PDA

View Full Version : Marriage, divorce, and re-marriage.



Clavicula_Nox
Jun 18th 2008, 06:21 PM
So my fiance is divorced, due to physical, mental, and emotional abuse etc. We have spoken, many times, about this and because she is a good person she feels horrible about the divorce, necessity or not. She is particularly hard on herself and feels that she is somehow in this unforgivable state, simply because she got a divorce. I have tried, citing various verses, that although divorce is wrong there is simply no such thing as being "unforgivable."

She has asked me to start a thread on here to get some differing opinions and insight on this matter. I have tried to explain to her that divorce is a bad thing, but that it isn't something to ruin her salvation, but it's like she either filters out what I say, or ignores it altogether because her responses always make it seem like I didn't say anything.

Seeker of truth
Jun 18th 2008, 06:35 PM
As someone who has had multiple marriages before I was a Christian I'll tell you if we repent we are forgiven.

As soon as I became a Christian I told the Lord I will not ever treat marriage as a casual thing ever again, and I haven't.

Clavicula_Nox
Jun 18th 2008, 06:54 PM
That's the thing, she doesn't treat it like a casual thing. She tried very hard to go to marriage counseling, despite the many things he did to her. Eventually the divorce proceeded because he met someone else while they were seperated. Without a doubt, she doesn't treat it casually.

Seeker of truth
Jun 18th 2008, 06:57 PM
That's the thing, she doesn't treat it like a casual thing. She tried very hard to go to marriage counseling, despite the many things he did to her. Eventually the divorce proceeded because he met someone else while they were seperated. Without a doubt, she doesn't treat it casually.

I didn't mean to insinuate she did and I apologize if it sounded that way.

I believe if she repented she was forgiven. Divorce is not pleasing to God. My second divorce was due to an abusive situation but I still repented.

Some divorce may be beyond our control (such as abandomnent or adultry).

Clavicula_Nox
Jun 18th 2008, 07:02 PM
Well, Matthew 19 gives what is sometimes called the "Exemption clause," for adultery and I tried reading to her about a Christian's body being a Temple and to avoid and separate oneself from those who would destroy that temple.

None of it means anything to her. I have tried telling her about repentance and forgiveness, and it doesn't even phase her. She continues on like I didn't say anything. She asks me for verses, scripture, or anything, and when I read word for word, she argues because it isn't what she wanted to hear, or because it doesn't say "Meagan, your divorce was okay." or anything like that.

It's so frustrating.

Seeker of truth
Jun 18th 2008, 07:07 PM
Well, Matthew 19 gives what is sometimes called the "Exemption clause," for adultery and I tried reading to her about a Christian's body being a Temple and to avoid and separate oneself from those who would destroy that temple.

None of it means anything to her. I have tried telling her about repentance and forgiveness, and it doesn't even phase her. She continues on like I didn't say anything. She asks me for verses, scripture, or anything, and when I read word for word, she argues because it isn't what she wanted to hear, or because it doesn't say "Meagan, your divorce was okay." or anything like that.

It's so frustrating.

It sounds like it needs to be left between she and the Lord :hug: If nothing you say comforts her it may cause a rift between the two of you if you persist. The Lord will comfort her as He knows her heart.

I'll keep this in prayer :pray:

Fenris
Jun 18th 2008, 07:41 PM
My wife was divorced when I met her.

She tells me she was 'getting ready for me'. I like that.:)

Clavicula_Nox
Jun 18th 2008, 07:52 PM
:) That's really nice, buddy, Meagan thought so too.

daughter
Jun 18th 2008, 07:52 PM
I also have a failed marriage behind me. In my case it's because my ex refused to tell his parents that he'd married me, pulled the wedding ring off my finger when they turned up unexpectedly, and treated me very badly in other ways too.

It's obvious to me that God blessed my marriage with Neil, who I think of as my real husband... because he loved me, acknowledged me, and was a man instead of a boy.

