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Reedan
Jun 18th 2009, 03:03 AM
What is Premarital Kissing?
The type of kiss that I'm speaking on behalf is the type of kiss you would not do with your siblings, parents, or friends,
It is the type of kiss which is unique to the husband & the wife.

Why do we involve in those activities and for what purpose?

1. We imitate others, The reason we take part in those activities is probaly because we
see others do it, Many, if not the majority perform such activities and claim its because of love, So when we enter a relationship
we follow those examples that if we love them we can show it by kissing.

2. We are carried away by our lust, Sometimes, the reason we kiss, is simply because of lust, or sexual desire.

3. We claim to do it because of love, Sometimes we claim that we kiss because we love each other, But if we were using
that to show a satifastory reason for our actions then couldn't people say they perform oral sex because they love each other?
We just have to realize that these activities belong to those who are married. If its because of love then why don't we kiss our brother the same way?
why don't we kiss our friends the same way? Sexual activities only belong to the married, Does that Include our boyfriend/girlfriend?

Precautions & Consequences

A few consequences from premarital kissing includes
1. Feeling of Remorse, Regrets, Lack of self respect, etc.
2. Viruses such as herpes can be spread through kissing

And a few precautions are to avoid kissing from leading to sex, or other sexual activities.

Intimacy & Being Pure, And appropriate ''Kisses''
Ok, so this is the last part. I hope you all enjoyed it and thanks for taking your time reading this.
Ok, Intimacy and purity,
We want our spouse to be pure, We would not find the idea of our spouse having many sexual partners pleasant.
Would we find it pleasant if our spouse tongue kissed 40 man/women? So we should try to do our best to
remain pure for our spouse, just like we would like them to be pure for us.
And also we need to remember to every believer whom we are not married to is our brothers and sisters in christ.


So the question that remains, What kind of kisses are appropriate to a boyfriend/girlfriend?
The kiss thats appropriate is the way you would kiss your brother/sister/parents or friends, Which i'm sure, Is simply a
nice kiss on the cheeks.

Thanks God for giving me the this great knowledge and the ability to write this, And thanks to everyone who read this, Tell me what you think about it.

teddyv
Jun 18th 2009, 03:30 AM
So the question that remains, What kind of kisses are appropriate to a boyfriend/girlfriend?

It depends on the couple.

Reedan
Jun 18th 2009, 03:38 AM
It depends on the couple.

So what is your view on french kissing?

teddyv
Jun 18th 2009, 04:32 AM
So what is your view on french kissing?
What do you mean? For myself and my wife, before we were married we were OK with that. It did not lead us into sexual impurity (at least as we both understand it). That does not mean our experience is applicable to every other couple.

Reedan
Jun 18th 2009, 04:42 AM
What do you mean? For myself and my wife, before we were married we were OK with that. It did not lead us into sexual impurity (at least as we both understand it). That does not mean our experience is applicable to every other couple.

So can i ask you this, While married if you love someone can you french kiss them as long as it does not lead into ''sexual impurity''?

DeadToSelf
Jun 18th 2009, 06:45 AM
Reedan

What you're asking teddyv is, if he likes someone else, though he is married, would it be ok to french kiss someone?

Is that what you're asking?

You also have to take into account the different types of love.

Agape - Which would be someone's love for his/her spouse or also being used in saying, "I love pudding". A charity type of love

Then you have,

Eros (Which I think is what you're getting at) - It is more of a passionate love like one would have for the opposite sex. Though it doesn't have to be sexual in nature there is that desire for that other person, again not necessarily sexual.

Philia - Which we would call a friendship type of love.

Storge - A man's/woman's love for their offspring.


And again it would come down to each couple. For me if I started kissing with my girlfriend, I don't have one, but if I did, I know that I would be led into some sinful stuff.

Plus I wouldn't commit to any of those types of actions because I know that the Spirit of GOD would convict me if I did that.

However, I do have friends that have girlfriends, I don't know if they kiss, and don't seem to be moved in their faith or be convicted so it is to each person's conviction.

The french kissing part. I don't think I'd go and french kiss my brother because I love him. Since the type of affection I have for him is not the same type that I would have for a girlfriend.

