boots. Did we get angry with her? Did we reject her? No! Because we understood. And, if we, who have so little understanding compared to God, can do that for a Cat, then you KNOW that God completely and absolutely understands your condition and your TRUE heart.

There is another book that you might find helpful. It's called "Who Switched Off My Brain (http://www.drleaf.net)" by Dr. Caroline Leaf. Here is a review (http://wbc1967.blogspot.com). Anyone having Aspergers is going to face a lot of rejection and negative comments by people that don't understand. This book will be a big help in showing you how, with the Holy Spirit guiding you, to take negative thoughts and feeling captive and replace those negative 'fear' thoughts with positive 'faith' thoughts.

MidnightsPaleGlow
Apr 12th 2008, 02:37 AM
I know recently I shot back at Satan with Romans 8:1, and 1 John 1:7 and 1:9 when he came at me with this again a few days ago. Based on how I explained it in that (quite long) earlier post, I can NEVER commit that since I wasn't "born again of the devil," but of the Spirit of God, it takes a truly wicked heart to commit that sin since that sin is SATANIC. I know lately my OCD has been moving towards this irrational fear of accidentally selling my soul to the devil, but with time, I hope all of this will come to pass.

MidnightsPaleGlow
Apr 12th 2008, 02:41 AM
I recently bought a book called The Doubting Disease, written exclusively to help Christians who suffer from Scrupulosity like I do, I'm gonna start reading it and implementing some of the strategies in it.

TMeeks
Apr 12th 2008, 02:55 PM
I know recently I shot back at Satan with Romans 8:1, and 1 John 1:7 and 1:9 when he came at me with this again a few days ago. Based on how I explained it in that (quite long) earlier post, I can NEVER commit that since I wasn't "born again of the devil," but of the Spirit of God, it takes a truly wicked heart to commit that sin since that sin is SATANIC. I know lately my OCD has been moving towards this irrational fear of accidentally selling my soul to the devil, but with time, I hope all of this will come to pass.

While thinking about a related issue, brains damaged in a way that leaves people prone to anger, I realized that God's method of salvation, pure grace through faith in Jesus Christ is much more marvelous a gift for mankind than I ever imagined.

Our salvation is not based on works. But, neither is it negated by symptoms and repercussions of brain abnormalities. God understands the brain and the repercussions of every single thing that could possibly go wrong in the brain. While all of us are called to live in complete obedience, to the best of our abilities, our salvation rests at a level FAR above that. It rests in the person and work of Jesus Christ and that is ALL it rests on.

I'm a human being, but when I had a student that had a brain condition that meant they could not write answers that they knew, I had them take their tests verbally. If I, as a person with no understanding of why that child had those symptom, could make allowances for that deficiency, then how could a God that DOES know, not also make allowances for whatever the results of these conditions?

He did. He made our salvation NOT rest on the soundness of every minute of our brains. He made our salvation rest entirely on Himself, His Son and the Holy Spirit. Praise God for that wonderful thoughtfulness.

inside out
Apr 12th 2008, 07:29 PM
You are not alone. I have been diagnosed with OCD. It sounds ridiculous, but I carry a pocket sized Bible with many promises tagged for the times when my mind just will not let go of a terrible/terrifying thought. I also listen to CDs that are the Word put to music...ie Sons of Kora to and from work. The music is odd, but I find that it is comforting to hear those words throughout the day....since my mind tends to replay whatever I hear. I am very careful about what movies, tv shows and novels I read. I hope this helps. I truly hurt for you. I will pray for you. God has been faithful to comfort me...even if it is not immediate relief....He is always there.

MidnightsPaleGlow
Apr 12th 2008, 09:55 PM
You are not alone. I have been diagnosed with OCD. It sounds ridiculous, but I carry a pocket sized Bible with many promises tagged for the times when my mind just will not let go of a terrible/terrifying thought. I also listen to CDs that are the Word put to music...ie Sons of Kora to and from work. The music is odd, but I find that it is comforting to hear those words throughout the day....since my mind tends to replay whatever I hear. I am very careful about what movies, tv shows and novels I read. I hope this helps. I truly hurt for you. I will pray for you. God has been faithful to comfort me...even if it is not immediate relief....He is always there.

That's exactly what I've been doing too. I carry around a pocket-sized KJV and lately when I'm driving I've been playing a CD of various songs from Sovereign Grace Ministries, as well as listening to a great sermon that our preacher gave called "Weakened Warrior" that really had an impact on me, I find what I'm doing a great source of strengthening for those times when you feel like your faith is collapsing and needs to be re-energized.