Perhaps we have to admit that although some marriages fail, God can work with that failure, and never lets go. Remember David and Bathsheba. At one point Bathsheba was Uriah's wife, then after repentance she is described as David's wife. Look how God blessed that union... if God can raise a Solomon out of a relationship which started in sin, why can't He similarly bless survivors of divorce?

Pray for her to find God's peace, and trust Him to forgive... I will too.

ProjectPeter
Jun 18th 2008, 08:20 PM
Hey man... tell her to read this from me... Ken... the stuffiest jerk on the board.

Philippians 3:13 *Brethren, I do not regard myself as having laid hold of it yet; but one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and reaching forward to what lies ahead,
14 *I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.


It's past. Done. Doesn't matter now. Repent if you did stuff wrong to help bring it about... even do what David did and say you know God... if there was stuff deep down in me that I am not even aware... forgive me of that. Then be done with it. Let it go and you two get married already. ;) It is getting old seeing you talk about your fiance!

cnw
Jun 18th 2008, 10:22 PM
In the N.T. there are some pretty specific verses that deal with divorce, but as many of us want to feel free to marry again even if things turn out wonderful (especially because we aren't being abused anymore) it doesn't make remarriage right.
If he was not saved and left her the Bible says she is not bound.
I don't know what that means and I don't think many do because it isn't expounded on. We could guess all we want to.
The Bible says if you marry a divorced woman you cause her to commit adultry. You can't repent of this because you will commit it again, so I don't know how this works either. When you are married to another man the OT says you can't ever go back to your first husband because that is adultry. There are lots of divorced women out here and they have remarried and I haven't met one yet that has said they were wrong to get remarried or asked for forgiveness for being sexually active or willing to stop. I suppose that the Matthew verses would go the same for a man who was divorced and then remarried.
If she feels burdened, then by all means let the Spirit speak to her. She has a burden to bear.
What she shouldn't do is feel she failed because she had a man who chose self over the righteousness of God and love for his wife. She should poor herself in the love of God and if your relationship in any way shape of form is not in uttmost righteousness and holiness, she is guilty.
Uriah was dead therefore nulifying the marriage to him, but Bathsheba paid with her first child dying. There is not an example of divorce that I know of, except the woman at the well and she had 5 husbands and lived with one and Jesus told her to stop living in sin. he never expounded.

Steve509
Jun 19th 2008, 12:18 AM
in todays society it is difficult to find someone that has not committed the sin of sexual immorality.

unless you marry as a vigin, never stray, and never divorce, you cannot escape that sin. unless of course your spouse dies. and if you do divorce, you can never have sex or re-marry. not many of us meet those standards.

Jesus said something to the affect that if you look upon someone with lust you have already committed adultery in you heart. i'm not really sure when attraction becomes lust, but i would never claim to not have looked upon someone with lust.

i do think if he was having sex outside the marriage, she might have a "loop hole."

cnw
Jun 19th 2008, 02:10 AM
yes, Steve that is right, so as Romans 6 says -shall we continue in sin that grace may abound??? God forbid.
fornication and lusting are different than marriage.
I thought of something else. God divorced Isreal but took her back. He did it because of their idolotry.

9Marksfan
Jun 19th 2008, 09:55 AM
Well, Matthew 19 gives what is sometimes called the "Exemption clause," for adultery and I tried reading to her about a Christian's body being a Temple and to avoid and separate oneself from those who would destroy that temple.

None of it means anything to her. I have tried telling her about repentance and forgiveness, and it doesn't even phase her. She continues on like I didn't say anything. She asks me for verses, scripture, or anything, and when I read word for word, she argues because it isn't what she wanted to hear, or because it doesn't say "Meagan, your divorce was okay." or anything like that.

It's so frustrating.

Can I ask - who did the divorcing? Her or her ex?

Clavicula_Nox
Jun 19th 2008, 01:12 PM
Can I ask - who did the divorcing? Her or her ex?

She separated after he bashed her over the head with a chair, but tried for 3-4 months to seek marriage counseling. He was also court-ordered to attend some individual counseling, which he did not do, and after 2 or 3 sessions of marriage counseling, he quit that too. In the end, he filed for divorce and paid for it, but she separated from him, but she did so with the intention of working their problems out and staying together.