And on the other hand I wouldn't probably sacrifice all that I am for a girlfriend but I would sacrifice all that I am for the sake of my brother.

Reedan
Jun 18th 2009, 02:28 PM
Reedan

What you're asking teddyv is, if he likes someone else, though he is married, would it be ok to french kiss someone?

Is that what you're asking?

You also have to take into account the different types of love.

Agape - Which would be someone's love for his/her spouse or also being used in saying, "I love pudding". A charity type of love

Then you have,

Eros (Which I think is what you're getting at) - It is more of a passionate love like one would have for the opposite sex. Though it doesn't have to be sexual in nature there is that desire for that other person, again not necessarily sexual.

Philia - Which we would call a friendship type of love.

Storge - A man's/woman's love for their offspring.


And again it would come down to each couple. For me if I started kissing with my girlfriend, I don't have one, but if I did, I know that I would be led into some sinful stuff.

Plus I wouldn't commit to any of those types of actions because I know that the Spirit of GOD would convict me if I did that.

However, I do have friends that have girlfriends, I don't know if they kiss, and don't seem to be moved in their faith or be convicted so it is to each person's conviction.

The french kissing part. I don't think I'd go and french kiss my brother because I love him. Since the type of affection I have for him is not the same type that I would have for a girlfriend.

And on the other hand I wouldn't probably sacrifice all that I am for a girlfriend but I would sacrifice all that I am for the sake of my brother.

Thanks for answering my question, So wait, These types of physical activity are only for the married? right? Are they allowed for boyfriend/girlfriend as well, then how far can it go? beyond the french kiss?

teddyv
Jun 18th 2009, 02:45 PM
So can i ask you this, While married if you love someone can you french kiss them as long as it does not lead into ''sexual impurity''?
What? Of course not! I don't know how you jumped to that from what I stated.

Firefighter
Jun 18th 2009, 02:52 PM
Your framing of the question goes against logic to come to an outcome that you desire.

I.E. - If you would not french kiss someone else while you are married, THEN, french kissing is only for married people.

The logical fallacy can be seen here... I would not go on a date with someone while I am married, therefore I can safely assume that dating is only for married people?:o

See the problem?

We share things (like kissing) with those we have some sort of commitment to, and because of that commitment, we do not share those things with other people because it would violate that commitment whether it be dating, engaged, or married.

DeadToSelf
Jun 18th 2009, 05:51 PM
Thanks for answering my question, So wait, These types of physical activity are only for the married? right? Are they allowed for boyfriend/girlfriend as well, then how far can it go? beyond the french kiss?

Well then this question ties into is dating ok or courting?

Since dating is more of the secular term with "extra" things while courting is more of just getting to know someone and having that interest in that person, not giving into any fleshly actions.

So the french kissing question is....."What does it please your flesh or spirit? Or what does it edify?"

See I don't have to kiss my mom and dad goodnight for them to know that I love them because my love for them is different. Since it is an agape type of love. But for my girlfriend if I kissed her it would,hopefully, be out of an affectionate type of love.

But the question still stand, "What does it please your flesh or spirit? Or what does it edify?"

Hope this helps. :)

Firefighter
Jun 18th 2009, 06:34 PM
The Baconator from Wendy's pleases my flesh, that does not mean it is wrong...:D

DeadToSelf
Jun 18th 2009, 06:48 PM
No because you're taking what I'm saying and changing it.

I'm talking about pleasing flesh as in through sexual desires. That is what we were talking about we weren't talk about eating.

Plus it is necessary for the body to eat. How then would you live?:D:lol:

Firefighter
Jun 18th 2009, 06:58 PM
Pleasing to the flesh, does not automatically make something wrong. That was my only point.

A decent argument could be made that it is needed for a man to have a woman. God did say that it was not good for man to be alone...;)

DeadToSelf
Jun 18th 2009, 07:48 PM
No I understood your point.:D

I also know that it's not good for man to be alone.

Thank GOD for women!!! I will say that.:lol::lol:

But what I am getting at is, is me french kissing my girlfriend edifying my spirit in any way? Not at all, but only my flesh.

