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Behavior of children in public elementary schools

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  • sonyasayshello
    replied
    Re: Behavior of children in public elementary schools

    Originally posted by servantsheart View Post
    As a Para Ed. working in the public school system in an elementary school for the past five years I am deeply worried about the furture as a nation with the children we are serving every day.
    Since God was removed from our public school system and He is not apart of most homes today...parents do not have the Biblical guide lines to bring their children up with Godly attitudes, good morals, good work ethics, accountability, trust worthyness, good manners, and the list goes on and on and on.
    Don't get me wrong about what I am going to describe to you...I do enjoy being with children and helping them learn... And it is not to say that there are not 'good' parents in the world today.....BUT
    I over see the children from kindergarten to fifth grade at breakfast and the kindergarten and first grade during lunch times. The rest of the day I am with one student one-on-one all day.
    I try my best to correct with kindess but firmness when I see...The children during meal time not showing pliteness to teachers and staff, or to fellow students. They eat and talk at the same time with mouths filled with food, some try to touch the food of others (especially if someone brought their lunch and they have candy or sweets), they want to drink their milk right from the carton rather then using a straw, they don't use napkins to wipe their mouth or hands, when they hand you their tray they don't say, "thank you", if they spill something they simply expect you to clean it up and if you ask them to help they don't have the slightest idea about how to do it, they talk so loudly that the lights have to be blinked off and on to get their attention to ask them to talk quietly, the fifth graders make rude faces or comments if asked to lower their voices,...
    In class they disrupt the entire class with antics, talking, wondering about the room, picking at other students, plainly telling you that you can not make them do their work, they don't complete home work assignments and return them, ....
    Are you getting the idea that kids today are not being brought up at home and taught social skills, manners, politeness, responsibility, respect, how to care about their neighbor, how to dress for school or even the need for taking a bath and washing their hair, washing hands after using the restroom, how to drink from a water fountain without putting their whole mouth over it ( I have even seen a student spit in the water fountain),...
    The children I see daily talk about things that you would not believe, they talk about TV shows I don't even watch or movies, they read anything they want to read ( providing they can read) and it is Not just the school who teaches reading...children depend on parents who read to them and listen to them read in order to succed, they carry cell phones, they listen to any and all kinds of music on their MP3 players, they have their own tV's in their rooms and computers, they are dropped off at the local mall to entertain themselves all day,...
    And yet parents get upset if the school decides that a child has acted so badly at school that the school takes away a class trip or classroom party to help teach the child that they must behave ...this because we no longer have corpal punishment...let alone parents who would spank their own children at home and make them behave...
    WHY ARE PARENTS TODAY NOT BRINGING UP THEIR OWN CHILDREN? Parents act like it is the schools job to teach and raise their children.
    Am I the only older person working with children today and seeing our youth growing up and not being able to face the 'real' world as college students, working adults, and future parents.
    PS my husband was a principal for 14 years at an elementary school...he actually had a child in his office for correction and was trying to phone the parent when the child walked up behind him and put a pencil to the back of his neck and said, "Bang"!
    Hello,

    You do have a problem with a statement. God is not removed from schools. Human beings are not so strong! Many students, teachers and parents are Christians. They love Jesus. When they pray before the test. They read the Bible at home. They try and wear religious necklaces. God has not yet gone.

    I am sorry for bad behavior. However, the children of such bad manners is not important. Behavior is not important. First of all, Jesus, they should be loving. Where is their heart? How is everyone? Do they love Christ? They will be saved? Wash them in blood and then teach them to eat gracefully, but do not the last things first.

    Parents should be responsible. They teach behavior. But the school, the teacher's job is it too. The phone is OK if you have children, or television. Monitor how they watch it. Question it. Why do they like it? Well, they believe, because they need to look at it because friends do. Tell them no. My children fight. They see the television or film. Natasha sees girls in underwear dance and thinks she has to do it. Ilya, my son, he 10. He likes violence shows. We have not let him look at them. Too bad he likes. They are not ok for him. Do not mind the absurdity. Use the time wisely. Read a good book. Play outside. Be healthy. Worship the Lord. In this case, it is the parents business, but it should be a teacher doing it to when parents can't.