At the point he decided not to continue the marriage, he had already found someone else, whom he is married to now, and she does little things to harass us.

It is also important to note that he was not a Christian.

ProjectPeter
Jun 19th 2008, 01:31 PM
She separated after he bashed her over the head with a chair, but tried for 3-4 months to seek marriage counseling. He was also court-ordered to attend some individual counseling, which he did not do, and after 2 or 3 sessions of marriage counseling, he quit that too. In the end, he filed for divorce and paid for it, but she separated from him, but she did so with the intention of working their problems out and staying together.

At the point he decided not to continue the marriage, he had already found someone else, whom he is married to now, and she does little things to harass us.

It is also important to note that he was not a Christian.
Sounds perfectly legit to me... press on. Forget the past. :)

9Marksfan
Jun 19th 2008, 01:50 PM
She separated after he bashed her over the head with a chair, but tried for 3-4 months to seek marriage counseling. He was also court-ordered to attend some individual counseling, which he did not do, and after 2 or 3 sessions of marriage counseling, he quit that too. In the end, he filed for divorce and paid for it, but she separated from him, but she did so with the intention of working their problems out and staying together.

At the point he decided not to continue the marriage, he had already found someone else, whom he is married to now, and she does little things to harass us.

It is also important to note that he was not a Christian.

Thanks for clarifying that. I really don't think she's been at fault in any way (other perhaps than to have married him in the first place, if she was a believer at the time (2 Cor 6:14, Amos 3:3) - but I accept that she may not have been).

I think 1 Cor 7 makes it clear that, in such circumstances, a believing wife should "let" the unbelieving partner go - there is no shame or guilt that she should feel. She is "NOT bound". Had she been the one who was divorcing him, it would have been a different matter - but as it stands, I don't think she was wrong to have separated for her own safety and with the motive of reconciling. And if he chose to commit adultery and then divorce her, then so be it.......

What precisely do you think she feels guilty about? How does she feel about being engaged to you?

Clavicula_Nox
Jun 19th 2008, 01:59 PM
She is excited about the prospect of starting a new life with me, our date is set for 4 October. I'm not entirely sure what is holding her back, though. I can say she is hyper-emotional, and her ex does everything he can to contact her, her ex's wife does little things to harass us. I know it is hard for her to put certain things behind her because it's constantly being thrust at her, but it has been 2 years since they separated and almost a year since they were divorced.

She is a believer, and has always been a believer, but has never known what to do. Her father and family is Roman Catholic, but he never took them to church. I know that she believes, and that she wants to go with me, but I'm bad and work on Sundays...plus..finding a good church in this town will be very hard. Because she has minimal institutional exposure, she doesn't recognize differences between denominations and it would be dishonest to call her a Catholic.

I believe that she feels guilty for the marriage ending. As I said before, she does not trivialize marriage in the slightest, and divorce is anathema to her. I know that she wants to know what the Bible says on spousal abuse, and the best I could come up with was:


"And what union can there be between God's temple and idols? For you are God's temple, the home of the living God, and God has said of you, "I will live in them and walk among them, and I will be their God and they shall be my people." " ( 2 Cor. 6:16,


"Leave them; separate yourselves from them; don't touch their filthy things, and I will welcome you." ( v. 17) "Know ye not that ye are the temple of God, and that the Spirit of God dwelleth in you? If any man defile the temple [body] of God, him shall God destroy; for the temple of God is holy, which temple ye are." (1Corinthians 3:16-17,


She said that wasn't enough because it doesn't specifically say "This applies to spousal abuse."..or something like that. I'm really not sure what her objections were, she wasn't very clear on that.

9Marksfan
Jun 19th 2008, 02:07 PM
She is excited about the prospect of starting a new life with me, our date is set for 4 October. I'm not entirely sure what is holding her back, though. I can say she is hyper-emotional, and her ex does everything he can to contact her, her ex's wife does little things to harass us. I know it is hard for her to put certain things behind her because it's constantly being thrust at her, but it has been 2 years since they separated and almost a year since they were divorced.