There are times where we please our flesh but not in a sinful way. Sitting down and polishing a cheeseburger is fleshly, I mean it helps us stay alive, but there is no sin in it.

Or also a man with his wife having sex would be fleshly but since they are married they are permitted to do so, but not to completely neglect GOD by constantly seeking to please their flesh.

But as I stated earlier that it varies from couple to couple. For me I want to abstain from kissing any girlfriends that come my way until the correct time being. But for someone else they could kiss someone and be ok with it. But that is why I ask the question, "What is being edified?"

Reedan
Jun 19th 2009, 01:39 AM
Your framing of the question goes against logic to come to an outcome that you desire.

I.E. - If you would not french kiss someone else while you are married, THEN, french kissing is only for married people.

The logical fallacy can be seen here... I would not go on a date with someone while I am married, therefore I can safely assume that dating is only for married people?:o

See the problem?

We share things (like kissing) with those we have some sort of commitment to, and because of that commitment, we do not share those things with other people because it would violate that commitment whether it be dating, engaged, or married.

What do you mean by date? If your married and have a friend that wants to go to the zoo or something, and you go with them, theres nothing wrong with that, then the dating example doesn't fit with the french kiss

Firefighter
Jun 19th 2009, 02:46 AM
How old are you?!?!

A trip to the zoo is hardly a date, unless I am on a play date with my 18 month old son.

Dates usually involve flowers, resturaunts, maybe even a movie, BUT for the sake of argument let's abandon that.

I would not send roses to another woman because I am married, so sending roses is obviously only for married people.

Now do you see the problem?

Reedan
Jun 19th 2009, 03:09 AM
How old are you?!?!

A trip to the zoo is hardly a date, unless I am on a play date with my 18 month old son.

Dates usually involve flowers, resturaunts, maybe even a movie, BUT for the sake of argument let's abandon that.

I would not send roses to another woman because I am married, so sending roses is obviously only for married people.

Now do you see the problem?

I see what you are trying to say but it does not fit, If you want let me ask you a question, Is it ok to be french kissing with multiple people? or are there expections for girlfriend/boyfriends?

teddyv
Jun 19th 2009, 03:19 AM
I see what you are trying to say but it does not fit, If you want let me ask you a question, Is it ok to be french kissing with multiple people? or are there expections for girlfriend/boyfriends?
I just reread your OP because I don't really know where you are going. In your context of boyfriend/girlfriends are your referring to the typical connotation - a couple "going out", or are referring to a female friends of a male who is married (or vice versa)?

DeadToSelf
Jun 19th 2009, 05:52 AM
I see what you are trying to say but it does not fit, If you want let me ask you a question, Is it ok to be french kissing with multiple people? or are there expections for girlfriend/boyfriends?

I already answered your question with the different types of love. I wouldn't french kiss my sister nor my mother. But I would french kiss my wife also would be able to french kiss my girlfriend but I, personally, wouldn't do that.

Different types of love bring about different types of actions.

Scubadude
Jun 19th 2009, 12:15 PM
We share things (like kissing) with those we have some sort of commitment to, and because of that commitment, we do not share those things with other people because it would violate that commitment whether it be dating, engaged, or married.

I think you answer the question very well.

People are sexual, and kissing expresses a commitment in a very pleasuable way. This present world teaches us we can have the pleasure without the commitment. In a perfect world (where lust and controle don't motivate), you would probably want to marry the one you are kissing.

Reedan
Jun 19th 2009, 06:02 PM
I already answered your question with the different types of love. I wouldn't french kiss my sister nor my mother. But I would french kiss my wife also would be able to french kiss my girlfriend but I, personally, wouldn't do that.

Different types of love bring about different types of actions.

So can you explain? you can french kiss this person if its your girlfriend, for example you broke up with her, find another girlfriend, french kiss her, Its ok?

RabbiKnife
Jun 19th 2009, 06:42 PM
So can you explain? you can french kiss this person if its your girlfriend, for example you broke up with her, find another girlfriend, french kiss her, Its ok?

