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  • I don't know what is wrong with me

    My church has amazing praise and worship services and alter calls. You can really feel the Holy Spirit moving within people in the church. I want to experience what others in my church do, but I can't seem to get into it like others seem to. I usually sit there feeling so empty, alone and void when services turn out like this.

    I feel so out of place, like I don't belong there, when I see others praising and worshipping the Lord the way they do. I know that I received the Holy Spirit when I was saved, but like I said above I just feel so empty and alone inside.

    I don't know how to explain this, but you know how people get emotional during services. I've never experienced getting emotional during church services. Actually I did get a little emotional when the thoughts of feeling like a failure came over me. I don't know, maybe I just don't want to cry in front of others. But that isn't what matters, all that matters is you and God and what God is dealing with you at that time. I know it may sound strange, but I would like to experience that because I feel like it is a release.

    I just don't know what is wrong with me. I don't know why I can't experience what others do. I feel like failure as a Christian. I hope some of that made sense. If you have any insights on this or anything let me know. I'm just trying to figure out what is wrong with me, so that I may be able to experience the full glory that the Lord has for me.
    Last edited by *Living~By~Faith*; Oct 6th 2008, 04:55 PM.

  • #2



    I don't know how to explain this, but you know how people get emotional during services. I've never experienced getting emotional during church services.


    I think you hit it on the head when you said "emotional response"
    There are many people who respond emotionally in a service yet lack any real walk with the Lord. It's sad to say that many times such responses are a subtle form of spiritual competition. As we walk further with the Lord we understand that the word ( Jesus) comes in and divides our soul from spirit(heb 4:12) and this results in a mature discernment of what is truly spiritual.

    I just don't know what is wrong with me. I don't know why I can't experience what others do. I also feel like failure as a Christian. I hope some of that made sense. If you have any insights on this or anything let me know. I'm just trying to figure out what is wrong with me, so that I may be able to experience the full glory that the Lord has for me.

    It's important for you to connect with the Lord in worship and totally devote yourself to beholding him and appreciating his many virtues . This connection will infuse you with life and peace to the degree that you will not be looking around to see how others are responding. Many of the emotional responses you see are from immature saints trying to fit in with the status quo. If you want to truly enter into worship the first thing you need to do is stop looking around and focus your being entirely on Jesus and the Father. Remember this is their time. The Father looks with expectation for those who will focus entirely upon him. If you practice this I promise that after your souls is tested then you will feel his presence as never before.
    Last edited by The Preacher; Oct 6th 2008, 07:53 AM. Reason: spelling,formatting

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    • #3
      I've been there, my friend

      I too know what it's like to see others "moved" in worship. However, just because you don't stand up and shout your praises, does not mean the spirit of the lord isn't in you. When you sit in that chair and watch others shout their joy, take the time to remember the different ways people express their faith. Find your own person form of devotion. Perhaps you'll decide a simple wave to the heavens will be your sign of devotion.

      and if you truely feel out of place, perhaps you should explore worship at a different church. Find something where you feel comfortable all the time. Worship shouldn't make you upset or uncomfortable.

      After all...it's all about love

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      • #4
        Originally posted by The Preacher View Post

        I think you hit it on the head when you said "emotional response"
        There are many people who respond emotionally in a service yet lack any real walk with the Lord.



        Many of the emotional responses you see are from immature saints trying to fit in with the status quo.


        I'm curious how you know this?


        My Blog

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        • #5
          Originally posted by *Living~By~Faith* View Post
          I just don't know what is wrong with me. I don't know why I can't experience what others do. I also feel like failure as a Christian. I hope some of that made sense. If you have any insights on this or anything let me know. I'm just trying to figure out what is wrong with me, so that I may be able to experience the full glory that the Lord has for me.
          I think perhaps if you focus more on the Lord and less on what people are doing around you, your time in church will be more fulfilling.
          My Blog

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          • #6
            Originally posted by *Living~By~Faith* View Post
            My church has amazing praise and worship services and alter calls. You can really feel the Holy Spirit moving within people in the church. I want to experience what others in my church do, but I can't seem to get into it like others seem to. I usually sit there feeling so empty, alone and void when services turn out like this.