She is a believer, and has always been a believer, but has never known what to do. Her father and family is Roman Catholic, but he never took them to church. I know that she believes, and that she wants to go with me, but I'm bad and work on Sundays...plus..finding a good church in this town will be very hard. Because she has minimal institutional exposure, she doesn't recognize differences between denominations and it would be dishonest to call her a Catholic.

I believe that she feels guilty for the marriage ending. As I said before, she does not trivialize marriage in the slightest, and divorce is anathema to her. I know that she wants to know what the Bible says on spousal abuse, and the best I could come up with was:






She said that wasn't enough because it doesn't specifically say "This applies to spousal abuse."..or something like that. I'm really not sure what her objections were, she wasn't very clear on that.

I'm wondering if, deep down, she feels guilty about being remarried? How do you feel about that? Do you think that Scripture sanctions it? Remember Jesus' words. And 1 Cor 7:11 would seem to sanction her separation, but not her remarriage.

Clavicula_Nox
Jun 19th 2008, 02:17 PM
I'm not sure, I have seen several things that make me think it isn't the right thing to do. I wonder, though, why she should be expected to live the rest of her life alone when she didn't do anything wrong.

ProjectPeter
Jun 19th 2008, 02:18 PM
If her background is Catholic... then it would stand to reason that it was the divorce itself. That's pretty near an unpardonable in the Catholic church... especially if they were married in the Catholic church or by a Catholic priest.

ProjectPeter
Jun 19th 2008, 02:23 PM
I'm wondering if, deep down, she feels guilty about being remarried? How do you feel about that? Do you think that Scripture sanctions it? Remember Jesus' words. And 1 Cor 7:11 would seem to sanction her separation, but not her remarriage.
Think on this Nigel...

1 Corinthians 7:15 *Yet if the unbelieving one leaves, let him leave; the brother or the sister is not under bondage in such cases, but God has called us to peace.

If she can't remarry after he husband walked away (an unbeliever)... then how is she now free and no longer bound to it? Sounds like she's forever bound if we take it to "never marry again because of that marriage."

Brother Mark
Jun 19th 2008, 02:29 PM
I'm not sure, I have seen several things that make me think it isn't the right thing to do. I wonder, though, why she should be expected to live the rest of her life alone when she didn't do anything wrong.

Sometimes, convincing someone they didn't do anything wrong is more difficult than getting them to accept forgiveness. I would ask her a bunch of questions about her feelings to see if you guys can get to the root of it. Where is her guilt coming from? Once you find that belief or thought that is bringing about guilt, you can deal with it. But in order to deal with it, she will need to bring those thoughts unto submission to Christ through the renewing of her mind.

Anyway, I think she probably needs to forgive herself even though I see nothing wrong with her actions. The guy left. He married another woman. She is no longer bound and is free to marry.

Steve509
Jun 19th 2008, 04:51 PM
She separated after he bashed her over the head with a chair, but tried for 3-4 months to seek marriage counseling. He was also court-ordered to attend some individual counseling, which he did not do, and after 2 or 3 sessions of marriage counseling, he quit that too. In the end, he filed for divorce and paid for it, but she separated from him, but she did so with the intention of working their problems out and staying together.

At the point he decided not to continue the marriage, he had already found someone else, whom he is married to now, and she does little things to harass us.