I don't have a problem with that. Plus, since I got married 23 years ago, I haven't had any girlfriends. My wife frowns on that...

;)

DeadToSelf
Jun 19th 2009, 06:44 PM
So can you explain? you can french kiss this person if its your girlfriend, for example you broke up with her, find another girlfriend, french kiss her, Its ok?

I'll used what urban missionary said,
"We share things (like kissing) with those we have some sort of commitment to, and because of that commitment, we do not share those things with other people because it would violate that commitment whether it be dating, engaged, or married."

You're also forgetting what I've said before, I said I would want to abstain from french kissing a girl since it wouldn't edify me spiritually. But I do have friends that kiss their girlfriends and don't seem to have a problem with it.

So for me no but for someone else it could be perfectly normal. Of course our actions are between us and GOD.

I personally don't think we should be french kissing or kissing in any way to give us sexual gratitude. That is my view.

But as I've said before some people can kiss and not be tempted in any way. I would kiss someone and be really tempted to want to do something else.

threebigrocks
Jun 19th 2009, 06:56 PM
Honestly, I am very confused by this thread. :rolleyes:

If someone is not married, a person need to know where their self control threshold is. Simple as that. If a simple kiss like you would give your mom is too much - don't. If a hug is too much - don't.

There is also an issue of what is too intimate. A passionate kiss however you see that - probably too intimate. There is a level of intimacy that was only meant to be shared between a husband and a wife. That's the way it is. Just as there is a level of intimacy in faith with God that we can't share with anyone else, same goes for our relationships. Again, it's self control in how we share that intimacy.

Courting and dating? With some - courting carries more of a respectful definition of action. Whatever floats your boat, no real difference by definition.

There is nothing wrong with premarital kissing. Just be sure you aren't giving away what shouldn't be.

Reedan
Jun 19th 2009, 07:55 PM
I'll used what urban missionary said,
"We share things (like kissing) with those we have some sort of commitment to, and because of that commitment, we do not share those things with other people because it would violate that commitment whether it be dating, engaged, or married."

You're also forgetting what I've said before, I said I would want to abstain from french kissing a girl since it wouldn't edify me spiritually. But I do have friends that kiss their girlfriends and don't seem to have a problem with it.

So for me no but for someone else it could be perfectly normal. Of course our actions are between us and GOD.

I personally don't think we should be french kissing or kissing in any way to give us sexual gratitude. That is my view.

But as I've said before some people can kiss and not be tempted in any way. I would kiss someone and be really tempted to want to do something else.

Then, maybe someone else can say oral sex is a way of showing commitment to another, and this person could also say its between them and God.

The bible tells us not to even have a hint of sexual immorality, French kissing for a half an hour? a way of showing commitment?

You see, some people don't know what they are doing is wrong, There are places that claimed that masturbation is ok, anal sex before marriage is ok, and that oral sex is also ok, And say sex before marriage is wrong. Some people do not know, some just don't want to let go of certain things.

threebigrocks
Jun 19th 2009, 07:59 PM
Then, maybe someone else can say oral sex is a way of showing commitment to another, and this person could also say its between them and God.

The bible tells us not to even have a hint of sexual immorality, French kissing for a half an hour? a way of showing commitment?

You see, some people don't know what they are doing is wrong, There are places that claimed that masturbation is ok, anal sex before marriage is ok, and that oral sex is also ok, And say sex before marriage is wrong. Some people do not know, some just don't want to let go of certain things.

And those are the sorts things that cross that line of intimacy that wasn't meant to be had out of marriage. And in some cases - not at all.

Reedan
Jun 19th 2009, 08:01 PM
And those are the sorts things that cross that line of intimacy that wasn't meant to be had out of marriage. And in some cases - not at all.

So what about french kissing? It does not cross the line of intimacy? and what do you mean by some cases- not at all?

threebigrocks
Jun 19th 2009, 08:16 PM
So what about french kissing? It does not cross the line of intimacy? and what do you mean by some cases- not at all?

Too intimate, IMHO. Think about it, it's all the desire of the flesh, heavily. It's more than innocent kissing. So what happens when that "more" isn't enough? Where's the line? Self control starts with knowing what sort of path this stuff leads to.

