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Mixed Feelings of a Child of God

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  • Discussion Mixed Feelings of a Child of God

    Throughout the Bible we are told…Commanded, to love one another. God has made it perfectly clear that we are in debt to others as far as love goes. The Bible lets us know that God dwells in us only if we love others.

    1. Ok…is it possible to love others even if you don’t feel love for others at all times?

    2. If you don’t feel love for others at all times (even though you love them), does that mean God is dwelling outside of you rather than inside of you?

    3. You love people but…you don’t like them very much, does God still dwell in you?

    John 13:34 A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another;
    as I have loved you, that ye also love one another.

    Romans 13:8 Owe no man any thing, but to love one another: for he that loveth
    another hath fulfilled the law.

    1 John 4:12 No man hath seen God at any time. If we love one another,
    God dwelleth in us, and his love is perfected in us

  • #2
    Originally posted by ohlurdy View Post
    Throughout the Bible we are told…Commanded, to love one another. God has made it perfectly clear that we are in debt to others as far as love goes. The Bible lets us know that God dwells in us only if we love others.

    1. Ok…is it possible to love others even if you don’t feel love for others at all times?

    2. If you don’t feel love for others at all times (even though you love them), does that mean God is dwelling outside of you rather than inside of you?

    3. You love people but…you don’t like them very much, does God still dwell in you?

    John 13:34 A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another;
    as I have loved you, that ye also love one another.

    Romans 13:8 Owe no man any thing, but to love one another: for he that loveth
    another hath fulfilled the law.

    1 John 4:12 No man hath seen God at any time. If we love one another,
    God dwelleth in us, and his love is perfected in us
    Some things to keep in mind:

    A) Being human, our love is inconsistent;

    B) Actions speak louder than words.

    From my perspective, it is OK to not love everyone. The key is what's done for those you don't care for. If you perform acts of kindness and love even when you don't feel like it, that is OK. You can always talk it over with God and reconcile the feelings in time.

    Just a thought.

    OldChurchGuy

    Comment


    • #3
      Originally posted by ohlurdy View Post
      Throughout the Bible we are told…Commanded, to love one another. God has made it perfectly clear that we are in debt to others as far as love goes. The Bible lets us know that God dwells in us only if we love others.

      1. Ok…is it possible to love others even if you don’t feel love for others at all times?

      2. If you don’t feel love for others at all times (even though you love them), does that mean God is dwelling outside of you rather than inside of you?

      3. You love people but…you don’t like them very much, does God still dwell in you?

      John 13:34 A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another;
      as I have loved you, that ye also love one another.

      Romans 13:8 Owe no man any thing, but to love one another: for he that loveth
      another hath fulfilled the law.

      1 John 4:12 No man hath seen God at any time. If we love one another,
      God dwelleth in us, and his love is perfected in us
      If love is a commandment, how can that be? Can you command feelings? No, you can't. But you can command actions.

      These are the actions of Agape love:

      1 Co 13:4-7
      4 Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud 5 or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. 6 It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. 7 Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.

      Holy Bible, New Living Translation ®, copyright © 1996, 2004 by Tyndale Charitable Trust. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers. All rights reserved.
      Blessings,

      Road Warrior


      Proverbs 4:23
      23 Guard your heart above all else,
      for it determines the course of your life.

      Comment


      • #4
        I have been dealing with this same issue recently. Our new pastor is taking a survey, and one question asks if there are people in the fellowship we don't love.

        My response was, "I love everybody--but I don't necessarily like them."

        Loving the unlovely seems a paradox. But that is exactly what Jesus did--to the max.
        Phl 4:11 Not that I speak from want, for I have learned to be content in whatever circumstances I am.

        Comment


        • #5
          Originally posted by ohlurdy View Post
          Throughout the Bible we are told…Commanded, to love one another. God has made it perfectly clear that we are in debt to others as far as love goes. The Bible lets us know that God dwells in us only if we love others.

          1. Ok…is it possible to love others even if you don’t feel love for others at all times?

          2. If you don’t feel love for others at all times (even though you love them), does that mean God is dwelling outside of you rather than inside of you?

          3. You love people but…you don’t like them very much, does God still dwell in you?

          John 13:34 A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another;
          as I have loved you, that ye also love one another.

          Romans 13:8 Owe no man any thing, but to love one another: for he that loveth
          another hath fulfilled the law.

          1 John 4:12 No man hath seen God at any time. If we love one another,
          God dwelleth in us, and his love is perfected in us

          I remember when my kids did something that was disobedient. I told them, "I will always love you, but I don't LIKE you very much right now." I loved them, but sure didn't love what they had done.