    Leave a comment:


  • Spike
    replied
    Re: Behavior of children in public elementary schools

    Originally posted by FaithfulSheep View Post
    I am a younger teacher (this is my 4th year) and I see the same things. I work at an inner-city elementary school and see much of the same things you mentioned. Students interrupt the class, they yell, they throw things, they bully, they call each other horrible names... and why? Well, they are many times taught that is okay.

    I have a child in my class, who we will call "Mary." Mary pushes the other kids and yells at them to get what she wants. One time I asked her why she did these things to other kids. She told me to get what she wants. I asked her if that was the right thing to do. She responded yes. So I followed that up with why is it okay to push others, hit them, and call them names? Her response... "That's what mamma told me to do." And yes, I truly believe that is what she was taught.

    A lot of the kids in this school has seen more and been through more than I've ever been through in my life. (And they are just 8 and 9). Are they respectful? No. Are they kind to others (students and adults)? No. But you know, I've learned that with these kids, you can make a big difference.

    I know that when I hug some of those kids, that's the only hug they will get all day. When I tell them what a great job they did, that may be the only praise they get all day. When they come to me to talk because someone was sent to jail the night before or stabbed or hit by a car or wrongfully arrested, I may be the only one they feel safe enough and comfortable enough around to let me know how they feel. It is in schools like this that we can make the greatest difference in this children's lives. I asked the Lord to place me in a school where I can make a difference, and He did. And though it is tough, I am so thankful He did.
    Trust me, they will remember you rname when they're adults. I was one of those kids, and I remember three teachers who were the best male role models I could ever have. Mr. George Lettner, Mr. Paul Carter, and Dr. Lovelace (For some reason, he's the only one of the three whose first name I never knew) were the /best/ teachers /ever/. Some days, they were the only reason I'd fight through the gang violence and craziness at school /for/. I so loved them! I could always count on them if I needed an ear, or even forty minutes of peace. Mr. Lettner, especially, was good about letting me stay in his classroom over lunch just so I could have some silence. He wasn't supposed to (you know, that whole rule) but he did it anyway, and never a grumble of protest. I even managed to get better math grades because he'd take the time to go over my homework with me.

    Anyway, I just wanted to encourage you to keep on keeping on, because you're right: You might be the one thing that gets those kids to keep on keeping on. If you never hear it from them, hear it from me: THANK YOU.

    Leave a comment:


  • Godslittleangel
    replied
    Originally posted by Lorren View Post
    It's completely different for single parents. Obviously they have to work. And some people have medical expenses or other unavoidable costs that are too much for one person to handle.

    There are people, however, that would rather work than spend time with their kids. I have a friend who makes more than my dh ever has, and his wife chose to go to work. Every Saturday they go to the mall to spend her paycheck on junk.

    Unfortunately, my daughter and their daughter are friends, but as they get older, their daughter is learning things from the public schools that are not very good. We caught them jumping up and down naked on a trampoline the other day. I don't really like to do it, but unless something changes, we're not going to be able to allow them to see each other any more because she has become a bad influence.
    It cna also be that way with families that are married. My mom was a stay at home mom for most of our years in school. My dad farmed. When I was in high school, and farming business started to spiral downward due to market, floods and bad weather adn crops, my mom was forced to get a part time job to help pay back the loans and bills. we live in a small area, its not like one can just quit their job and pick up another one just like that. So we had no choice, luckily, her job was at high school and she was home when we left for school and when we came home from school as she workd 9am to 1 pm and no weekends. Now she is working 2 jobs, and my dad is owrking 2-3 jobs. me nad my brohters are done with high school now but I'm sure this would hav happened even if they were still in school. My dad quit farming this past summer due to it getting worse nad having so many loans to pay back he couldn't afford to have a bad year of farming.

    Some families income isn't enough to just go with one, some are forced to have both parents work. Sometimes you can't do anything about it. I'm sure they would love to stay home but in order to put food ont he talbe, keep the house, and all that, they have to do what they have to do to get by. I went to a public school my whole life, and elementary adn middle school I was picked on alot. High school got a little better, my class was still cliquey but not as much harrassment (the girl who did most of it dropped out). We had some bad teachers (middle school) but the rest in elementary and high school i liked. They were nice and cared. It was a small school and they knew everyone. Which had its good things about ita dn its bad things. But they knew ya. But I don't know, I can't fualt all families for having both parents working, there are those who do work because they want to and can live with one income but there are mahy who can't live off of one income. So we can't judge all of them. we don'tknow their situations.