Anal sex - I've come to the conviction that it's no different than with what isn't natural with the same sex. Other may not hold that conviction, but really - what's natural about it?

Why the obsession with kissing with tongue? I'm not getting it. To me it sounds like trying to justify something in despite of conviction. ;)

And yes, I'm approaching this as though we are talking of people who are not married.

Reedan
Jun 19th 2009, 08:37 PM
Too intimate, IMHO. Think about it, it's all the desire of the flesh, heavily. It's more than innocent kissing. So what happens when that "more" isn't enough? Where's the line? Self control starts with knowing what sort of path this stuff leads to.

Anal sex - I've come to the conviction that it's no different than with what isn't natural with the same sex. Other may not hold that conviction, but really - what's natural about it?

Why the obsession with kissing with tongue? I'm not getting it. To me it sounds like trying to justify something in despite of conviction. ;)

And yes, I'm approaching this as though we are talking of people who are not married.

Oh ok, so you agree that we should avoid french kissing before marriage?:) Thats what i was trying to see what you guys think about this

And what about the Anal sex, part, not natural?, what about in marriage, what you think?

threebigrocks
Jun 19th 2009, 09:05 PM
And what about the Anal sex, part, not natural?, what about in marriage, what you think?

At what point does it become natural? ;)

Reedan
Jun 19th 2009, 09:06 PM
At what point does it become natural? ;)

I'm not good in figuring out parables lol, can you break it down?

Twin2
Jun 19th 2009, 09:09 PM
Okay, I was going to say this has been entertaining, but I don't think it really has been. I guess thought provoking might fit.

As a young Christian, I didn't see any harm in kissing between a boyfriend and a girlfriend. I felt that as long as the couple knew when to stop, there wasn't any harm. I went on private dates with my boyfriend. We would go into secret places to be alone... and we would kiss. Okay enough.

As a 41 year old woman, Christian woman, mother of four, I have a different take on this. I encouraged my daughter to date with other couples, not to go into secret places. I have seen the beauty of innocense in other young christian women whose parents demanded purity. I have seen the beauty of innocense in young christian woman who expected to be treated as a vessel of honor and refused to be defiled. I have seen the honor of a couple marrying, knowing there was nothing between them.

I believe passionate kissing can lead to lustful desires. I believe it can lead to trying to fulfill those desires before marriage. Sorry young'uns. I believe passionate kissing between an unmarried couple is dangerous and not nessary to test your attraction to each other. The attraction is either there or it's not and you know it without kissing. If you don't want to get burnt, don't mess with the fire!

Can I back this up with scripture? No, not now. Given time, I'm sure there must be something. Am I saying couples shouldn't kiss? No. I believe they should kiss. I still believe a couple needs to know when to stop, and the kissing needs to remain innocent. The kind of kissing my boyfriend and I did when we were younger - well I believe now it was sin. A couple getting to know each other need to spend time together with others, getting to know each other. They should be having fun. They should learn what the other is all about. How they think, how they react to life. I think that a lot of modern marriages fail today because the couple focuses too much on the passion and not enough on getting to know each other. There's plenty of time for passion after the vowels.
Signed, the old fuddy dud

Firefighter
Jun 19th 2009, 09:12 PM
A kiss may or may not be intimate. I have kissed girls before and felt absolutely nothing at all. I have also kissed girls and it made my toes tingle. It is really a person by person and sometimes a couple by couple basis. Sometimes, a kiss is just a kiss.

Since it obviously is an issue for you, to you it is a sin. But it may not be an issue to others. To try an relate kissing to oral and ahem... "other" kinds of sex is ludicrous.

Reedan
Jun 19th 2009, 09:13 PM
A kiss may or may not be intimate. I have kissed girls before and felt absolutely nothing at all. I have also kissed girls and it made my toes tingle. It is really a person by person and sometimes a couple by couple basis. Sometimes, a kiss is just a kiss.

Since it obviously is an issue for you, to you it is a sin. But it may not be an issue to others. To try an relate kissing to oral and ahem... "other" kinds of sex is ludicrous.