            I feel so out of place, like I don't belong there, when I see others praising and worshipping the Lord the way they do. I know that I received the Holy Spirit when I was saved, but like I said above I just feel so empty and alone inside.

            I don't know how to explain this, but you know how people get emotional during services. I've never experienced getting emotional during church services. Actually I did get a little emotional when the thoughts of feeling like a failure came over me. I don't know, maybe I just don't want to cry in front of others. But that isn't what matters, all that matters is you and God and what God is dealing with you at that time. I know it may sound strange, but I would like to experience that because I feel like it is a release.

            I just don't know what is wrong with me. I don't know why I can't experience what others do. I also feel like failure as a Christian. I hope some of that made sense. If you have any insights on this or anything let me know. I'm just trying to figure out what is wrong with me, so that I may be able to experience the full glory that the Lord has for me.
            Living~By~Faith...I am not sure what type of church you attend but I would probably feel as uncomfortable as you are in seeing people do this. And as empty. I am NOT saying there is a thing wrong with churches that have these types of emotional expression by their members...its just I have never belonged to a church like that. The churches I have always attended were very calm and quite (unless we were singing or all saying the Lord's prayer together.). Rarely did anyone say Amen out loud. The people attending these types of churches are just reserved and more conversative is all. I tried visiting a church where people were more vocal but I was very uncomfortable and felt exactly like you do...left out and empty. It may be your personality just isn't suited for this type of a church and you need a more conversative church to attend. I can't tell you how many times I did feel very moved during a sermon or a song and cried, but quietly. I have seen many others as deeply touched too but we just keep it to ourselves and try not to disrupt the service. If someone is so moved to tears they can't be quite about it they usually leave and go to the restroom until they can regain control.

            This may sound odd to those that go to more vocal churches...its just the type of church many of us were raised in. Different churches for different personalities is all....no one right or better then another is how I see it. Just something to think about and consider. I don't think there is a thing wrong with you...you just may be better suited in a church like I described is all.

            One other thought. My very deepest, most emotional spiritually moving times with God have been when I am home alone. I may put on some praise music and just be singing to that and praising Him...or in deep prayer...whatever it may be and those feelings you talked about happen. You don't have to be in a church to experience God.

            God bless
            "People do not drift toward holiness. Apart from grace-driven effort, people do not gravitate toward godliness, prayer, obedience to Scripture, faith, and delight in the Lord. We drift toward compromise and call it tolerance; We drift toward disobedience and call it freedom; We drift toward superstition and call it faith. We cherish the indiscipline of lost self-control and call it relaxation; we slouch toward prayerlessness and delude ourselves into thinking we have escaped legalism; we slide toward godlessness and convince ourselves we have been liberated?" - D A Carson

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            • #7
              Hi Living-by-Faith.

              You know, the user name you chose has the answer to your quandary. You live by faith - and although there will be times when you experience and feel great and beautiful things, that response isn't what saves you, nor is it proof of your salvation. You don't know God because you feel good about Him, or because you have feelings of joy. All of us go through dry times, times when we can't feel Him, or when we doubt our responses, and look at others, thinking they are somehow holier than us.

              Instead of looking at what you imagine you lack, or what you imagine others have, remember to focus on Jesus. Even when you feel dry and depressed, or when you feel nothing at all, look to HIM. Read what saints of old had to go through... Jeremiah, or Job. Jesus Christ Himself felt at one point that He'd lost contact with God. And yet even in that utter absence of communion and joy He obeyed God utterly.

              We have to model ourselves on Jesus. If we feel that we have to perform, or generate emotional responses, to please God, we're missing the point. He loves you anyway. He loves you always. He is with you - and you especially please Him when you obey Him, even though you feel you're getting nothing from it.