It is also important to note that he was not a Christian.

she separated at least in part for her own personal safety.(separation is not divorce)
he filed for divorce.
he was having sex outside the marriage.
he was not a Christian.

i cannot see how she would be bound to that marriage.

even if she did something do cause the divorce, we have a very forgiving God. all you have to do is ask.

i can understand some regret over having even married someone like that. and it's true that some people have a sense of failure over a divorce. but guilt over a divorce is an entirely different issue.

hopefully, she will seek counseling with a qualified Christian professional in that area. IMO, it is important she does not bring the guilt of a past divorce into a new marriage.

cnw
Jun 19th 2008, 07:12 PM
I think these guys are right. You need some serious communication skills and get to the bottom of why. I guess that is where I was coming from in my last post because I read into your post is that she doesn't think remarriage is ok. I think in this circumstance it would seem like it is, but there is no deffinite verse saying it is. God is a forgiving God, but there are consequences to our actions-even if our actions were right. It seems she did everything to the Greek letter, even leaving was ok according to Scripture, the Bible does not say she is not bound and now she can remarry it does say due to all the circumstances she is not tied to him as a wife.
there is a book called from forgiven to forgiveness. I would encourage you to get that book for her. there may be other issues too and this book would be a blessing.

Clavicula_Nox
Jun 19th 2008, 07:22 PM
It's hard for her to read, she has permanent damage from her abuse. Getting books is hit or miss unless there is a version that comes with large print.

Steve509
Jun 19th 2008, 10:35 PM
It's hard for her to read, she has permanent damage from her abuse. Getting books is hit or miss unless there is a version that comes with large print.

why isn't this guy in jail?

ServantofTruth
Jun 19th 2008, 10:38 PM
From someone who has VERY foolishly argued the letter of biblical law on divorce too many times - please ask her to consider the foundation of ALL Jesus' teachings and the whole law/ scripture - the bible.


LOVE

While i still believe we must study closely scriptures especially concerning our own actions - we MUST not ignore the whole picture. Forgiveness. Love of believers, and our neighbour.

God loves Her. You love her. I hope every person reading this topic, who are believers and followers of our Lord Jesus Christ, love this woman.

I'm not saying whether biblically this is right or wrong - divorce or remarriage - just that niether God or any Christian is waiting/ should be waiting for you or her to slip up. Rather we listen to your pain and pray for this situation in support of you both.

May our Lord's Will be revealed to you both soon, love Servant of Truth (brother to both of you).

9Marksfan
Jun 19th 2008, 10:49 PM
I'm not sure, I have seen several things that make me think it isn't the right thing to do. I wonder, though, why she should be expected to live the rest of her life alone when she didn't do anything wrong.

I know that is the most common objection and it seems so very hard - but that is the risk all of us who marry take - it may not work out, through no fault of ours - but God is able to give us the grace and strenght to remain single and celibate - and find our true joy in Him!

9Marksfan
Jun 19th 2008, 11:07 PM
Think on this Nigel...

1 Corinthians 7:15 *Yet if the unbelieving one leaves, let him leave; the brother or the sister is not under bondage in such cases, but God has called us to peace.

If she can't remarry after he husband walked away (an unbeliever)... then how is she now free and no longer bound to it? Sounds like she's forever bound if we take it to "never marry again because of that marriage."

I believe it means she's not bound to fight for the marriage to stay intact - ie if her husband has left, she's not bound to go after him, which would quite probably make things worse - for "God has called us to peace".

If what you say were correct, it would contradict at least two verses in 1 Cor 7 (vv 11 and 39) and also Rom 7:2.

Brother Mark
Jun 19th 2008, 11:28 PM
I believe it means she's not bound to fight for the marriage to stay intact - ie if her husband has left, she's not bound to go after him, which would quite probably make things worse - for "God has called us to peace".

If what you say were correct, it would contradict at least two verses in 1 Cor 7 (vv 11 and 39) and also Rom 7:2.

1 Cor 7 doesn't have a verse 39. Vs 11 doesn't address divorce and remarriage. Romans 7:2 certainly applies as it is speaking of the law and marriage. But that same law that Paul refers to in Romans 7, also allowed divorce. In this case, I agree with PP, that when an unbeliever leaves a believing spouse, he/she is no longer bound to the marriage. This is especially true in the case of the unbelieving spouse remarrying.

When a spouse divorced and married another, there was no chance for reconciliation under the law. The original marriage was never to be re-instated.