A kiss is just a kiss, what kind of kiss are you talking about? The kiss I'm thinking is like the french kiss type, The lip to lip, The way you wouldn't kiss one of your family members

Firefighter
Jun 19th 2009, 09:14 PM
I believe passionate kissing can lead to lustful desires.

Passionate! THAT is the word I was trying to think of, THANKS!

Firefighter
Jun 19th 2009, 09:17 PM
A kiss is just a kiss, what kind of kiss are you talking about? The kiss I'm thinking is like the french kiss type, The lip to lip, The way you wouldn't kiss one of your family members

It is completely unimportant. If a peck gets you bent out of shape and thinking lustful thoughts it is wrong. If a open mouthed tongue kiss gets you bent out of shape and thinking lustful thoughts it is wrong. If neither gets you thinking lustful thought, neither would be wrong.

It is a matter of the heart, not the mouth.

Twin2
Jun 19th 2009, 09:20 PM
As for the other types of sex... personally I don't believe it to be natural. I don't believe it to be something a Christian should be messing with, married or unmarried. I would call that sexual immorality. I would have to call any kind of intimacy past kissing is a sexual act and would say it is wrong outside of marriage.

Sometimes when you haven't yet found the answers in the word, you really have to go with your convictions and be satisfied with that. The answer is there, but until you find it, trust your convictions. God has a way of providing those instantly. It's good to ask others for help in grey areas, but again, trust your convictions.

Reedan
Jun 19th 2009, 09:20 PM
It is completely unimportant. If a peck gets you bent out of shape and thinking lustful thoughts it is wrong. If a open mouthed tongue kiss gets you bent out of shape and thinking lustful thoughts it is wrong. If neither gets you thinking lustful thought, neither would be wrong.

It is a matter of the heart, not the mouth.

Its true if the peck gets you thinking lustful thoughts is wrong
and its true if the tongue kiss gets you thinking lustful thoughts is wrong.

And what about the act itself?

Can someone kiss this girl for an hour, then kiss another one, and another one, it goes on and on, Its ok?

RabbiKnife
Jun 19th 2009, 09:23 PM
Its true if the peck gets you thinking lustful thoughts is wrong
and its true if the tongue kiss gets you thinking lustful thoughts is wrong.

And what about the act itself?

Can someone kiss this girl for an hour, then kiss another one, and another one, it goes on and on, Its ok?

If you can find three girls (minimum) that will let you kiss them an hour at a time, one after another, then you have lips of steel...

The act itself of a kiss is not sinful. Unless your conscience offends you, in which case a kiss of 1/10th of a second is sinful.

Reedan
Jun 19th 2009, 09:25 PM
If you can find three girls (minimum) that will let you kiss them an hour at a time, one after another, then you have lips of steel...

The act itself of a kiss is not sinful. Unless your conscience offends you, in which case a kiss of 1/10th of a second is sinful.

So you can french kiss anyone?

Twin2
Jun 19th 2009, 09:27 PM
Are you asking if it is okay to be a player? Regardless of where you draw the line in intimacy, there should still be a commitment to the one you are intimate with. I can't tell you biblically that it is wrong to kiss one person after another. In my heart, I just keep thinking that would be a scumbag. There must be something biblical to settle this debate.

Isn't french kissing intimate? Does that not qualify has passionate kissing? Isn't there a degree of lustful desire that goes along with french kissing?

RabbiKnife
Jun 19th 2009, 09:29 PM
I'm never going to french kiss Urban Missionary. Have you seen his picture?

Theoretically, I guess you could, although why you would I have no idea. Again, you are talking about single, non-married folks. I don't think married folks will be french kissing anyone but their respective spouses.

A kiss that is purely a mechanical exercise is pointless and is probably only intended either as a fundraiser at the kissing booth at the country fair or as an assumed requisite to sexual activity.

Reedan
Jun 19th 2009, 09:31 PM
Are you asking if it is okay to be a player? Regardless of where you draw the line in intimacy, there should still be a commitment to the one you are intimate with. I can't tell you biblically that it is wrong to kiss one person after another. In my heart, I just keep thinking that would be a scumbag. There must be something biblical to settle this debate.