    Leave a comment:


  • HaveMercy
    replied
    I substitute teach for a living (haven't been able to get a full time job yet since I only just graduated) and I know what you guys are talking about! Elementary schools aren't actually that bad and I always enjoy teaching in them (there seems to be more discipline in elem schools, at least the ones I've been in) but the middle/high schools are really lacking in any type of effective discipline. I know when I first started I was amazed to see the extremely disrespectful way students talked to teachers, cussing them out and ignoring them when they were told to do something. And these aren't inner city schools I'm talking about, these are nice suburban schools. I think the problem is a lot of kids aren't taught any type of structure or consistent discipline at home, and they don't really get it in school either. I have to admit that if I had kids I would be tempted to homeschool them if given the chance once they reached middle school.

    Leave a comment:


  • jesseswife
    replied
    Servantsheart, I know EXACTLY what you're talking about. I was a public school educator for 3 years. I taught middle school the first 2 years and 5th grade last year. The things I experienced there and the behaviors that I saw solidified my desire to home school my own children. My husband had been against it, but hearing how my days were and the things that went on convinced him as well. I've had people say to me that Christian parents should send their kids to the public schools so that they can be "beacons of light" for the other kids. The problem is that kids often want to fit in so badly that even kids from strong Christian families end up being pulled astray by the other kids. I saw many instances of that, but yet NONE of the "beacons of light leading other children to Christ." It all starts at home though. I would call home due to behavior and frequently, there would either be no change or they would change for a day (at which time their parents would let them off punishment and they would go right back to their old behaviors). Consequences at school, such as taking recess, detention, etc. had no effect because no matter how many times you explained the importance of school and why everyone needs to follow the rules, they still felt entitled to do as they pleased. They would sit at recess/in detention glaring at you and then go right back to the bad behaviors as soon as recess was over. Even praise and "catching them being good" had little to no effect on their overall behavior.

    When I was in school, the behaviors that I described above (and the lack of effect from consistent discipline and praise) would have applied to maybe 1 or 2 kids in the class. Today, it frequently applies to half or more of the kids in a class. It's a sad and frustrating situation.

    Leave a comment:


  • lisaluvsjesus
    replied
    I love public schools

    Aloha,
    I've been an educator in the public school for the past 20 years. 14 years as a teacher and 6 years as an administrator. I LOVE PUBLIC SCHOOLS! Yes, there are students that have behavior problems but many don't know our Lord Jesus Christ. I love it when Jesus told the Jewish people that he was the fulfillment of Isaiah's prophecy.

    "17 The scroll of Isaiah the prophet was handed to him. He unrolled the scroll and found the place where this was written:

    18 “The Spirit of the Lord is upon me,
    for he has anointed me to bring Good News to the poor.
    He has sent me to proclaim that captives will be released,
    that the blind will see,
    that the oppressed will be set free,
    19 and that the time of the Lord’s favor has come.[a]”

    As Jesus and his disciples ministered the Holy Spirit anointed them and they proclaimed the freedom of the captives and that the blind will see and the oppressed set free. When they proclaimed it captives were released, the blind did see and the oppressed were set free!!! Mary Magdelene, Paul, you and I, etc. are all examples of this. PRAISE JESUS!! Please understand that the freedom is not only physical it also refers to the spiritual.

    Many say that God was taken out of the schools but no, as long as there are christians on campus God is there. We just have to invite Him in. If we are teachers, we invite Him into our classrooms. A simple phrase, "LORD come and be Lord here in this place. I pray that you'll be with each student that comes into this classroom." is sufficient. Praying over all the chairs and doors, etc. also has positive effects. If there are students who are struggling I pray for them by name. I've seen SIGNIFiCANT results over time. As administrators, we invite Him into our schools. The same phrase is used but instead of class we say school. We also cover our staff in prayer. As I pass the door of a teacher, I will say a short silent prayer and move to the next door. For staff struggling I pray for discernment and that He will show me how to support this person and He does show me.

    Know this...sometimes the changes in students are immediate. Other times, it'll get worse before it gets better because He starts to surface things. At first I thought, "OH NO! Lord why?" But, then He showed me that when things surface we can target pray and also speak to the students about a particular behavior. It's in His KAIROS timing. God is good ALL THE TIME!!