Deut 24:1-4

24 "When a man takes a wife and marries her, and it happens that she finds no favor in his eyes because he has found some indecency in her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce and puts it in her hand and sends her out from his house, 2 and she leaves his house and goes and becomes another man's wife, 3 and if the latter husband turns against her and writes her a certificate of divorce and puts it in her hand and sends her out of his house, or if the latter husband dies who took her to be his wife, 4 then her former husband who sent her away is not allowed to take her again to be his wife, since she has been defiled; for that is an abomination before the Lord, and you shall not bring sin on the land which the Lord your God gives you as an inheritance.
NASB

If God would not allow the former marriage to be restored, then I think he no longer saw it as a marriage.

9Marksfan
Jun 19th 2008, 11:53 PM
1 Cor 7 doesn't have a verse 39.

It does in my Bible!

A wife is bound by law as long as her husband lives; but if her husband dies, she is at liberty to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord. 1 Cor 7:39 NKJV


Vs 11 doesn't address divorce and remarriage.

It does by inference - she is to remain unmarried - ie if there is a divorce - and she is not to remarry.


Romans 7:2 certainly applies as it is speaking of the law and marriage. But that same law that Paul refers to in Romans 7, also allowed divorce.

If you are meaning Deut 24, if you look at it very carefully, it is simply stating that, IF there is a divorce, there should be a certificate - it isn't mandating divorce at all.


In this case, I agree with PP, that when an unbeliever leaves a believing spouse, he/she is no longer bound to the marriage. This is especially true in the case of the unbelieving spouse remarrying.

When a spouse divorced and married another, there was no chance for reconciliation under the law. The original marriage was never to be re-instated.

Deut 24:1-4

24 "When a man takes a wife and marries her, and it happens that she finds no favor in his eyes because he has found some indecency in her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce and puts it in her hand and sends her out from his house, 2 and she leaves his house and goes and becomes another man's wife, 3 and if the latter husband turns against her and writes her a certificate of divorce and puts it in her hand and sends her out of his house, or if the latter husband dies who took her to be his wife, 4 then her former husband who sent her away is not allowed to take her again to be his wife, since she has been defiled; for that is an abomination before the Lord, and you shall not bring sin on the land which the Lord your God gives you as an inheritance.
NASB

If God would not allow the former marriage to be restored, then I think he no longer saw it as a marriage.

No - because adultery would have been committed with the second marriage - "she has been defiled" - she would be causing further defiling by being reunited to her first husband.

ProjectPeter
Jun 19th 2008, 11:57 PM
No... that is if the wife leaves the husband.

1 Corinthians 7:10 *But to the married I give instructions, not I, but the Lord, that the wife should not leave her husband
11 *(but if she does leave, let her remain unmarried, or else be reconciled to her husband), and that the husband should not send his wife away.


That would be if they initiated the move and left.

Verse 39 is now just generally speaking of man and woman marrying. They are bound as long as the other lives. But then as Paul said earlier (by the Holy Ghost... he said that because it was HIM speaking after quoting what Jesus said)... if the unbelieving husband leaves then she ain't bound any longer. I mean dude... you are describing her as still being bound. ;)

And Mark... yep it does! :lol:

1 Corinthians 7:36 *¶But if any man thinks that he is acting unbecomingly toward his virgin daughter, if she should be of full age, and if it must be so, let him do what he wishes, he does not sin; let her marry.
37 *But he who stands firm in his heart, being under no constraint, but has authority over his own will, and has decided this in his own heart, to keep his own virgin daughter, he will do well.
38 *So then both he who gives his own virgin daughter in marriage does well, and he who does not give her in marriage will do better.
39 *¶A wife is bound as long as her husband lives; but if her husband is dead, she is free to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord.
40 *But in my opinion she is happier if she remains as she is; and I think that I also have the Spirit of God.

Brother Mark
Jun 20th 2008, 12:12 AM
It does in my Bible!

A wife is bound by law as long as her husband lives; but if her husband dies, she is at liberty to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord. 1 Cor 7:39 NKJV

Oops. Sorry. I was looking at 1 Cor. 11. Does that count?

