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Is it wrong? (Not gay, not cheating, etc...)

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  • Is it wrong? (Not gay, not cheating, etc...)

    My girlfriend gets mad at me cause I'm honest with her... I said (some actress) has a nice figure. Obviously she'd get upset, I'd get upset if she was looking at another guy and saying he's better looking than me... Thats human nature... But I have a goal in my mind set on looking like a body builder, right now I am only 146 lbs, but I want to get up to 190 and have the general lean look of Ryan Reynolds, I think he has a very nice build (not gay.) Now my girlfriend is obsessing with her weight and is trying to look like this actress I think has a nice athletic body. Is it wrong of me to think that her body has a nice shape? I think my favorite actor (Ryan Reynolds) has a good shape as well, that doesn't mean I want to date him, lol. I guess I'm appreciating the way their appearance is...

  • #2
    I dont see anything wrong with it.

    I think its good that your honest about it.

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    • #3
      Originally posted by Scottizzle View Post
      My girlfriend gets mad at me cause I'm honest with her... I said (some actress) has a nice figure. Obviously she'd get upset, I'd get upset if she was looking at another guy and saying he's better looking than me... Thats human nature... But I have a goal in my mind set on looking like a body builder, right now I am only 146 lbs, but I want to get up to 190 and have the general lean look of Ryan Reynolds, I think he has a very nice build (not gay.) Now my girlfriend is obsessing with her weight and is trying to look like this actress I think has a nice athletic body. Is it wrong of me to think that her body has a nice shape? I think my favorite actor (Ryan Reynolds) has a good shape as well, that doesn't mean I want to date him, lol. I guess I'm appreciating the way their appearance is...
      chok this up a bit to the differences between men and women. My wife never understood my weight-lifting obsession... for a while she even took it personally as to say things like "don't I love you enough?" and such. Things are better for us now as we communicate our needs and feelings more clearly but it used to be a major problem.

      Reassure her that you love her exactly as she is and admiring someone else's body holds no candle at all to the love and passion that you have for HER in particular.

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      • #4
        No, its not wrong to think someone else is attractive, but knowing how your girlfriend reacts, I'd think twice about telling her. Her knowing which actresses you think are attractive doesn't add much to anything, and if she's struggling with body image (as it sounds like) hearing you say those things can really bring her down.

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        • #5
          Originally posted by Scottizzle View Post
          My girlfriend gets mad at me cause I'm honest with her... I said (some actress) has a nice figure. Obviously she'd get upset, I'd get upset if she was looking at another guy and saying he's better looking than me... Thats human nature... But I have a goal in my mind set on looking like a body builder, right now I am only 146 lbs, but I want to get up to 190 and have the general lean look of Ryan Reynolds, I think he has a very nice build (not gay.) Now my girlfriend is obsessing with her weight and is trying to look like this actress I think has a nice athletic body. Is it wrong of me to think that her body has a nice shape? I think my favorite actor (Ryan Reynolds) has a good shape as well, that doesn't mean I want to date him, lol. I guess I'm appreciating the way their appearance is...
          Being honest is one thing, but it's wiser to know when to be honest and when to hold back an answer that might get you in trouble. I you don't want to lie, just hold back your tongue and don't say anything. And if you do realize you just were brutally honest and said something hurtful, try to follow it up with some kind honest comment about her.

          Not that I'm at expert at this, but when you said; "(Some actress) has a nice figure," follow It-up with, "... but too bad for her I met you first sweetheart!". That's sure to bring a smile to her face instead of a frown.

          If that's not your style I'm sure you can come-up with someting more original and more believable, but I hope you get the point.
          Give my good Reps to Him, Tell Him about my bad ones!

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          • #6
            Originally posted by DanDMan64 View Post
            Being honest is one thing, but it's wiser to know when to be honest and when to hold back an answer that might get you in trouble. I you don't want to lie, just hold back your tongue and don't say anything. And if you do realize you just were brutally honest and said something hurtful, try to follow it up with some kind honest comment about her.

            Not that I'm at expert at this, but when you said; "(Some actress) has a nice figure," follow It-up with, "... but too bad for her I met you first sweetheart!". That's sure to bring a smile to her face instead of a frown.

            If that's not your style I'm sure you can come-up with someting more original and more believable, but I hope you get the point.


            Yes awesome, thank you ahha

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            • #7
              Originally posted by Scottizzle View Post
              My girlfriend gets mad at me cause I'm honest with her... I said (some actress) has a nice figure. Obviously she'd get upset, I'd get upset if she was looking at another guy and saying he's better looking than me... Thats human nature... But I have a goal in my mind set on looking like a body builder, right now I am only 146 lbs, but I want to get up to 190 and have the general lean look of Ryan Reynolds, I think he has a very nice build (not gay.) Now my girlfriend is obsessing with her weight and is trying to look like this actress I think has a nice athletic body. Is it wrong of me to think that her body has a nice shape? I think my favorite actor (Ryan Reynolds) has a good shape as well, that doesn't mean I want to date him, lol. I guess I'm appreciating the way their appearance is...
              No its not wrong, but you have to realize that most women are extremely insecure when it comes to this kind of stuff, especially their weight!!!