Isn't french kissing intimate? Does that not qualify has passionate kissing? Isn't there a degree of lustful desire that goes along with french kissing?

I agree that things like french kissing only belongs to a married couple, I'm just sharing what i know with others, Since some people state that you can french kiss as long as you don't have lustful toughts, i asked can you french kiss anyone? for example, you can shake someone hands as long as theres no lustful toughts, you can shake anyone's hand then

Firefighter
Jun 19th 2009, 09:32 PM
It has been done...:o

I was kissed one time by a girl that had had WAY to much to drink. I was working security at a nightclub (years ago). She had passed out and I was carrying her to the outside patio to let the cold air wake her up a little. She woke up half way to the door and planted a big, wet, sloppy kiss on me. While it was a good kiss as far as form goes, I felt nothing, it meant nothing more than she simply had too much to drink. There was no lust involved at all. While she was certainly attractive, she was a lesbian. I went home and told my wife "You are NEVER gonna believe what happened to me tonight!" I even told her that it was a good kiss.

Because of the intimacy that my wife and I have shared (intimacy is SOOOOOOO much more than physical), she simply laughed and replied with "Well I am glad it was a good kiss." Before the night was over, I kissed my beautiful wife. Two similar kisses, two COMPLETELY different results.

Sometimes a kiss is just a kiss.

Twin2
Jun 19th 2009, 09:33 PM
I'm sorry, I can't french kiss anyone without lustful thoughts! and I don't want just anyone's tongue down my throat!

Okay, I just read UrbanMissionary's story and I think I could french kiss somone without lustful thoughts! Gross!

Reedan
Jun 19th 2009, 09:37 PM
It has been done...:o

I was kissed one time by a girl that had had WAY to much to drink. I was working security at a nightclub (years ago). She had passed out and I was carrying her to the outside patio to let the cold air wake her up a little. She woke up half way to the door and planted a big, wet, sloppy kiss on me. While it was a good kiss as far as form goes, I felt nothing, it meant nothing more than she simply had too much to drink. There was no lust involved at all. While she was certainly attractive, she was a lesbian. I went home and told my wife "You are NEVER gonna believe what happened to me tonight!" I even told her that it was a good kiss.

Because of the intimacy that my wife and I have shared (intimacy is SOOOOOOO much more than physical), she simply laughed and replied with "Well I am glad it was a good kiss." Before the night was over, I kissed my beautiful wife. Two similar kisses, two COMPLETELY different results.

Sometimes a kiss is just a kiss.

Urbanmissionary, How do you now when someone is attractive?

Firefighter
Jun 19th 2009, 09:38 PM
or as an assumed requisite to sexual activity.

That is about the funniest thing I have read on here all day. What a way with words...:lol:



I'm sorry, I can't french kiss anyone without lustful thoughts! and I don't want just anyone's tongue down my throat!

Who on earth are you kissing, Gene Simmons?!?!;)

Firefighter
Jun 19th 2009, 09:40 PM
Urbanmissionary, How do you now when someone is attractive?

When they are pleasing to the eye, and mind. I think the Grand Canyon is beautiful, but I can't imagine lusting after it...

I know some girls that are drop dead gorgeous, but their attitude ruins any attraction.

Reedan
Jun 19th 2009, 09:41 PM
When they are pleasing to the eye. I think the Grand Canyon is beautiful, but I can't imagine lusting after it...

I'm sorry but sometimes i think it requires a level of lust to say ''shes attractive'' and what do you all mean by ''attractive''?

threebigrocks
Jun 19th 2009, 09:42 PM
I'm not good in figuring out parables lol, can you break it down?

At which point does something which is unnatural "suddenly" become natural? It doesn't. Getting married isn't going to suddenly make something unnatural become natural, something it isn't.

Firefighter
Jun 19th 2009, 09:43 PM
refresh. I added to my post.

Attraction is so much more than physical much like intimacy, as you get older, you will understand.