              Don't lose hope or heart. It's all about Him - and you know He'll never forsake you.
              Please could everyone pray for Mieke and Charles.

              My testimony http://bibleforums.org/forum/showthr...ight=testimony

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              • #8
                Dear Living by Faith,

                It's okay to have your own personality and not be like everybody else. I'm naturally more reserved, and so I just watch everybody else hop about and shout around.

                Being spiritual has nothing to do with being emotional, as emotions reside in the soul, and so there is a big difference.

                There's nothing wrong with you as long as you continue to obey God and pursue a relationship with Him, and continue to trust Jesus to guide you along.

                And you cannot assess your relationship with God based on what happens during a church service and how other people act. It can only be measured against daily life. So please don't compare yourself, and don't be discouraged. How do you know how those other people act during the week and what is really going on? You don't. So please do yourself a favor and get your eyes off them during worshp, and on God, and you will be fine.

                Do you always feel empty and alone, or only during church services?

                If only during church, then maybe it's time to move on and go elsewhere. Or plug yourself into a home group and really get to know some people and have fellowship with them, if you haven't done so yet. It can get quite lonely if we want to be part of a group only for 2 hours a week, and really never get to know one another personally. That's not what church is about, anyway.

                Blessings.

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                • #9
                  If this is where you believe the Lord wants you to be then maybe you need to pray as to why the uncomfortable feeling. I am in a church where music and praise tends to be loud and people do raise their hands. But not everyone does nor is expected to do the same thing. We have quiet moments during the service too. I always prefer them myself; but I also like to be able to raise my hands up to the Lord when we are praising Him.

                  After praying some more about this and giving it some time.. if you believe you are being called to be somewhere else then maybe it is time to consider looking for another place of worship. I encourage you to make sure it is a solid bible believing atmosphere where the Word of God is preached. As has been shared here there are different kinds of services and not all are right for everyone.

                  The main thing is to get before the Lord yourself and seek the guidance of the Holy Spirit.

                  peace and prayers,

                  owl
                  "The flowers appear on the earth,
                  the time of singing has come,
                  and the voice of the turtledove
                  is heard in our land
                  ." SofS 2:12 (RSV)

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                  • #10
                    What is the foundation of all scripture - LOVE.

                    What does Paul say about Spitual gifts in relation to - LOVE

                    I'll share just one verse, 1 Corinthians 13:13 For now there are faith, hope and love. But of these three, the greatest is LOVE.

                    One church/ one bible/ one Lord Jesus Christ

                    Your failure would be sitting alone and not realising your brothers and sisters in Christ love you. Your failure would be not sharing the Word of God the bible. Your failure would be not believing your heavenly Father has you and me in his arms and loves us more than we can imagine in this life.

                    I think you are wiser than you think, God bless you. SofTy.
                    1 Corinthians 1:12-13 Now this I say, that every one of you saith, I am of Paul; and I of Apollos: and I of Cephas; and I of Christ.

                    Is Christ divided? was Paul crucified for you? or were ye baptised in the name of Paul?

                    KJV

                    May the power of the Spirit of our God unite us. SofTy.

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                    • #11
                      Sunday nights are usually the only time services are like that. We also had communion last night, which made a difference in the services.

                      I don't feel like I belong at my church, but it would also be hard for me to go to another church, so that's not an option until I move to town. But I believe this an attack of the enemy because he doesn't want us in fellowship. I also feel that the Lord lead me to this church due to the events leading up to me coming there. So I feel I'd be getting out of God's will if I left. I really do enjoy the services and usually get something out of it just by sitting there absorbing it all in. I have learned so much at this church and am now involved in classes where I can continue to learn. I've also been delivered from a lot of things that were keeping me from growing closer to the Lord. I'm also beginning to become more involved in this church.

                      I think a lot of this doesn't really have anything to do with the church, but it's about things within myself. I am more reserved and conservative. I know that my "problem" is that I have a hard time focusing completely on the Lord with all of the other people around me. I began sitting on the side in the front at my church a couple of weeks ago, so that I can't see as many people during praise and worship. That has helped me a bit to be able to focus more fully on the Lord. But it doesn't really help when there is an alter call.