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              • #8
                Originally posted by JIML View Post
                No its not wrong, but you have to realize that most women are extremely insecure when it comes to this kind of stuff, especially their weight!!!
                Yep, it keeps them on their toes!

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                • #9
                  Being honest is great! But I'm wondering...did you volunteer your opinions about this actress, or were they requested? If your girlfriend didn't ask what you thought about the actress' figure, but you just blurted it out, I can see why she'd be a little upset...inversely, if she asked you if you thought the actress was pretty, she really doesn't have any right to be upset.

                  My $0.02
                  Every blessing you pour out, I turn back to praise,
                  When the darkness closes in Lord, still I will say-
                  Blessed Be The Name!

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                  • #10
                    Scott,

                    This thread brings to mind Matthew 5:27-28

                    27"You have heard that it was said, 'YOU SHALL NOT COMMIT ADULTERY';
                    28but I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart.

                    Are your intentions pure when you look at the actress and tell your girlfriend. Her reaction may be an indication for you to examine yourself here.
                    I am a Christian man in the Devil's land, spreading the gospel man to man.
                    Have you laid your burdens down?

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by Scottizzle View Post
                      My girlfriend gets mad at me cause I'm honest with her... I said (some actress) has a nice figure. Obviously she'd get upset, I'd get upset if she was looking at another guy and saying he's better looking than me... Thats human nature... But I have a goal in my mind set on looking like a body builder, right now I am only 146 lbs, but I want to get up to 190 and have the general lean look of Ryan Reynolds, I think he has a very nice build (not gay.) Now my girlfriend is obsessing with her weight and is trying to look like this actress I think has a nice athletic body. Is it wrong of me to think that her body has a nice shape? I think my favorite actor (Ryan Reynolds) has a good shape as well, that doesn't mean I want to date him, lol. I guess I'm appreciating the way their appearance is...
                      A classic situation. Is it wrong? No its not. Your eye is going to find various body styles pleasing.

                      The trick here is that girls are self conscious. By saying what you did (while it may have been a harmless comment) may have set the standard of what is physically pleasing to you. In essence it may have left her feeling poorly about herself.

                      This kind of thing happens. Its one of those little things about girls that you learn about as you grow.

                      The thing here is to reinforce how beautiful she is to you. Find characteristics that you really enjoy about her and let her know. Maybe you find her eyes pleasing or perhaps another part of her (both physically and personality wise). This strengthens the perception that you enjoy her as much (if not more) then these celebs.

                      Trust me when i say that the best thing to do in this situation is only tell your girl what you think of her and not other girls. Its really not important to tell her that Jessica Alba has great abs... save that for guy talk
                      Originally posted by Job 34:19
                      God is not partial to princes and does not favor the rich over the poor, for they are all the work of His hands.

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                      • #12
                        haha, you know when I read this post the first person I thought of was Jessica Alba.... lol

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                        • #13
                          I can't stand Jessica Alba, shes atheist I believe and arrogant.

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                          • #14
                            Originally posted by rchivers View Post
                            haha, you know when I read this post the first person I thought of was Jessica Alba.... lol
                            You know what they say about great minds!
                            Originally posted by Job 34:19
                            God is not partial to princes and does not favor the rich over the poor, for they are all the work of His hands.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Originally posted by Scottizzle View Post
                              My girlfriend gets mad at me cause I'm honest with her... I said (some actress) has a nice figure. Obviously she'd get upset, I'd get upset if she was looking at another guy and saying he's better looking than me... Thats human nature... But I have a goal in my mind set on looking like a body builder, right now I am only 146 lbs, but I want to get up to 190 and have the general lean look of Ryan Reynolds, I think he has a very nice build (not gay.) Now my girlfriend is obsessing with her weight and is trying to look like this actress I think has a nice athletic body. Is it wrong of me to think that her body has a nice shape? I think my favorite actor (Ryan Reynolds) has a good shape as well, that doesn't mean I want to date him, lol. I guess I'm appreciating the way their appearance is...
                              Dude,..listen up

                              Never say that another women is beautiful in front of your girl. Automatically she will compare herself to that person. It is how she is built. Her appearance, her looks, her weight, etc are all part of the emotional build of a women. You have a huge task in front of you now, to tell her you love her, tell her why you want to be with her, tell her how beautiful she is.

                              Leaqrn to this now and quick and for the love of God don't do this ever again!!!!
                              Amazzin

                              Obedience to God is more than a soldier obeying his commander. It is our grateful response to the Lover of our souls.

                              CHURCH: Where worship is enjoyed, not endured - Grace is preached, not legalism - And Christ is exalted, not religion!



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