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  • These gummy bears are the manifestation of evil

    This is what my wife calls "boy humor", and it's too funny not to post, so I'll post it here.

    Amazon sells a product called "Albanese sugar free gummy bears". Because they use some chemical replacement for the sugar, eating too many can lead to some...shall we say...explosive....results.

    The thread topic comes straight out of one of the reviews. "These gummy bears are the manifestation of evil".

    If you read the reviews you'll be laughing out loud.

    Check out the reviews.

    And for the love of God, do not buy this product!

  • #2
    Re: These gummy bears are the manifestation of evil

    Originally posted by Fenris View Post
    This is what my wife calls "boy humor", and it's too funny not to post, so I'll post it here.

    Amazon sells a product called "Albanese sugar free gummy bears". Because they use some chemical replacement for the sugar, eating too many can lead to some...shall we say...explosive....results.

    The thread topic comes straight out of one of the reviews. "These gummy bears are the manifestation of evil".

    If you read the reviews you'll be laughing out loud.

    Check out the reviews.

    And for the love of God, do not buy this product!
    I can't stop laughing...
    Slug1--out

    ~"In the turmoil of any chaos, all it takes is that whisper that is heard like thunder over all the noise and the chaos seems to go away, focus returns and we are comforted in knowing that God has listened to our cry for help."~

    Comment


    • #3
      Re: These gummy bears are the manifestation of evil

      This and the "3 Wolf Moon" T-shirt reviews are the stuff of internet legend.

      Comment


      • #4
        Re: These gummy bears are the manifestation of evil

        Originally posted by Pbminimum View Post
        This and the "3 Wolf Moon" T-shirt reviews are the stuff of internet legend.
        Apparently I'm a bit behind the times. Some of these "legends" only came to my attention recently.

        Comment


        • #5
          Re: These gummy bears are the manifestation of evil

          This beauty from page 25

          Unfortunately, I was unaware of these reviews before consuming satan's little death bears. After reading that these little jewels were made in Austria, I imagine a rouge Nazi chemical weapons scientist escaped to austria after the war and set up shop making unsuspecting masses suffer for their defeat.

          My experience started like many others, some customer dropped off some bags of these for Christmas, after looking at them for the better part of a month I decided to eat some. The first day I had about 20-25 of them, that night i experienced some slight discomfort and crazy dreams , but I did not associate it with the demon spawn gummy bears. The next day, I had about a handful more of these delicious little devils and all hell broke loose. After several short trips to the bathroom and gas noises like I have never heard coming from my stomach before, I decided to head home, but first stop by the store to pick up some antacids.

          Just as I got inside my local grocery store it hit me, I broke out in a cold sweat, my hands were clammy and the pain from my lower intestine was unreal, it felt as if Satan himself was reaching inside of me and spinning my intestines on his finger.
          And it all goes downhill from there.

          Comment


          • #6
            Re: These gummy bears are the manifestation of evil

            OMGoodness. I’m at work crying at my desk from laughter.

            In essentials, unity; in non-essentials, liberty; in all things, charity. - Rupertus Meldenius

            Read your Bible and pray every single day. - Pastor Jon Courson

            If your grace ain't greasier than a bucket full of chitlin's and gravy, you might be a legalist - an internet friend.

            Comment


            • #7
              Re: These gummy bears are the manifestation of evil

              Originally posted by Fenris View Post
              This beauty from page 25



              And it all goes downhill from there.
              Classic... For real though . Google the 3 wolf moon reviews. It's right there with the gummy bears as far as a good laugh.

              Comment


              • #8
                Re: These gummy bears are the manifestation of evil

                Originally posted by TrustGzus View Post
                OMGoodness. I’m at work crying at my desk from laughter.
                I was trying to read it out loud to those I work with... couldn't, I was laughing so hard!
                Slug1--out

                ~"In the turmoil of any chaos, all it takes is that whisper that is heard like thunder over all the noise and the chaos seems to go away, focus returns and we are comforted in knowing that God has listened to our cry for help."~

                Comment


                • #9
                  Re: These gummy bears are the manifestation of evil

                  Originally posted by Slug1 View Post
                  I was trying to read it out loud to those I work with... couldn't, I was laughing so hard!
                  I wouldn’t be able to.

                  In essentials, unity; in non-essentials, liberty; in all things, charity. - Rupertus Meldenius

                  Read your Bible and pray every single day. - Pastor Jon Courson

                  If your grace ain't greasier than a bucket full of chitlin's and gravy, you might be a legalist - an internet friend.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Re: These gummy bears are the manifestation of evil

                    No thanks. I'm already banned from parts of my own house.
                    Those who seek God with all their heart will find Him and be given sight. Those who seek their own agenda will remain blind.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Re: These gummy bears are the manifestation of evil

                      I have personal experience with gummy bears. That was an interesting hour or so.

                      There are some brilliant Amazon reviews for other products. One of my favourites is for uranium ore.

                      I purchased this product 4.47 Billion Years ago and when I opened it today, it was half empty.
                      I got a free cat in the box with this purchase but I'm not sure if I should open it to see if the cat is ok.
                      Mixed this in with rose fertilizer and have blooms nearly one foot in diameter! Drawback is I can't cut them as they growl at me whenever I get near them with the scissors...and they've eaten several small birds and a stray kitten...
                      Do not say, “Why were the old days better than these?” For it is not wise to ask such questions.
                      Ecc 7:10

                      John777 exists to me only in quoted form.


                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Re: These gummy bears are the manifestation of evil

                        Originally posted by teddyv View Post
                        I have personal experience with gummy bears.
                        The cat is simultaneously alive and dead until you open the box. Of course you knew that.....

                        But that being the case....is it possible that gummy bears are not gummy bears until you open the box?
                        Those who seek God with all their heart will find Him and be given sight. Those who seek their own agenda will remain blind.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Re: These gummy bears are the manifestation of evil

                          Originally posted by keck553 View Post
                          The cat is simultaneously alive and dead until you open the box. Of course you knew that.....

                          But that being the case....is it possible that gummy bears are not gummy bears until you open the box?
                          And technically, after 4.47 billion years, half should be lead.
                          Do not say, “Why were the old days better than these?” For it is not wise to ask such questions.
                          Ecc 7:10

                          John777 exists to me only in quoted form.


                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Re: These gummy bears are the manifestation of evil

                            Originally posted by teddyv View Post
                            And technically, after 4.47 billion years, half should be lead.
                            I'm calling the EPA.
                            Those who seek God with all their heart will find Him and be given sight. Those who seek their own agenda will remain blind.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Re: These gummy bears are the manifestation of evil

                              My wife enjoyed the boy humor.

                              In essentials, unity; in non-essentials, liberty; in all things, charity. - Rupertus Meldenius

                              Read your Bible and pray every single day. - Pastor Jon Courson

                              If your grace ain't greasier than a bucket full of chitlin's and gravy, you might be a legalist - an internet friend.

                              Comment

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