                      I feel like I'm going through a deep valley once again. It's all just getting to be too much for me to handle. I've been crying on and off since getting home from church last night. I'm just so overwhelmed, stressed and worried with everything going on in my life right now -- wanting to move to town, my dad's mental and physical health and liking a guy that likes someone else. I thought I finally let go of the last one, but I'm having a hard time since he's made it known who he likes in the church. I know I need and must give this all to God, but I don't know how to do that without taking it back like I have done in the past.
                      Last edited by *Living~By~Faith*; Oct 7th 2008, 05:53 AM.

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                      • #12
                        Originally posted by Whispering Grace View Post
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                        I'm curious how you know this?




                        After 25 years of worshiping in charismatic fellowships you get ample opportunity to compare the responses of some believers with their actual walk. I have had the baptism and walked in the gifts of the Spirit for many years but I think your question was actually answered best in my previous post. The word of God comes in and begins to divide your soulish motives and desires from your spiritual ones. As this process proceeds you gain an ever increasing sense of discernment and insight into spiritual things. You begin to notice that people are responding to madision avenue tactics, psychological manipulation and sheer power of suggestion by worship leaders who are trying to pump up a meeting. In certain instances the insight you have gained will show you that God is actually GRIEVED with certain people and yet they are jumping and shouting more than anyone.

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                        • #13
                          Originally posted by The Preacher View Post


                          It's important for you to connect with the Lord in worship and totally devote yourself to beholding him and appreciating his many virtues . This connection will infuse you with life and peace to the degree that you will not be looking around to see how others are responding. Many of the emotional responses you see are from immature saints trying to fit in with the status quo. If you want to truly enter into worship the first thing you need to do is stop looking around and focus your being entirely on Jesus and the Father. Remember this is their time. The Father looks with expectation for those who will focus entirely upon him. If you practice this I promise that after your souls is tested then you will feel his presence as never before.

                          I like this answer. I would also like to add that our (true) worship of the Lord at church is an extension of how we relate to Him the rest of the week.

                          Precious soul, are you having trouble connecting with or believing in the Lord's love for you outside of Church? A heart that really has come to believe in the Lord's uncondtional love for them will "connect" with the Lord alot easier.

                          I have "seen" both sides. I had great difficulty believing the Lord loved me unconditonally for many years. But, when the Lord slowly, as I was able, began to heal me in that area, I was able to connect with Him much easier in songs or hymns of worship and praise.

                          Just a thought......perhaps I am wrong here...

                          "Remember this is their time"...I love that comment, The Preacher! How often I forget that. Sometimes at home a song will play and the Lord will whisper in my ear. "........", will you come and worship me?"
                          ~ My testimony~

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                          • #14
                            I do have trouble grasping God's love for me. I really struggle with being able to fully grasp Jesus dying for me. I believe it, but it's like I can't grasp my mind around that.

                            I do feel empty and alone most of the time, so it's not just during church. I also struggle praising and worshiping the Lord when I'm alone as well.

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                            • #15
                              Hmm. Have you been hurt or traumatized somehow in years past?

                              I used to have massive problems accepting God's love because of things I happened when I grew up. I could never believe I deserved His love, and always felt like I had to earn it, and there was always a wall that would come up during prayer time.

                              I remember a discussion with God during a car trip once when I was feeling particularly dour, when I said "Lord, You know I love You, right?" His response was "I know. I just wanted you to know that I know." Which resulted in me doing much boo-hooing because I understood then that God did indeed hear my heart, and saw my love for Him in it, and that He would care enough to let me know, so I no longer had to wonder about it. That went a long way with me finally being able to accept His love for me, and learn to trust Him completely. But I carried a lot of pain around in my soul that had to be remedied and that I had to surrender over the years and allow Him to heal.

                              No, we didn't earn God's love. But we do deserve it, and we are meant to love Him, because He first loved us.

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