1 Cor 7:11
11 (but if she does leave, let her remain unmarried, or else be reconciled to her husband), and that the husband should not send his wife away.
NASB

If the believing spouse leaves, she should remain unmarried. I agree with that.


It does by inference - she is to remain unmarried - ie if there is a divorce - and she is not to remarry.

Under the law, she could remarry.


If you are meaning Deut 24, if you look at it very carefully, it is simply stating that, IF there is a divorce, there should be a certificate - it isn't mandating divorce at all.

No - because adultery would have been committed with the second marriage - "she has been defiled" - she would be causing further defiling by being reunited to her first husband.

Then she must not really be married to the first husband then. Because to be separated for an extended period is sin. We know this from 1 Cor 7. If the first marriage is the only marriage that matters, and the second marriage is adultery, then certainly, the first husband can take her back and the marriage can be reconciled. However, I don't think God sees the first marriage as still a marriage. That's why they are prevented from going back together. Not only are they no longer married, but it is not good for them to remarry.

Let us also not ignore the verse that says it's better to marry than to burn. If the unbelieving spouse leaves, then one is not bound by law for the covenant is broken.

Brother Mark
Jun 20th 2008, 12:14 AM
And Mark... yep it does! :lol:

1 Corinthians 7:36 *¶But if any man thinks that he is acting unbecomingly toward his virgin daughter, if she should be of full age, and if it must be so, let him do what he wishes, he does not sin; let her marry.
37 *But he who stands firm in his heart, being under no constraint, but has authority over his own will, and has decided this in his own heart, to keep his own virgin daughter, he will do well.
38 *So then both he who gives his own virgin daughter in marriage does well, and he who does not give her in marriage will do better.
39 *¶A wife is bound as long as her husband lives; but if her husband is dead, she is free to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord.
40 *But in my opinion she is happier if she remains as she is; and I think that I also have the Spirit of God.


Yea, went to the wrong chapter. :rolleyes: Happens occasionally. But I think you are right. If she is no longer bound, she is no longer bound. When someone leaves you, then marries another, even in the OT the original marriage was not to be restored. They are free to remarry.

cnw
Jun 20th 2008, 07:20 PM
somehow I missed 39. I forgot it was in chapter 7. It makes it very difficult.

9Marksfan
Jun 22nd 2008, 03:49 PM
somehow I missed 39. I forgot it was in chapter 7. It makes it very difficult.

But God's grace is sufficient! :)

Hanif Nasir
May 29th 2013, 11:54 AM
Always think from all aspects when you are going to marry
and specially when you are going to divorce.

Matt25 Brother
May 29th 2013, 12:49 PM
There is not an example of divorce that I know of, except the woman at the well and she had 5 husbands and lived with one and Jesus told her to stop living in sin. he never expounded.He didn't need to. He forgave her of her sins. End of story. Not hard to grasp at all. It nullifies the bondage you espouse in the rest of your post.


i do think if he was having sex outside the marriage, she might have a "loop hole."The "loophole" is a repentant heart. Again, end of story. There is no bondage on the repentant.


If her background is Catholic... then it would stand to reason that it was the divorce itself. That's pretty near an unpardonable in the Catholic church... especially if they were married in the Catholic church or by a Catholic priest.The Catholic church has "dispensations" if the divorcee follows church formula for being restored. Jesus says it is much simpler than that: Ask forgiveness. It will be granted.


A wife is bound by law as long as her husband lives; but if her husband dies, she is at liberty to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord. 1 Cor 7:39 NKJVAre we under the Law?

keck553
May 29th 2013, 01:04 PM
Wow, talk about resurrection.......this thread.

Matt25 Brother
May 29th 2013, 01:09 PM
Wow, talk about resurrection.......this thread.Hmm ... didn't notice that before posting. Oh, well ... :rofl:

keck553
May 29th 2013, 01:12 PM
Hmm ... didn't notice that before posting. Oh, well ... :rofl:

Anyway, its a challenging topic for sure. I have some thoughts, maybe if others respond, I'll throw them out....