          I don't think it is humanly possible for us to love everybody. Anyone who says they do probably isn't being totally honest about it. We can, however, desire that their soul not be lost. I think this is how we are to "love" others. I have a next-door neighbor who is very inconsiderate and insensitive to the inconveniences they cause others in the area. Do I love them? No. Do I hate them? NO. But, I do pray that they will find the Lord because I don't want anyone to die and go to hell. So I try to show them the love of God at all times. I am concerned about their soul and where they will spend eternity. In the same respect, there are literally millions of people in the world that I don't know and will never know. Do I love them? No. But I do want them to go to heaven. I love their soul, and I don't want them to suffer in hell.

          Now, this leads to another issue. Are we to show Christian love to those around us? You bet! There are people in this world who may never hear a sermon or read a Bible, but we should show them the love of Christ at all times. Why? Because we love their souls, and want to be a good witness of God's love to them - kindness, compassion, courtesy, helping when we can, etc. But this is different from the love we have for God, our spouse, our parents, our children, or close friends.

          I hope this helps.

          God Bless.
          "I will be glad and rejoice in thee: I will sing praise to thy name, O thou most High." Psalm 9:2

          Comment


          • #6
            Originally posted by ohlurdy View Post
            Throughout the Bible we are told…Commanded, to love one another. God has made it perfectly clear that we are in debt to others as far as love goes. The Bible lets us know that God dwells in us only if we love others.

            1. Ok…is it possible to love others even if you don’t feel love for others at all times?
            Agape love (which is the type of love that God commands - and also has for us) is unconditional love, not based on emotions. So if you don't 'feel' like you love someone, it has nothing to do with unconditionally loving them the way God loves us.

            Comment


            • #7
              Originally posted by OldChurchGuy View Post
              Some things to keep in mind:

              A) Being human, our love is inconsistent;

              B) Actions speak louder than words.

              From my perspective, it is OK to not love everyone. The key is what's done for those you don't care for. If you perform acts of kindness and love even when you don't feel like it, that is OK. You can always talk it over with God and reconcile the feelings in time.

              Just a thought.

              OldChurchGuy
              I will keep that in mind...our love is inconsistent-thanks

              Comment


              • #8
                Originally posted by RoadWarrior View Post
                If love is a commandment, how can that be? Can you command feelings? No, you can't. But you can command actions.

                These are the actions of Agape love:

                1 Co 13:4-7
                4 Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud 5 or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. 6 It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. 7 Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.

                Holy Bible, New Living Translation ®, copyright © 1996, 2004 by Tyndale Charitable Trust. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers. All rights reserved.
                Thanks, that makes sense with love being a command it commands action but some of the actions do require feelings, but I guess not feelings that prevent love. The fruit of the spirit is also long suffering. How is long suffering an action that requires no feelings?

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by SIG View Post
                  I have been dealing with this same issue recently. Our new pastor is taking a survey, and one question asks if there are people in the fellowship we don't love.

                  My response was, "I love everybody--but I don't necessarily like them."

                  Loving the unlovely seems a paradox. But that is exactly what Jesus did--to the max.
                  Thanks now that you bring that up that reminds me of Peter cutting off the ear and Paul persecuting. I guess this love thing is a process and we have to go from one part to growing into the next part of it.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Originally posted by graceforme View Post
                    I remember when my kids did something that was disobedient. I told them, "I will always love you, but I don't LIKE you very much right now." I loved them, but sure didn't love what they had done.

                    I don't think it is humanly possible for us to love everybody. Anyone who says they do probably isn't being totally honest about it. We can, however, desire that their soul not be lost. I think this is how we are to "love" others. I have a next-door neighbor who is very inconsiderate and insensitive to the inconveniences they cause others in the area. Do I love them? No. Do I hate them? NO. But, I do pray that they will find the Lord because I don't want anyone to die and go to hell. So I try to show them the love of God at all times. I am concerned about their soul and where they will spend eternity. In the same respect, there are literally millions of people in the world that I don't know and will never know. Do I love them? No. But I do want them to go to heaven. I love their soul, and I don't want them to suffer in hell.

                    Now, this leads to another issue. Are we to show Christian love to those around us? You bet! There are people in this world who may never hear a sermon or read a Bible, but we should show them the love of Christ at all times. Why? Because we love their souls, and want to be a good witness of God's love to them - kindness, compassion, courtesy, helping when we can, etc. But this is different from the love we have for God, our spouse, our parents, our children, or close friends.

                    I hope this helps.