    In Hawaii, the churches from various denominations have come together to walk the campus and pray over schools and it has made an incredible difference. There are schools across America and International schools as well that have followed the lead and they have had significant results.

    www.uipinternational.com/index_hawaii.html
    http://www.uipinternational.com/

    Our Lord God Almighty created the universe and all that is in it. If he can create the universe and all that is in it, then he can change schools. DO YOU KNOW THAT OUR LORD EVEN TRANSFORMED A PRISON?!! This was done in Argentina!! See the website below.

    http://www.harvestevan.org/olmos-prison2.html

    Is this for real? Yes, my daughter went there on a missions trip and she witnessed this first hand!! NO BARS!! The prisoners praying for them. Incredible story!!

    We are called to set the captives free. It's not an easy call. Walking into the schools seems like many like walking into a prison but Jesus is in us and His light beams from us and brings Light to the world. I've seen behaviors change and students eventually coming to the Lord and behaviors change. It's not a fast process but it IS happening. PRAISE GOD!!! "NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE WITH GOD!!"

    Joshua 1:6 says, "6 "Be strong and courageous, because you will lead these people to inherit the land I swore to their forefathers to give them. 7 Be strong and very courageous. Be careful to obey all the law my servant Moses gave you; do not turn from it to the right or to the left, that you may be successful wherever you go. 8 Do not let this Book of the Law depart from your mouth; meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. Then you will be prosperous and successful. 9 Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go."

    So for those that are in public schools, remember our promise from our MIGHTY KING and ALMIGHTY GOD!! "BE STRONG AND COURAGEOUS. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God IS WITH YOU WHERE EVER YOU GO!!! There is a lot of work to be done but the Lord has His plans and may His glorious will be done throughout our world and within our marketplace ministries--public schools!!

    Leave a comment:


  • livingwaters
    replied
    God in Parents

    That's what's missing!! The parents don't know God, most of the time; and some of them that do know HIM, you couldn't tell . . . then, you can't say Jesus in public(at least that's what they're after), you can't pray at school, the Ten Commandments can't be displayed, so ... unless, the church can train up parents to know God and His principles, the children will never learn.

    However, praise the Lord, for the few that do know about God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit. My prayer is that we allow the Holy Spririt to do what He was sent here to do. Let us be bold in teaching our children about God, instead of Harry Potter, computers, games, and on and on. Put gospel music on throughout the house. Put the TV on gospel shows. Go to the movies and watch Christian movies. We cannot continue to be like the world and expect different results. Amen!!!!

    Leave a comment:


  • cdl121
    replied
    We have had good experiences with our children in public school. And I don't see how we can keep God out of public school. He lives inside my daughters; he goes right into the school with them every day.

    Leave a comment:


  • AngelAuthor
    replied
    Originally posted by RoadWarrior View Post
    The things kids do! I don't blame you, I'd not want that influence either. Sounds like time to have some frank discussion, with your daughter, and maybe with the other mom.
    Well there's really no point in having a discussion with her parents. They know what their daughter is up to...(as we were leaving that night, her father was preparing a good spanking for her as well), they just have no control.

    They kind of look at their daughter and the things she's learning and shake their heads sadly....that's it.

    It's a terrible social experiment, but both my wife and I are wondering what our daughters are going to look like 6 years from now in their early teens. They're only 6 (ours) and 7 now, but you can already see pretty big differences in their level of "innocence," and the way they respond to their parents.

    Leave a comment:


  • AngelAuthor
    replied
    Originally posted by Bethany67 View Post
    I did one year of teaching in France - that was enough. Those kids were feral - prostition, drugs, knives ... I was never allowed to be alone with a class because they feared for my safety.


    But... we're supposed to want to be like the Europeans! They have it all put together with their social programs and everything, don't they??

    Leave a comment:


  • Bethany67
    replied
    I don't know what it's like in the US (all out American friends homeschool), but my DH teaches teenagers in London and it's constant fights and knives being confiscated (we have a HUGE teenage knife problem here in London - 22 teens killed this year so far). I remember watching a film called Class of '84 back in 1983 and thought it was farfetched fiction - full body metal detector scanners before kids would be let in the building - well, now I think it was prophetic.

    It starts with the parents. My MIL was headmistress of an elementary school for 25 years ... until one day she called a child to her office to reprimand it. Next day the father burst into her office, grabbed her by the throat, shoved her up against the wall and tried to strangle her. The police did nothing, the school governors refused to support her, and she ended up taking early retirement.