TMeeks
Apr 17th 2008, 03:11 PM
That's exactly what I've been doing too. I carry around a pocket-sized KJV and lately when I'm driving I've been playing a CD of various songs from Sovereign Grace Ministries, as well as listening to a great sermon that our preacher gave called "Weakened Warrior" that really had an impact on me, I find what I'm doing a great source of strengthening for those times when you feel like your faith is collapsing and needs to be re-energized.
You might also check out 'Prayer to Go (http://www.prayertogo.com)' which has God Centered prayers that you can download to an iPod. Actually, I think the 'Kids' prayers are among the best on the site, since they simply focus on the person and work of Christ in the clearest terms.

MidnightsPaleGlow
Apr 22nd 2008, 12:25 PM
Everything has come into perspective looking back at how this dilemma began for me. I figure one way of healing and moving forward is to examine where the ordeal began and where it ended. I remember it actually began in a moment of confusion, where, desperate not to be deceived by Satan, I confused what might have been a work of God as being a trick of the devil (in my mind) and thought to myself almost immediately afterwards "Oh no, if that was from God, I've done the unpardonable." Then came the intrusive thoughts related to what the Pharisees had said and the thoughts were unstoppable. But after doing much scripture analysis and seeking reassurance, I can now put this nightmare behind me once and for all. No harm can come upon me now that I belong to J.C. Since I've accepted Christ, the opportunity to actually commit the unpardonable sin is forever in the past.

RoadWarrior
Apr 22nd 2008, 02:58 PM
Everything has come into perspective looking back at how this dilemma began for me. I figure one way of healing and moving forward is to examine where the ordeal began and where it ended. I remember it actually began in a moment of confusion, where, desperate not to be deceived by Satan, I confused what might have been a work of God as being a trick of the devil (in my mind) and thought to myself almost immediately afterwards "Oh no, if that was from God, I've done the unpardonable." Then came the intrusive thoughts related to what the Pharisees had said and the thoughts were unstoppable. But after doing much scripture analysis and seeking reassurance, I can now put this nightmare behind me once and for all. No harm can come upon me now that I belong to J.C. Since I've accepted Christ, the opportunity to actually commit the unpardonable sin is forever in the past.


Yay, hooray! :hug: I am thrilled to read this. You are doing the right thing by "much scripture analysis". This is the key for every Christian in every struggle that we have. We can go back to the Bible and seek to hear what God is saying to us. His love for us is so great, and just knowing that is healing to our souls.

I pray you a special blessing today, MPG.

MidnightsPaleGlow
Apr 22nd 2008, 05:35 PM
I don't know why but it still seems to come back to me time to time, just obsessive thinking and worry and fear that I might in some way do it and not realize it. The scripture analysis seems to calm my uneasy conscience only short-term, I wonder if I might be developing Post-Traumatic Stress from this ordeal since it was very stressful and terrifying. Only time can tell.

Love Child
Apr 26th 2008, 11:40 PM
Praise the Lord midnightglowpaw.
I just wanted to tell you that I had the same problem myself. You did not blaspheme take it for me. before I got saved I had a blasphemous spirit on me that forced me to speak all kinds of blasphemies. But I nevered commited the unforgivable sin. But one day some demons took over my conscience mind to the point where I was kinda out of it so I can commit the unforgivable sin. and in the middle of my sentance The Lord allowed me to regain my conscieness in the very very VERY NICK OF TIME!!!, and when I say the nick I mean the nick of time within a second. I broke down and cried to the Lord begging him for forgivness. I ended up recieving the Holy Spirit not too long afterwards. But I ended up with a case of Scurpulosity. I just recently got over the case of Scurpulosity. In order to blaspheme the Holy Ghost you would have to: say it, mean, it can't be half of you, and you would have to be fully conscienced. KNOW THIS: not all of your thoughts belong to you, there is an endless stream of thoughts in the human mind. AND TAKE IT FROM ME that the Devil can say things in your mind and make it seem like it is you saying them. I know very well what you are going through so I am going to tell it to you like this- Don't think of a pokadotted elephant. What was the first thing that came into your mind when I said that. when you try not to think of something you will think of it. you are allowing your mind to drift off in the spirit world so keep your mind on other things like: politics, classic tv shows, movies, ect.

I hope my testimony will help you futher, or I at lest hope that it will help someone else in the future, God Bless

Love Child
Apr 26th 2008, 11:52 PM
I know lately my OCD has been moving towards this irrational fear of accidentally selling my soul to the devil, but with time, I hope all of this will come to pass.[/quote]

Man I am telling you, you are going through the same thing that I was going through, God properly have a special calling in your life. before I had a demons that cased me blaspheme uncontrolably, but never against the Holy Ghost, I had demons that was trying to make me say I sell my soul to the devil. I could not sleep at night, and I was trouble through out the day. satin allowed program after program to come on tv that was based on selling souls. Take it from me, it is imposible to sell your because your soul do not belong to you. All satin is trying to do is toy with you just for the HELL of it- liturally!
Selling your soul is just something they made up on tv.