                    God Bless.
                    Thanks that was a lot of wisdom you taught. I do believe that I love everyone it's just that I don't feel love some times. With God it's more like I love Him with everything with all of my being, and with man it's like, "Yea, I love you"

                    You brought up a really good point about loving someone enough to want them to be saved. I hadn't thought about that, but I always pray for lost souls to be saved. I guess the feelings can be summed up in that right there-loving others enough to care about their souls. Thanks a bunch.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by Sold Out View Post
                      Agape love (which is the type of love that God commands - and also has for us) is unconditional love, not based on emotions. So if you don't 'feel' like you love someone, it has nothing to do with unconditionally loving them the way God loves us.
                      I didn't understand all of that but thanks I think you're saying we have to have unconditional love like God.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Originally posted by ohlurdy View Post
                        Throughout the Bible we are told…Commanded, to love one another. God has made it perfectly clear that we are in debt to others as far as love goes. The Bible lets us know that God dwells in us only if we love others.

                        1. Ok…is it possible to love others even if you don’t feel love for others at all times?
                        Yes, absolutely. The original Greek word in the Bible that our Bible translates as "love" is "agape". Agape is a type of "love" that is primarily a choice, not a feeling. It will usually have feelings that follow having made the choice, but the choice has to come first. The kind of love that you are thinking of is spoken of in Greek as "phileo", which is the kind of affection that one has for a relative or a very close friend. It definitely involves emotions. That is NOT the kind of love that the Bible commands us to have for everybody.
                        Originally posted by ohlurdy View Post
                        2. If you don’t feel love for others at all times (even though you love them), does that mean God is dwelling outside of you rather than inside of you?
                        Nope, not at all. Look at how Jesus behaved towards the Pharisees in Matthew 23. Would you say He was full of warm fuzzies for them?
                        Originally posted by ohlurdy View Post
                        3. You love people but…you don’t like them very much, does God still dwell in you?
                        "Liking" somebody (or "phileoing" them) is not the same as "agapeing" them. You have to understand there's a difference.
                        Originally posted by ohlurdy View Post
                        John 13:34 A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another;
                        as I have loved you, that ye also love one another.

                        Romans 13:8 Owe no man any thing, but to love one another: for he that loveth
                        another hath fulfilled the law.

                        1 John 4:12 No man hath seen God at any time. If we love one another,
                        God dwelleth in us, and his love is perfected in us
                        Go into the original Greek of these verses and you'll find the word "agape" in there, not "phileo". Agape is a choice, not a feeling.
                        ----------------------------------------------
                        When the plain sense of Scripture make sense, seek no other sense.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Originally posted by ohlurdy View Post
                          Thanks, that makes sense with love being a command it commands action but some of the actions do require feelings, but I guess not feelings that prevent love. The fruit of the spirit is also long suffering. How is long suffering an action that requires no feelings?
                          Look for it in a different translation - you will find that it means patience.

                          Actions don't require feelings, but feelings are often present. The thing is that we don't go by our feelings when acting in agape love. We go by obedience to God's command.

                          Don't expect to be able to do this all perfectly immediately, by the way. This is like a kindergarten class; we all have to grow in being able to actually do this kind of love. The best thing about it is when we can't, we go to God in prayer. Let Him know we can't do it on our own, ask Him to love the other person through us in that hard place.
                          Blessings,

                          Road Warrior


                          Proverbs 4:23
                          23 Guard your heart above all else,
                          for it determines the course of your life.

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Originally posted by ohlurdy View Post
                            Throughout the Bible we are told…Commanded, to love one another. God has made it perfectly clear that we are in debt to others as far as love goes. The Bible lets us know that God dwells in us only if we love others.

                            1. Ok…is it possible to love others even if you don’t feel love for others at all times?

                            2. If you don’t feel love for others at all times (even though you love them), does that mean God is dwelling outside of you rather than inside of you?

                            3. You love people but…you don’t like them very much, does God still dwell in you?

                            John 13:34 A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another;
                            as I have loved you, that ye also love one another.

                            Romans 13:8 Owe no man any thing, but to love one another: for he that loveth
                            another hath fulfilled the law.

                            1 John 4:12 No man hath seen God at any time. If we love one another,
                            God dwelleth in us, and his love is perfected in us
                            Would that be more of a case of you do love but you do not love what they may do, as in God loving us even though we sin?

                            Firstfruits

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              I believe agape love is also proactive in that it seeks ways to love others before they know they need or want it. It doesn't wait to respond to the overtures of others, but acts first and without expecting anything in return.

                              God's love is like that. We love God because he first loved us, and he loved us while we were still his enemies.

                              Comment

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