    I did one year of teaching in France - that was enough. Those kids were feral - prostition, drugs, knives ... I was never allowed to be alone with a class because they feared for my safety. I distinctly remember one 12 year old boy who never looked me in the eye all year because he was too busy staring at my chest. Poor kid didn't have a chance - mother and sisters were prostitutes, and Daddy bonding time was going out stealing stuff so Dad could sell it on.

    Leave a comment:


  • SethElijah
    replied
    My children have been going to day care since they were 8 weeks old. They are now 9 and 5 1/2. My husband and I both work full time, but we are working toward being able to have one of us work part time or from home soon. My youngest will be starting kindergarten in a couple of weeks. My oldest is starting 4th grade. He tells me stories of the way kids act at school and at day care. Kids cursing at the teachers, hitting the teachers, acting out in class. I ask them both if they thought their mommy would allow that type of behaviour, and they agree that they do not and would not want to find out. I always get comments from day care, teachers at school, and coaches about how well behaved my children are. At home I know they push their limits, but they both knoow that this is ok at home but in public they are always to show the utmost respect and know there are consequences if they do not. The issue is that most parents do not enforce consequences. Kids from broken homes, the parents many times think of the "poor child and what they have already been through". Adults do not take responsibility for raising their kids anymore and kids learn not to take respponsibility for themselves from their parents.

    Leave a comment:


  • RoadWarrior
    replied
    Originally posted by Lorren View Post
    It's completely different for single parents. Obviously they have to work. And some people have medical expenses or other unavoidable costs that are too much for one person to handle.

    There are people, however, that would rather work than spend time with their kids. I have a friend who makes more than my dh ever has, and his wife chose to go to work. Every Saturday they go to the mall to spend her paycheck on junk.

    Unfortunately, my daughter and their daughter are friends, but as they get older, their daughter is learning things from the public schools that are not very good. We caught them jumping up and down naked on a trampoline the other day. I don't really like to do it, but unless something changes, we're not going to be able to allow them to see each other any more because she has become a bad influence.
    The things kids do! I don't blame you, I'd not want that influence either. Sounds like time to have some frank discussion, with your daughter, and maybe with the other mom.

    Leave a comment:


  • Lorren
    replied
    It's completely different for single parents. Obviously they have to work. And some people have medical expenses or other unavoidable costs that are too much for one person to handle.

    There are people, however, that would rather work than spend time with their kids. I have a friend who makes more than my dh ever has, and his wife chose to go to work. Every Saturday they go to the mall to spend her paycheck on junk.

    Unfortunately, my daughter and their daughter are friends, but as they get older, their daughter is learning things from the public schools that are not very good. We caught them jumping up and down naked on a trampoline the other day. I don't really like to do it, but unless something changes, we're not going to be able to allow them to see each other any more because she has become a bad influence.

    Leave a comment:


  • superwoman8977
    replied
    Originally posted by Duane Morse View Post
    Parents are too caught up in the ways, means and demands of this society.

    How many parents strive to keep one parent home with the children at all times? Not many, by far.
    How many parents both have a time-demanding career, at the expense of their children. Too many, by far.

    They pawn them off to others to raise them. And too often, they are not raised as they should be.


    The Almighty Dollar!

    It is the bane of a Capitalist society, where constant inflation rules the actions and motivations.
    '

    Its not that at all. I am a single mom. I work for the army an hour from home. I do depend on childcare and school for my kids. I am very blessed to have an awesome childcare system for my kindergartner. Parents have to work its that simple. With gas prices over 4.00/gal and 4.25/gal for milk parents need to work. I dont know how many times I have had the teacher call asking for help with this project or that one and me as a single mom just cant make the time. By the time I get home at night (530pm) and get dinner around and the place picked up and kids in bath its bedtime (8pm) and then at 515am our day starts all over again. When I get home from work I will admit I want to get my chores done so I will send Matty to his room where there is a TV and DVD player and X Box and toys and everything so I can get some stuff started, then while the dishwasher is running or the washing machine I come upstairs and we do his homework together. Its not an easy life but its how we have to live our life for the moment, so please dont judge unless you have lived one day in these shoes. In Feb I will be a mom again so now I will have even more responsibility.

    Leave a comment:

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