Reedan
Jun 19th 2009, 09:44 PM
At which point does something which is unnatural "suddenly" become natural? It doesn't. Getting married isn't going to suddenly make something unnatural become natural, something it isn't.

Oh ok, so you think married people should only have intercourse?

no oral, anal, and nothing ''unatural''?

Twin2
Jun 19th 2009, 09:44 PM
Okay, I'm bowing out before I get into trouble. I'll be back later to see how this went.

threebigrocks
Jun 19th 2009, 09:47 PM
Sometimes a kiss is just a kiss.

True, but when two people are dating there is ALREADY multiple attractions including the physical. doubt you will find anyone who says they choose to date someone who isn't attractive to them. :rolleyes:

So if you get into a passionate kiss - it's just stoking a fire into something bigger.

Reedan
Jun 19th 2009, 09:55 PM
At which point does something which is unnatural "suddenly" become natural? It doesn't. Getting married isn't going to suddenly make something unnatural become natural, something it isn't.

So Threebigrocks, what do you think is allowed in a marriage? no oral, no anal, nothing ''unatural''?

threebigrocks
Jun 19th 2009, 10:10 PM
So Threebigrocks, what do you think is allowed in a marriage? no oral, no anal, nothing ''unatural''?

Know what, these are my convictions as I've already said. If it's unnatural - don't. It's up to a married couple to find their way through their intimacy together, by looking into scripture and being honest about a sexual relationship.

So, what does scripture say about oral sex?

Reedan, what to do you hope to gain with this thread? We started with kissing and now into sexual acts and intimacy. Nobody is going to condone sexual immorality, and if it varies from what is in scripture you aren't going to get someone to share personal information that is this personal on a message board. If they did it would get removed, pronto.

Is there a main theme here this is all circling around?

Firefighter
Jun 19th 2009, 10:15 PM
So if you get into a passionate kiss - it's just stoking a fire into something bigger.

I agree. But we cannot categorically declare something a sin that the bible does not in either principle or command.

Firefighter
Jun 19th 2009, 10:17 PM
So Threebigrocks, what do you think is allowed in a marriage? no oral, no anal, nothing ''unatural''?

I am pretty much an "anything goes" kinda guy, especially if the questions are genuine, but I do think this is wildly inappropriate for a board that may have teen members on it.

Reedan
Jun 19th 2009, 10:19 PM
Know what, these are my convictions as I've already said. If it's unnatural - don't. It's up to a married couple to find their way through their intimacy together, by looking into scripture and being honest about a sexual relationship.

So, what does scripture say about oral sex?

Reedan, what to do you hope to gain with this thread? We started with kissing and now into sexual acts and intimacy. Nobody is going to condone sexual immorality, and if it varies from what is in scripture you aren't going to get someone to share personal information that is this personal on a message board. If they did it would get removed, pronto.

Is there a main theme here this is all circling around?

The topic is premarital kissing, Then this came up and i wanted to discuss it a little, There's no need to be hiding anything, this is a christian forum, Why not talk?

Reedan
Jun 19th 2009, 10:21 PM
I am pretty much an "anything goes" kinda guy, especially if the questions are genuine, but I do think this is wildly inappropriate for a board that may have teen members on it.

''Teen members'' Should probaly be educated on this, I don't see why people act like sex is like a poison, there is nothing to hide.

Firefighter
Jun 19th 2009, 10:29 PM
''Teen members'' Should probaly be educated on this, I don't see why people act like sex is like a poison, there is nothing to hide.

Discussing various forms of sex in an open forum, especially when it is starting to get detailed, is inappropriate. It is not up to you OR me to decide when children are "educated" in matters related to sex. It is the parents decision and to violate that is wrong, no matter what either of us think.

Further, this thread will end up closed, and accomplish nothing.

I cannot speak for anyone else, but I will not engage in any further discussion of specific sexual acts.

Scubadude
Jun 19th 2009, 11:41 PM
If you can find three girls (minimum) that will let you kiss them an hour at a time, one after another, then you have lips of steel...




I'd call that true lip service. :lol:

TrustingFollower
Jun 20th 2009, 01:23 AM
This thread is being closed for mod review.